tey@sage.cc.purdue.edu (01/19/90)
Once again, the door opens, and an auburn-haired man of moderate
build and scruffy appearance enters. He kicks the snow off of
what might have once been white canvas sneakers and orders a large
tumbler of tequila from the bar. Mike eyes him for a moment, but
several days of unshaven stubble allow him his refreshment.
The stranger sips his drink, watching and listening and looking
rather cold, despite his proximity to the fire. After several false
starts, he finally steps up to the line...He has a pale complexion,
short-cut, reddish-brown hair, and sad green eyes. He is about 5'9",
slightly built(some might say skinny), but reasonably muscular. He
introduces himself as 'Legion', and stares at his glass a moment
before continuing.
"A few previous articles have hit a bit close to home, which is why
I've decided to finally come out of the woodwork and post my thoughts.
I have a soul-mate...or rather, I _used_ to have one...I met her
several years ago on the bus, coming home from high school one fall.
Even though it was late October, I had never noticed her before; in fact,
I wasn't even sure who she was when I met her...a girl sitting in front
of my was wearing a black "Blues Brothers"-style porkpie hat, and at a
sudden urge, picked it up and placed it on my own head. To this day, I
donb't know what made me do that. She turned around, rather surprised,
and we had a shrt conversation before I had to leave.
"I was a junior and she was a freshman, although she was only a year
younger than myself. Since her parents didn't want her out late on school
nights, and I had only limited access(at best) to a car, we substituted
walking and talking together after school for ordinary dating. In fact,
our only 'real' date was to a friend's Halloween party. But this
wasn't really what either of us wanted, and we broke up over Christmas
break.
"A year later, in the spring, she started showing up in places I frequented,
and we flirted some. I was wary at first, but we soon started dating again.
This time there was no denying it: We were in love. We felt totally at
ease with each other. She was vibrant and outgoing, I was calm and reserved;
when she felt stressed-out, I made her feel better; when I was depressed,
she did the same for me. That summer, we gave each other the greatest gift
we had: our virginity."
He pauses a few seconds, blinking back tears of pain and joy and memory...
"That fall, I went off to Purdue, while she remained in Louisville, 3 1/2
hours away, finishing high school. We never cried so much before the
night I left. But we persevered...I came back whatever weekends I could,
we stillfelt the same about each other, Christmas was hell(a story for
another time), but we made it all the way back to summer, strong as ever.
We even talked about seeing ourselves together, years from now...different
in ways, but still with the same strange quirks we fell in love with.
"Then came the fall, and I returned to college, while she began her senior
year. Nothing seemed wrong, there were no bizarre omens, but somhow,
during this past semester, we Changed. She felt ill-at-ease, and I've
never been good with subtle hints, and we stopped communicating. Then, over
Xmas break(again), we broke a second time. I have never seriously considered
suicide an option(despite the opinion of others in the bar), but several
times I felt the pain alone would stop my heart from beating. Sometimes
I wished it would."
He takes a final, long pull of the tequila to steel himself once more.
"I do wish to remain friends with her, but perhaps for selfish reasons,
as I intend to tell her when next I journey homeward. I really believe
in wonderful, magical things; In unicorns and dragons, in dashing knights
and fair maidens...and I believe in 'happily ever after'. I _don't_ believe
something as wonderful as what we had can ever be turned away. We broke
up once, and changed a great deal...Those changes allowed us to come
together a second time. Perhaps it is time for us to change again. There
is a bond between us which cannot be broken, and I believe it will someday
blossom into something that legends are written of..."
With this, he wipes his eyes on his sleeve and shouts "Here's to love; the
most wonderful and horrible emotion yet known! Long may it wave!", and
smashes his tumbler into the fireplace, where the shards reflect his
sad green eyes awhile longer.
"Don't be afraid of the dark/ *
Only you hear the scream that you scream/ * tey@sage.cc.purdue.edu
Don't turn away from the light/ * Legion
Only you see the dream that you dream." *
P. Townshend * I _am_ a snowball in helluucibg@swbatl.UUCP (3929) (01/19/90)
The door opens and Brian wanders in, looking a bit distracted. Shrugging of
his grey wool overcoat and loosening the tie he's wearing (silly things),
he steps up to the bar.
"Give me a Ginger Ale, Mike," he says, placing two roles of pennies on the bar.
Quaffing most of the drink and sighing, he approaches the chalk line.
"Well, folks, Life surprised me again. You'd think by now I wouldn't go in
with preconceptions," he says with a smile. "Ah well, something I'm letting
happen; gettting rid of preconceptions, that is. My ex-fiance and I talked
last night. Boy did I give her the wrong impression the night before last.
She thought I was trying to politely tell her that I didn't want to see her
anymore. So I reassured her that she is one of my closest friend and that
I hope to never lose that, regardless of whatever else may happen."
"It's really, really frightening to go through one of these misunderstandings.
They shake me up, because the point out how alone we each really are, in some
fundamental sense. They make me want to reach out and *hug* those I care
about."
"Of course, I'm sure that my life will continue to be the personal soap opera
it's been for about the last 6 months. If things ever get relatively settled
down again (relative to my normal life that is: my life is pretty safe, secure,
and comfortable in general and I really don't have anything to complain
about...well, not many things :-), I don't know how I'll react. But enough
rambling, and on to the toast. It's an oldie but that's okay."
To friends. May they never be lost to misunderstandings!" CRASH
Thanks,
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Brian R. Gilstrap ...!{ texbell, uunet }!swbatl!uucibg OR uucibg@swbatl.UUCP
One Bell Center +----------------------------------------------------------
Rm 17-G-4 | "Winnie-the-Pooh read the two notices very carefully,
St. Louis, MO 63101 | first from left to right, and afterwards, in case he had
(314) 235-3929 | missed some of it, from right to left." -- A. A. Milne
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Disclaimer:
Me, speak for my company? You must be joking. I'm just speaking my mind.