Greg.See-Kee@p0.f404.n714.z3.fidonet.org (Greg See-Kee) (03/02/90)
Index Number: 7033
BA> --although I know my Pastor well, and he knows
BA> me as well, I still have Some concerns about being up
BA> there as "the blind woman" rather than being a woman
BA> who Happens to be blind.
Before my own car accident turned me into something like someone
who had a stroke, I was a professional do-gooder.
One of my do-gooding achievements was to launch a radio program
for blind people. I was executive Producer, and they did
everything else.
Then we launched "Radio for the Print Handicapped". Let me know
if you need that explained to you.
What amazed me, as someone who was not disabled, and who had not
been much with disabled people, was that THEY are DISABLED, then
PEOPLE.
Able-Bodied People (I call them ABs) are so familiar with other
ABs, that they treat each other as EQUALS. But should an AB
like I used to be before my accident, should we meet a disabled
person, it is quite a surprise to us.
Some of the surprise is - we don't mix with them, so we don't
know how to react, how to behave with them. All we know about
these DPs are the stereotypes that we've seen on TV or read in
books. So when an AB meets anty rare person, like a DP, then the
AB needs to see if the ideas of this REAL person is anything like
the stereotyped fantasies that he has.
As a colored man living in white Australia, I have alsways had
this problem. The white people would relate to me as a
stereotypical Chinese person. They would apologize because they
didn't have Chinese tea.
"Is it ok if we just have a hamburger & chips? We don't
have rice."
As a professional do-gooder, an Abled-Bodied person, I had the
same problem when I met DPs (Disabled Persons) for the first
time.
In my earlier career as a professional community activist, I met
a wide range of DPs: midgets, deaf, polio, multiple sclerosis,
retarded, schizophrenic, manic-depressives, youth refugees, rape
victims, recent divorcees, and so on.
Each time, I had to see the DP, first in relation to my existing
fantasies and my stereotypes about them. I used these rare
encounters with these exotic people as a learning tool.
BA> plan to first write a letter to my Pastor explaining
BA> to him that it is lonely as hell to be thought of as
BA> "the blind woman" rather than as the person I am. I do
BA> Not want to be interviewed as a blind person. I want
BA> to be interviewed as a person who deals with the
BA> dissability of blindness, and that blindness is Not
BA> the main issue in my life. It is important to me that
BA> people see the woman first, and the disability
Two issues here. You are medically disabled. The ability of the
vision parts of your body are not as able to work, as is normal
in able-bodied people.
However, you are socially & politically handicapped. Just as I
am a colored man, I face handicaps when I try to deal the a
predominantly white society. It is not that they deliberately
are hostile, suspicious nor vindictive to me. They are
handicapped because they only have very untested ideas of what
people like me are supposed to be.
BA> to make this letter as honest and real as posi do not
BA> want to be offensive in the way I write i
Agreed. Talk it out. Rehearse it here. Practice dealing with
uninformed and misinformed people. Most ABs have the wrong ideas
about DPs. There are so many different types of DPs in the
world, I don't blame anyone for being misinformed or ignorant
about DPs.
Let us know how the interview was. What did it feel like?
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Uucp: ..!{decvax,oliveb}!bunker!hcap!hnews!3!714!404.0!Greg.See-Kee
Internet: Greg.See-Kee@p0.f404.n714.z3.fidonet.orgLiz.Campbell@f33.n130.z1.fidonet.org (Liz Campbell) (03/02/90)
Index Number: 7036
I agree that we are often looked uppon differently by those who are
able-bodied.
I never like using the term able-bodied because I feel I'm just ascapable
as anyone else. Anyway, I am constantly amazed that people have
stereotypesof the blind and of people with other disabilities. I used to
cover religion for the Star-Telegram in Fort Worth. I constantly was
asked if I had gone to such and such church to be healed of my
affliction. Now that I have switched to feature writing, that hasn't
happened at al.
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Uucp: ..!{decvax,oliveb}!bunker!hcap!hnews!130!33!Liz.Campbell
Internet: Liz.Campbell@f33.n130.z1.fidonet.orgBarbara.Akin@f15.n114.z1.fidonet.org (Barbara Akin) (03/03/90)
Index Number: 7052
Greg, while I agree with you that just because things are the way they
are, I could be considered "socially handicaped" the problem lies with
those people who cannot see beond a disability to the person!
