Stephen.White@f853.n681.z3.fidonet.org (Stephen White) (01/05/90)
Index Number: 6078 > have been or are typically more tolerant of my attempts > to use their language. But, afterall, being deaf, doesn't > mean that that person is automatically going to be a nice > person period. Deaf people can be just as big a jerk as Yer! 100%! I actually find that there is a bigger proportion of jerks in the deaf community - and these jerks are usually to be found in the extremes, like the sole deaf child in a hearing family, or a radical family of solely deaf. In the former case, they grow out of it - they are only jerks because they dont know or want to accept who they are. This could be because they think their body is 100% them, not the lesser fraction it really is. In the latter - these people are OK with other deaf people, but extremely rude to the hearing or partially deaf. Could be insecurity. Actually, I think all forms of rudeness spring from insecurity. Any debate? When I "joined" the deaf community, the jerk ratio went up! Heh Heh! Steve! The Child of a Lesser God! -- Uucp: ..!{decvax,oliveb}!bunker!hcap!hnews!3!681!853!Stephen.White Internet: Stephen.White@f853.n681.z3.fidonet.org
Rich.Harper@f419.n104.z1.fidonet.org (Rich Harper) (01/05/90)
Index Number: 6110
No comment on the deaf people. But would say that once you have to
join the disabled folks after having lived your life as an abled person, you
do tend to be insecure.
Like myself. I became disabled because of problems in breathing and
arthritis. Now, all of my training and experience in the work world is down
the drain, and I must learn something completely new. And there are few
companies that will give a man over 50 the time of day in the US. So I am
feeling mighty insecure. The biggest problem is the fact that the arthritis
is permenant, but they think that the breathing problem will or might get
better and this is the primary disability. So I have to have a review in
about a year. If they classify me as being able to work, I will recieve no
more benifits. I guess, then, I will be pushing hamburgers like so many of
the other older folks.
<<Rich>>
P. S. Happy Holidays to all of you in OZ.
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Uucp: ..!{decvax,oliveb}!bunker!hcap!hnews!104!419!Rich.Harper
Internet: Rich.Harper@f419.n104.z1.fidonet.orgPat.Goltz@f3.n300.z1.fidonet.org (Pat Goltz) (01/05/90)
Index Number: 6118
You have said that your arthritis is permanent. As far as allopathic
medicine is concerned, that is true. You might want to look into some
natural methods of alleviating it.
I once began to develop the symptoms of rheumatoid arthritis. But I
treated it with diet and herbs, and recovered fully.
Pat
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Uucp: ..!{decvax,oliveb}!bunker!hcap!hnews!300!3!Pat.Goltz
Internet: Pat.Goltz@f3.n300.z1.fidonet.orgDiane.Oliff@p0.f197.n253.z2.fidonet.org (Diane Oliff) (01/05/90)
Index Number: 6132
In a message to Jack O'keeffe Of 129/26 <12-19-89 15:38> Vixen * wrote:
V**> I will admit, that I have been hurt by some deaf, who have
V**> been rude to the extreme to me, but in total, I am not sure
I wish that hadn't happened - I can only say, having grown up in the 'deaf
establishment' from which a miracle has now in a large part removed me, I
know that some people get hold of the idea that there is a 'right way' to be
deaf and if you don't do what they are saying then you are to be criticised.
I remember getting a really hard time when I was about seven, and wasn't
hearing anything comprehensible from the outside world, from a new
administrator who spent about half an hour lecturing me (in sign and in
writing) for not wearing an aid, ("you cannot expect others to help you if
you won't help yourself") and only stopped when someone that knew me came
into the room and pointed out that I had no ears nor any auditory canal,
which would mean that not only was there nothing to hang an aid on but
nothing for it to feed into either!
It's funny now, but it wasn't then.
Even after they bored some holes for me, it was still difficult to wear an
aid on the plastic mushrooms they used to call prostheses (they had a habit
of falling off and lying on the table looking like a nasty mistake the cat
found outside), and there is an awful lot of people that believe that being
deaf is both contagious and anyway we are doing it deliberately to annoy
them and can understand perfectly well if we would only try harder.
I remember once, when I was getting a right going over for not
understanding, and being yelled at (which hurt but didn't make things any
clearer) pulling off the prosthesis and giving it to the other person and
saying 'why don't you shout right into it in your hand ' which made me feel
better at the time but wasn't the answer!
Love and good wishes to you Vixen - your wonderful messages and spirit in
this Conference helped me when I was having a bad time earlier in 1989, and
I wish you everything good in your life - you read like a wonderful and
exciting person to know...
Diane Oliff
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Uucp: ..!{decvax,oliveb}!bunker!hcap!hnews!2!253!197.0!Diane.Oliff
Internet: Diane.Oliff@p0.f197.n253.z2.fidonet.orgDiane.Oliff@p0.f197.n253.z2.fidonet.org (Diane Oliff) (01/05/90)
Index Number: 6138
In a message to Vixen * <12-23-89 23:20> Stephen White wrote:
SW*>proportion of jerks in the deaf community - and these jerks
SW*>are usually to be found in the extremes, like the sole deaf
SW*>child in a hearing family, or a radical family of solely
SW*>deaf.
Hey come on!
