pingali@.cs.umass.edu (Sridhar Pingali) (05/18/91)
There is the experience of thoughts arising and passing away and there is the question "Who is the knower"? There is no "knower". There is only "knowing". Thoughts are transient and fleeting - that is a fact. That fact can only be seen with awareness - mindfulness. But meditation does not end there. Not only are thoughts transient and fleeting - consciousness itself is fleeting and transient. It is also an empty phenomenon that arises and passes away. Buddhist meditation masters speak of this as a real turning point in practice. *Everything* that arises is impermanent and is falling away. There is then no resting place at all - there is nothing to be grasped, no security even in awareness. Only when all the foundations of a belief in an abiding self have been undermined are we left with the wisdom of insecurity. There is complete protection and freedom because there is *no one* to be protected. When Buddhists say "anatman" - they mean just that. The reason we speak of thoughts is that the mind gets attached to thoughts so easily - they can very quickly overwhelm us. Freedom comes from the *seeing* of the truth not from *doing* anything or trying to manipulate the mind into a different state. The power of the mind states of anger, fear, lust etc. is such that we can actually feel the movement towards strong attachment when they arise. The Buddha was not satisfied with the exalted states of meditation that he attained to while studying with Alara Kalama and Addaka Ramaputta - because after all that, his mind was still subject to defilements. Those states did not represent complete freedom. His aim was to attain to total, completely unconditioned freedom. A billion eons of bliss is not enough. The Buddha asked whether greed, hatred and delusion can be *utterly* uprooted from the mind. We too should be asking the same question. All kinds of transcendental experiences are possible in meditation - rivers of light and floods of love, states of grace, oneness and bliss. But are these states permanent? Is there total freedom from all craving and all defilements *now*, now, now? We can *believe* whatever we want to - that we are always free, in a Self, in Atman = Brahman, in theories about anatman, etc, etc. - but of what use are these beliefs? And, anybody who sits on a zafu long enough has insights. This is not enough either - in the words of Stephen Mitchell, we have to get rid of *all* our karmic gunk. For this we really need to go deep within ourselves and become completely transparent. All this requires great effort, sustained mindfulness and continuous practice. None of this is to deny the blessings that come from practising under an enlightened being. Innumerable people who have had the great good fortune to come into the presence of Bhagawan Sri Ramana Maharshi have testified to this fact. That is the greatest aid that one could have on the path. But even so - nobody can *give* you freedom. If the Buddhas could set us free, I imagine they would have done so already. Buddha Dharma doesn't have much to say about any underlying, undifferentiated oneness - Shakyamuni Buddha's Enlightenment 2500 years ago is not taking away our pain right here, right now. It is upto us to practice or not. Peace, Sridhar