The refreshing thing in my life is that when people talk to me, and get
to know me, they Do forget about the blindness, and I have infact, even
had a friend ask me "Barb, where did you park your car" as we were
walking out of a meeting!
That, is the greatest compliment I could ever recieve--that the blindness
becomes so insignifigant, that it is altogether forgotten.
Now, I realize that this kind of thing takes time, and that Most people
when we meet for the first time Are thinking about the blindness, and are
posibly uncomfortable.
The way I choose to deal with this however, is to focus on other things
about myself, like the fact that I am a mother, I have two girls, I like
such and such sports, hobbies, where I work, etc.
And a B ig point here is that I focus in on the other person I am talking
to. I have been just blunt enough to come right out and say something
like "look I don't want to stand here and talk about blindness----its
boring to me, besides, its Not the main issue in my life." That kind of
thing Usually gets the message across!
Ofcourse, I am Not saying here that I avoid Ever talking about my
disability. I do Many public educationtalks for schools, civic groups,
etc. Its just that I want to have in my personal relationships, Real
relationships, based on who we are as persons.
As it works out, this has happened for me, and although it Does take
time, and doesn't happen over night, it is still posible.
Well, that's about it for now, thanks for sharing your thoughts with me.
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Uucp: ..!{decvax,oliveb}!bunker!hcap!hnews!114!15!Barbara.Akin
Internet: Barbara.Akin@f15.n114.z1.fidonet.orgVixen.*@f11.n203.z1.fidonet.org (Vixen *) (03/16/90)
Index Number: 7173
Hi Liz
To add to your comment regarding "stereotyping", it also supports
my contention that mis-applications of terminologies and labeling
do in fact result in thought-catalyst-behaviours. We (I think) tend
to act towards others as "we think of them!"
Keepin' the faith!
. Vixen
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Uucp: ..!{decvax,oliveb}!bunker!hcap!hnews!203!11!Vixen.*
Internet: Vixen.*@f11.n203.z1.fidonet.orgera@ncar.ucar.edu (Ed Arnold) (06/01/90)
Index Number: 8557 In article <11999@bunker.UUCP> Pat.Goltz@p4.f3.n300.z1.fidonet.org writes: >Index Number: 8434 > >Sorry, but that is not my argument. I believe "safe sex" is a fraud. >I do not support the use of condoms for protection of any kind. Oh? So if people are going to engage in sex *anyway*, you won't support something that will reduce the terrible toll on society which AIDS is taking? Reducing that toll is a "fraud"? Are you also saying, then, that you don't support ANY form of birth control? If so, you'd better stop railing against abortion. >No, I do not equate unsafe sex with homosexuality. I equate it with >ANY practice outside of marriage. Then you're accusing 90% of the nation of having unsafe sex, including all those couples who lived together before they got married. Pardon me while I chuckle ... > My point is, if other people want to have genital contact outside of >marriage, it is immoral to expect me to pay for their disabilities which >result from these practices, because I do not do these things. If I >choose to help out voluntarily, that is one thing. But coercing me to >help a person with a self-inflicted injury is immoral. I am as much >entitled to benefit from my choice of lifestyle as they are theirs. I >choose prudence, and that is my right. I am not obligated to bail out >people for being imprudent. Here we go down that slippery slope again ... so, if you're not obligated to help them out (EVEN IF they didn't understand the dangers of what they were doing when they did it, due to lack of education), why don't we just do a little euthanasia and get it over with? But, this argument is silly anyway ... assuming you carry health insurance, you're going to be "coerced" into helping persons with "self-inflicted" injuries whether you like it or not. -- Ed Arnold * NCAR * POB 3000, Boulder, CO 80307-3000 * 303-497-1253(w) era@ncar.ucar.edu [128.117.64.4] * era@ncario.bitnet * era@ncar.uucp "See, the human mind is kind of like ... a pinata. When it breaks open, there's a lot of surprises inside." --Jane Wagner/Lily Tomlin