jim@artecon.UUCP (Jim Wang) (01/03/86)
This is a summary of the reponses to my earlier request for useful aviation adages. Many thanks to the many net.aviation readers who responded; this newgroup has got to rank as the friendliest on the net, since I got many replies and NO flames (thanks, net.aviation friends). Rick Auricchio (apple!rick) gave the following reference for more aviation adages. I haven't found it yet, but it sounds like it'll be "on the numbers." >There's a book which is loaded with 'em, neatly calligraphed. > > I'd Rather Be Flying > Donna M. Vasko > 1980, ISBN 0-9604308-0-6 > > No publisher; the author's address: > Calligraphy by Donna > 565 S.E. Airpark Drive > Bend, OR 97702 > >I found a copy in a local bookstore; it's paperback, 8.5x11, about 0.5 inch >thick, with a dark red cover. Thanks to the following for responding: - James Lipscomb (unc!jl) - Robert J. Evans (cae780!rje) - Larry Miller (lmiller@isi-hobgoblin) - Rick Auricchio (apple!rick) - jeff williams (ihnp3!cfiaime) - Jan Wolitzky (mhuxd!wolit) - Col. Pete Cook (pcook@mcc) - Stanford N Payzer (scc-vax!stanford) - geo (necis!geo) - Al Gettier (infoswx!al) I got a couple variations of "useless things" and GUMPS, but they all have the same idea. So, without further ado, here are the adages. Jim Wang N4766L (jim@seismo, seismo!jim) P.S. Sorry for the delay in posting this summary - our news connection has been flaky of late, so I was waiting for a more dependable period. --------------------------------------------------- There is nothing as useless as the altitude above you, the runway behind you, or the fuel you left behind. The three most useless things to a pilot are runway behind you, altitude above you, and a tenth of a second ago. Nothing is as useless as the runway behind you or the altitude over your head. The 4 most useless things to a pilot: runway behind, altitude above, fuel in the fuel truck, and (? blue sky behind?). Uhh, maybe it was 3 useless things. --------------------------------------------------- GUMP. [Landing checklist: Gas to fullest tank, Undercarriage down, Mixture rich, Prop to max r.p.m.] GUMPS (Gas, Undercarriage, Mixture, Props, Seatbelts) GUMPS - landing check list Gas - most full tank Undercarriage - either fixed or down Mixture - rich Propellor - full forward Switches - fuel pump, landing light, etc. --------------------------------------------------- The four fundamentals of flying: stall, spin, crash, and burn. Why limit it to little homilies? Rules of thumb would be nice too. One that has always stuck with me is converting indicated to true airspeed, first mentioned by an odd character too long in the tropics, at an island airstrip off British Honduras: add 2 percent per 1000 feet. It's surprisingly accurate, and quite useful. Mooney pilots like their tail backwards. Keep it low, slow, and within gliding distance. Navigation: East is least, west is best. (Variation.) True Virgins Make dull Company. (True direction to compass direction.) Can Dead Men Vote Twice? (Compass to true conversion.) Odd people fly east. (Hemispherical rule) Emergencies: Climb, Confess, Comply. When in worry, when in doubt, run in circles, scream and shout. (This in the days of the triangliar pattern if in trouble.) Find it, Fix it, Feather it, Forget it. (Multi-engine emergency procedures) Dead foot, dead engine. (Multi-engine emergency procedures) Checklists: CIFFTRS (Controls, Instruments, Fuel, Flaps, Trim, Runup, Seatbelts) Old Standbys: "I Tol' Wilbur, I tol' Orville, I tol' that there Glen Curtiss feller from New York, I tol' 'em, Fellers, it ain't gonna fly." "There I was, flat on my back at 30,000 feet..." In God we trust, everything else we check. Put your faith in God and Pratt & Whitney. You can't go wrong with a Wright. (Engines.) "If you can close the door, it will fly." (Famous last words.) Son, think of those as cumulo-concrete. It's better to be on the ground, wishing you were flying, than to be flying, wishing you were on the ground. >From a high to a low, look out below. [When flying from a high-pressure area to a low-pressure area, the altimeter reads high.] Plan your flight, fly your plan. East is least, west is best. [Subtract easterly magnetic variation, add westerly variation.] 4 T's. [For an IFR procedure turn: Throttle (back), Time, Turn, Talk.] [Not really an adage, but: "Missed Approach" (FAA) = "Go-Around" (Air Force) = "Wave-Off" (Navy) = "Co-Pilot Error" (Airlines) ] Back when the 55th Weather ReconRon was pushing WB-50's around there were a couple: "Weather Reconnaissance is hours and hours of boredom punctuated with moments of stark terror." "Never tell your co-pilot 'Cheer Up!' on takeoff roll" (On landing roll) "Cheated death again!" "When you hear the hiss, you're clear to P***." Any incident you survive is called experience. A good landing is any one you can walk away from. The purpose of the propeller is as a fan to keep the pilot cool. Turn it off and watch him sweat. There are old pilots and bold pilots, but no old, bold, pilots. Trust your instruments. Always double check your instruments. If you blunder into {spin, IFR} just let go of the controls. "Step on the ball" - useful for knowing which rudder to use "East is least and west is best" - magnetic correction "Eight hours between bottle and throttle" - nuff said Better to be down here wishing you were up there, than up there wishing you were down here. Don't worry about being in a dangerous situation, you have the rest of your life to straighten it out.
irwin@uiucdcs.CS.UIUC.EDU (01/16/86)
Add this one: A supercharger is a device that bull s**** the engine into thinking it is at sea level when it is at 30,000 feet.