Greg.See-Kee@f631.n712.z3.fidonet.org (Greg See-Kee) (07/25/90)
Index Number: 9508
IATROGENIC (of a medical disorder) caused by the diagnosis,
manner, or treatment of a physican
[Random House Dictionary, Unabridged 2nd ed.]
Another person said in this conference that she becomes
uncomfortable when seeing anothre counsellor who is
disabled.
I feel anxiety to such an extent when I see my
physiothrapist, that many sessions that I pay for, were just
to "remove the tension-headache".
CAUSE: Trying to hard to do the impossible:
To be the PERFECT CLIENT.
Each time I see my therapist, I am aware
"It costs me a lot of physical effort, money & trouble to
come here. I MUST do my best!"
But my physio is trained in the very latest client-centered
technique: Feldenkrais "Awareness Through Movement". She
tries hard to not communicate her expectations/ hopes onto
me, but at the same time, she is aware that the paying
client must sense her expensive professional competence is
worth the trouble, compared to non-professional treatments.
So indirectly I am sensitive to her moods, her expectations,
etc. I try hard to imagine myself - not as I am now, but as
I hope to be. She does not discourage my "positive
thoughts".
My fantasy/ dream is based on who I used to be before my
accident, plus my unfufilled career path, plus a very stupid
belief that I can attain that old career path again. And
the physiotherapy treatment focuses gently - not on what I
can do right now, but on what is just outside my reach.
Most times I don't want to focus on what seems impossible to
me, in my newly disabled body. But the therapy gently
forces my to not ignore the negative aspects of my life.
The stress & anxiety then creates a tension headache.
The final complicating factor that few other people ever
experience: my physiotherapist was an undergraduate in the
same medical faculty where I was a staff member. Not only
is she unmarried, and a few years younger than me, but her
mother likes me too! Her mother is her receptionist.
And because their family is Jewish (mine is Chinese), we
both have a tradition of "matriarchally-arranged marriage
between families", rather than the modern belief in "love".
One day the story might be a good soapie on television.
BTW: the research shows that marriages work best if the
partners have experienced complementary roles in their
family upbringings. This means that a woman who has had an
older brother should marry a man who has had a younger
sister. Both my physio & I qualify in that regard. But I
still want to pursue my career dreams - to be married to my
work. Ohh! Help! I've got another headache ...
:-)
... Zenging from Oz - Down-Under
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