SW*>In the former case, they grow out of it - they are only
SW*>jerks because they dont know or want to accept who they
SW*>are. This could be because they think their body is 100%
SW*>them, not the lesser fraction it really is.
How else am I supposed to think? If I accept who and what I am, then I
accept that I'm 100% ME. I ain't no lesser fraction of anything. I'm
different from other people - so are you, so is everyone. It would be a bit
boring if we were all exactly the same, wouldn't it?
So my differences are a bit different - well, I wouldn't have it any other
way, and if you think about it, who would want to wake up every day thinking
of themselves as a partial person?
On some deaf people being jerks - well. Some blind people are real pigs -
not because they are blind, but because they are pigs. Being different
(blind, deaf, physially otherwise) doesn't mean you're a saint - it
certainly doesn't mean I'm a saint, so if you met me on a bad day you could
make a statement:
Girls of 21 with no ears are real jerks
and it would be true.
but not today, not most days, and I think a deaf kid in a hearing family is
as much as anything esle feeling confused and excluded by so much happening
around him or her that they get upset, and maybe a bit angry too, because
they just don't understand what is going on.
I know I did.
Diane Oliff
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Uucp: ..!{decvax,oliveb}!bunker!hcap!hnews!2!253!197.0!Diane.Oliff
Internet: Diane.Oliff@p0.f197.n253.z2.fidonet.orgStephen.White@f853.n681.z3.fidonet.org (Stephen White) (01/12/90)
Index Number: 6206 > No comment on the deaf people. But would say that > once you have tojoin > the disabled folks after having lived your life as an abled > person, youdo tend Definately! Perhaps I'm not being assertive enough, and letting the people who cannot be bothered talking to me, because I dont know the sign for xylophone, fob me off. Any of you out there seen the video "Captain Johnno"? .-. . _ _ `-. +- ;-` || ;-` `-' `- `- `' `- -- Uucp: ..!{decvax,oliveb}!bunker!hcap!hnews!3!681!853!Stephen.White Internet: Stephen.White@f853.n681.z3.fidonet.org
Laurie.Wilson@p0.f5.n119.z1.fidonet.org (Laurie Wilson) (01/12/90)
Index Number: 6222 > letting the people who cannot be bothered talking to me, > because I dont know the sign for xylophone, fob me off. > How about doing this way---if they pissed you off by their attitude, think yourself "Boy, do they have a problem!" And remember they may be envying you for doing so well with hearing world. They probably feel frustrated and inferior, so they would try to put you down because they feel you should sacrifice your hearing ways for them. -- Uucp: ..!{decvax,oliveb}!bunker!hcap!hnews!119!5.0!Laurie.Wilson Internet: Laurie.Wilson@p0.f5.n119.z1.fidonet.org
Stephen.White@f853.n681.z3.fidonet.org (Stephen White) (01/17/90)
Index Number: 6257 > I am, then I accept that I'm 100% ME. I ain't no lesser > fraction of anything. I'm different from other people - > so are you, so is everyone. It would be a bit boring if > we were all exactly the same, wouldn't it? I dont think you quite follow. I'm saying that some people think that their bodies are all they are; ie their disability makes them inferior. I disagree with this. I think that the physical component is only a part of the whole package, and the mental part is more significant. Personality, charm, intelligence, et al are all important. > So my differences are a bit different - well, I wouldn't > have it any other > way, and if you think about it, who would want to wake > up every day thinking of themselves as a partial person? This would seem to imply that you agree with me, in practise if not in principle. You are happy with yourself the way you are, and you dont think of yourself as inferior. When I said that the extremes of the deaf/blind/austic community tend to have a higher proportion of jerks, I was saying that these people mark themselves off as special or inferior. The sole deaf child in a family tends to regard himself as crippled, since they tend to be treated that way. This is the fault of the wider community, as "normal" people tend not to understand. By the same token, the members of radical deaf familys have marked themselves off as special because of their handicap. They dont think of it as a handicap, yet they are isolating themselves because of it. Thus, they do not really think of themselves as the normal average people, and react adversely to those normal average people that attempt to interact with them. Jerk, is a term that changes with perspective, yet by all measurements, it is possible to avoid this label. People might not think of themselves as jerks, but the majority of people may. This is when I think its appropiate to use the term. So, if these people cannot act normally and pleasantly then jerks they are. > > On some deaf people being jerks - well. Some blind people > are real pigs - not because they are blind, but because > they are pigs. Being different (blind, deaf, physially Here, I sense the inference that you think I am blind (physically, not morally). The truth is that I am also deaf, almost totally, from birth. I dont dispute that there are wankers everywhere, but I still insist that there is a higher proportion of jerks in the respective handicapped communities. Consider it from this viewpoint. Quite a lot of people are not mature enough to stand up for themselves, or feel confident in themselves. If they are physically perfect, then other people will provide the emotional props. In the handicapped, these props are missing, thus they are forced to rely on theirselves. Result? This is also why I think that the jerks are confined to the extremes, and usually grow out of it as they gain in maturity. The mainstream are alright, as they have their emotional props in their peers, and family. Steve! The Child of a Lesser God! -- Uucp: ..!{decvax,oliveb}!bunker!hcap!hnews!3!681!853!Stephen.White Internet: Stephen.White@f853.n681.z3.fidonet.org