wn9nbt@pur-ee.UUCP (06/15/83)
#N:ecn-ec:5600011:000:2939
ecn-ec!wn9nbt Jun 14 22:18:00 1983
I probably should have posted this to net.jokes, but I thought
it would be appreciated more here. It was passed around at one
of the local club's antenna parties recently and I couldn't resist
typing it in. I am not sure of its origin, but it is many photo-
copy generations old.
Antenna Raising Incident
I'm writing in response to your request for additional informa-
tion for block number 3 of the Accident Report Form. I put "poor
planning" as the cause of my accident. You said in your letter
that I should explain in more detail. I trust that the following
will be sufficient.
I am an Amateur Radio Operator and on the day of the accident I
was working alone on the top section of my new 80' tower. When I
had completed my work I discovered that I had, over the course of
several trips up the tower, brought up about 300 pounds of tools
and hardware. Rather than carry the now un-needed tools and ma-
terials down by hand, I decided to lower the items down in a
small barrel by using a pulley, which fortunately was attached to
the gin pole at the top of the tower.
Securing the rope at ground level, I went to the top of the tower
and loaded the tools and hardware into the barrel. I went back
to the ground and untied the rope holding it tightly to insure a
slow descent of the 300 lbs of tools. You will note in block
number 11 of the Accident Report Form that I weigh only 155 lbs.
Due to my surprise at being jerked off the ground so suddenly, I
lost my presence of mind and forgot to let go of the rope. Need-
less to say, I proceeded at a rather rapid rate of speed up the
side of the tower. In the vicinity of the 40' level, I met the
barrel comming down. This explains my fractured skull and col-
larbone. Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not
stopping until the fingers of my right hand were two knuckles
deep into the pulley.
Fortunately, by this time, I had regained my presence of mind and
was able to hold on to the rope in spite of the pain. At approx-
imately the same time however, the barrel of tools hit the ground
and the bottom fell out of the barrel. Devoid of the weight of
the tools, the barrel now weighed 20 lbs. I refer you again to
my weight in block number 11. As you might imagine, I began a
rapid descent down the side of the tower. In the vicinity of the
40' level I met the barrel comming up. This accounts for my two
fractured ankles and the lacerations on my legs and lower body.
The encounter with the barrel slowed me enough to lessen my inju-
ries when I fell on the pile of tools, and fortunately only 3
vertebra were cracked. I'm sorry to report however, that as I
lay there on the tools, in extreme pain, unable to stand, and
watching the empty barrel 80' above me, I again lost my presence
of mind. I let go of the rope.
Dave Chasey - wn9nbt
pur-ee!wn9nbtberry@zinfandel.UUCP (06/30/83)
#R:ecn-ec:5600011:zinfandel:6100001:000:243 zinfandel!berry Jun 29 16:12:00 1983 I originally heard a version of the "tower and barrel of tools" on an old Goon Show record. It's always hilarious, and I love seeing the endless variations! Berry Kercheval Zehntel Inc. (decvax!sytek!zehntel!zinfandel!berry) (415)932-6900