kilroy@gboro.glassboro.edu (Dr Nancy's Sweetie) (05/03/91)
The following is, IMnsHO, the best interpretation of "Who Is The Beast?"
I first wrote this a few years ago, but I've never posted it in src and
the subject has come up (again), so . . .
For people who are new to the net, `mangoe' is Charley Wingate, aka
mangoe@cs.umd.edu, who posts to this group and talk.religion.misc from time
to time. There have been a few changes since this was originally written:
I'm no longer a system hack at UMD -- I'm now a househusband (read `bum'),
and "Nancy's Sweetie" was replaced with "Dr Nancy's Sweetie" when she got
the PhD finished. Some will notice a bandwidth-wasting signature at the end;
apropos, I think, for a bandwidth-wasting article. 8-)
-=-=-
Newsgroups: talk.religion.misc
From: kilroy@mimsy.umd.edu (Nancy's Sweetie)
Subject: Charley Wingate: Christian or AntiChrist?
Reply-To: kilroy@mimsy.umd.edu (Darren F. Provine)
Organization: University of Maryland, Dept. of Computer Sci.
Keywords: `armageddon' `truth' `number of the beast' (okay, that's 4...)
Disclaimer: Brandy the WonderDog knows I'm kidding. If you don't know I'm
kidding, you're a pretty sad camper.
A few months ago, in talk.religion.misc, it was suggested that perhaps
Mr. Charles Wingate was not, despite his claims, a Christian. And we know
that the person making the allegation has proven to be a fine, upstanding,
Bible-believing man, where Mr. Wingate has advocated the use of *worldly*
*wisdom* in criticism of God's Scriptures.
You may already know that Mr. Wingate's login is `mangoe' -- is this
misspelling intended to mask some association he has with fruit-worshippers?
Or is it something more sinister? I have the TRUTH, and I guarantee that
it will SHOCK you to read!!!!
This author has it on good authority that part of the origin of this name
comes from a so-called "fantasy role-playing game", which is actually
nothing more than a way for the *forces of evil* to dupe those ignorant of
God's Laws to *chant spells designed to call up DEMONS*. Yes, the very
origin of Mr. Wingate's userid is rooted in *blasphemy*!
But now we have NEW *evidence* which clearly shows the need for IMMEDIATE
action to prevent untold suffering!
You see, in the course of my duties as a Systems Programmer here at the
University of Maryland, I often write new software to assist in the daily
operations of the Systems Staff. And yesterday I was working on a program
to assist in the installation & removal of accounts, which requires some
munging of /etc/passwd.
As I was looking over that file on this very machine (mimsy.umd.edu), I
noticed something which showed me just how close to ARMAGEDDON we truly are!
Yes, these are truly the last days, and now I can PROVE it!
For the fact of the matter is that Charley Wingate's uid number on all
Unix systems at the University of Maryland is *666* !!!!!!
Yes, perhaps not even the man who calls himself `mangoe@mimsy' is aware of
the fact that without IMMEDIATE action, he will be used as an AGENT of
SATAN, and will help to cause the APOCALYPSE by deceiving MILLIONS!!!
But is this truly unstoppable? Do we have no recourse but to lay down and
die? NO! Now is the time for ACTION!!! A group of true, God-fearing men
have organised into a body called "Mangoe Mashers". This organisation (of
which I am the founder and sole member) shall prevent Mr. Wingate's
unwitting assitance in causing the DESTRUCTION of millions of innocent
souls!!!
But we need your help! We cannot do it alone! "But what can I do?" you
ask? Join us!
To join, simply mail us a blank, signed check, along with your current
account balance -- it will be the most important donation of your life! All
members of Mangoe Mashers receive a packet of literature detailing what they
can do to help, and describing the many uses to which their money is being
put. You'll see all the details of the planned fact-finding mission to
Aruba, as well as the plans for the proposed Mangoe Mashers Mansion, a place
devoted to the study of the Scriptures (along with other illuminating
material published by Playboy Enterprises, Inc.)
So do your part to hinder the AntiChrist! Join now! Join often!
+-----------------------------< cut here >----------------------------------+
| |
| YES, Brother kilroy, I want to help you in your fight to prevent the |
| AntiChrist from destroying America! Here is my blank check, and my |
| current account balance -- take what you need, as I know your work is |
| important. And send me my Mangoe Mashers Information Packet, so I can |
| keep up with the carryings-on of our Board of Directors and his |
| girlfriends. |
| |
| name: |
| address: |
| |
| Send to: Darren F. Provine |
| A V Williams Bldg. |
| University of Maryland |
| College Park, MD, 20742 |
| |
+-----------------------------< cut here >----------------------------------+
Yours for the preservation of goodness and normalcy,
kilroy
______
/ \
| o o |
uunet!mimsy!kilroy-------OOO-----+--/ \--+-----OOO------kilroy@mimsy.umd.edu
| ( ) |
| kilroy \__/ was here ! |
Darren F. Provine |
University of Maryland___________Disclaimer: Then again, maybe he wasn't...|