[net.nlang] Sentences easily misunderstood when heard

dave@cylixd.UUCP (Dave Kirby) (11/07/85)

In article <667@petsd.UUCP> cjh@petsd.UUCP  writes:

>...Hence the occasional "proof by abuse of language:
>     And now and then an undergraduate writes on a homework
>set: "Proof by abusive language: ..."
>
>     Unless you speak with unnatural slowness and distinction,
>they sound the same. 

---------------------------------------------------------------------

And try saying "Isle of view" without it sounding like "I love you."

My dad, a music director, tries hard to keep from cracking up whenever
he hears someone sing the hymn, "Take Your Burden to the Lord and Leave
It There." It is almost impossible to sing that line without it sounding
like: "Take your bird unto the Lord and leave it there."

Another example of a mangled hymn. Try singing "Gladly the Cross I'd Bear"
without it sounding like "Gladly, the cross-eyed bear."

-----------------------------------------------------------------
Dave Kirby    ( ...!ihnp4!akgub!cylixd!dave)
"Don't tell ME what kind of day to have!"

jcp@osiris.UUCP (Jody Patilla) (11/11/85)

> Another example of a mangled hymn. Try singing "Gladly the Cross I'd Bear"
> without it sounding like "Gladly, the cross-eyed bear."
> 

	And don't forget the psalm that goes "Shirley, good Mrs. Murphy shall
follow us..."

-- 
jcpatilla

jsq@im4u.UUCP (John Quarterman) (11/13/85)

"I'd just as soon do that"  ->  "I'd just assume do that"
-- 
John Quarterman,   UUCP:  {ihnp4,seismo,harvard,gatech}!ut-sally!im4u!jsq
ARPA Internet and CSNET:  jsq@im4u.UTEXAS.EDU, formerly jsq@im4u.ARPA

stu16@whuxl.UUCP (SMITH) (11/13/85)

> > Another example of a mangled hymn. Try singing "Gladly the Cross I'd Bear"
> > without it sounding like "Gladly, the cross-eyed bear."
> > 
> 
> 
> -- 
> jcpatilla



      Our father, who Art in heaven, Harold be thy name
................   Lead us not into Penn Station, but
deliver us from Meadville ...........
                                        and then

> 	                                     "Shirley, the good
 Mrs. Murphy shall  follow us..."
-- 
whuxl!stu16
(mamawitch)

wyatt@cfa.UUCP (Bill Wyatt) (11/14/85)

OK - my 2 cents:

In college, I proofread a roommate's paper and marked out the phrase
"for all intensive purposes". He *insisted* that this was correct, and
argued about "intenseness" as a modifier for a purpose, etc. He left it
that way.

I (much later) heard from a second roomie that he had been sworn to secrecy
that the TA had, naturally, corrected it to "for all intents and purposes".
-- 
Bill    UUCP:  {harvard,genrad,allegra,ihnp4}!wjh12!cfa!wyatt
Wyatt   ARPA:  wyatt%cfa.UUCP@harvard.ARPA

kort@hounx.UUCP (B.KORT) (11/17/85)

My favorite 6-year old thought that "Please rise for the Call to Worship"
was "Please rise for the Culture Workshop."

mcgill@alice.UucP (Bob McGill) (11/18/85)

How about
"I led the pigeons to the flag of the United States, and to the
Republican Richard Stands."

td@alice.UucP (Tom Duff) (11/18/85)

The following ``Warning to Beagle Owners'' was generated by
Ron Hardin's autopunner, an amusing application of an online
pronouncing dictionary.  Full appreciation requires
a nimble tongue and an open mind.

  Better buy perfect Topeka beagle buffers
  Topeka beagle buffers sputter fiber beaks
  Effeter fiber beaks abetted feeble puppies
  Worst Topeka beagle puppies feature viper-pique.

marcus@wanginst.UUCP (Bob Marcus) (11/18/85)

Kids are especially good at this.  One little boy told his teacher that his
favorite song was "The Ants Are My Friends."  I'm sure you know it:

"The ants are my friends, they're blowin' in the wind,
The ants are blowin' in the wind."

-- 
Bob Marcus                               marcus@wanginst        (Csnet)
Wang Institute of Graduate Studies       wanginst!marcus        (UUCP)
Tyng Road, Tyngsboro, MA 01879           (617) 649-9731

gkloker@utai.UUCP (Geoff Loker) (11/25/85)

In article <400@hounx.UUCP> kort@hounx.UUCP (B.KORT) writes:
>My favorite 6-year old thought that "Please rise for the Call to Worship"
>was "Please rise for the Culture Workshop."

I have a friend who tells me that when they were small, they heard
the Bible story about Meshach, Shadrach and Abednego, and thought
that it was about "My shack, your shack, and a bungalow."

-- 
Geoff Loker
Department of Computer Science
University of Toronto
Toronto, ON
M5S 1A4

USENET:	{ihnp4 decwrl utzoo uw-beaver}!utcsri!utai!gkloker
CSNET:		gkloker@toronto
ARPANET:	gkloker.toronto@csnet-relay

stu16@whuxl.UUCP (SMITH) (11/26/85)

>   Better buy perfect Topeka beagle buffers
>   Topeka beagle buffers sputter fiber beaks
>   Effeter fiber beaks abetted feeble puppies
>   Worst Topeka beagle puppies feature viper-pique.



     First of all, where IS Ron Hardin these days? Haven't
seen him in at least 11 years---when he used to roam the
hallowed halls of Bell Labs in his orange motorcycle
coveralls.
     Anyway, lots of years ago there was a radio program in
the NYC area that featured a person who could pinpoint a
person's place of origin in the US by the way said person
pronounced the following:

                  Marry merry Mary Murry.

Of course we NYers pronounced each word differently.
-- 
whuxl!stu16
(mamawitch)

ccrrick@ucdavis.UUCP (Rick Heli) (11/28/85)

"Keep your depth list sorted." can sound like 
"Keep your death list sordid." during your 8 AM graphics class.

roy@phri.UUCP (Roy Smith) (12/02/85)

What about the Beatles' classic "She's got a chicken tonight"?
-- 
Roy Smith <allegra!phri!roy>
System Administrator, Public Health Research Institute
455 First Avenue, New York, NY 10016

andrew@grkermi.UUCP (Andrew W. Rogers) (12/03/85)

In article <2037@phri.UUCP> roy@phri.UUCP (Roy Smith) writes:
>What about the Beatles' classic "She's got a chicken tonight"?

Or CCR's "There's A Bathroom On The Right"?

AWR