sandyg@sail.LABS.TEK.COM (Sandy Grossmann) (11/17/90)
WHITE PALACE
A film review by Sandy Grossman
Copyright 1990 Sandy Grossman
Cast: Susan Sarandon, James Spader
Director: Luis Mandoki
Screenplay: Ted Tally and Alvin Sargent
Synopsis: Repressed, sad 27-yr-old yuppie male meets outgoing, seemingly
happy 43-yr-old lower-class female. They have sex. They
don't talk much. They have more sex. They get stuck between
having an affair and a relationship. And we get stuck watching
a mediocre film.
Max (James Spader) lives alone in a big expensive house. He combs
the fringe of his Oriental rug with his fingers. Twice, in case we
didn't catch it the first time. Label him Repressed. Mr. Repressed
goes to a bachelor's party, bringing with him 50 White Castles--uhm,
White Palaces.
[What is a White Castle/Palace? I'm glad you asked. It's a square
hamburger with a hole in the middle. It's cooked in lots of tasty
grease, which also flavors the square buns. The grease is tasty because
they cook onions in it. It's more a religion than a meal. Anyway,
trademarks being what they are, White Castle is transformed into White
Palace.]
So. Mr. Repressed returns to the party and discovers that he only
received 44 White Palaces--6 of the boxes are *empty*! Standing on
principle, he insists on leaving the party and returning to White
Palace to get the other burgers. Once there, he argues with Nora the
Waitress (Susan Sarandon) and finally gets his $3.00 or so back.
(Yeah, I know, he was gonna get burgers. Hey, I didn't write it.)
He returns to the party and has an awful time because for some
reason everyone is watching slides and of course the slide projector
gets stuck when showing a picture of his dead wife. At least the slide
didn't burn, which is what I was expecting.
After having such an awful time, Mr. Repressed goes to a seedy
bar. Why? Well, this is just a guess, but let's assume that all
yuppies are shallow and don't know how to have fun. Apparently
Mr. Repressed recognizes this truth and, realizing that low-class
barflies have more fun, drives to the nearest dump. Now for the
Coincidence. Guess who's at the generic seedy bar? Guess who does
everything she can to pick up Mr. Repressed? Guess where they wind
up?
The director wanted Sarandon to look and sound cheap. She does.
Time for the Explicit Sex Scene, where she, uhm, either rapes or seduces
Mr. Repressed, take your pick. During this scene, Nora bestows oral
favors, thereby reawakening Max's zest for life. But wait, there's
less.
This is, for the most part, a cheap shot at a film. The more I
think about it, the less I like it. The script depends on our
willingness to buy into well-worn caricatures: Jews are loud,
opinionated busybodies (except, of course, for the quiet Mr. Repressed).
Waitresses at hamburger joints live in filthy, ugly shacks and do
nothing but smoke, eat, litter, and screw. Young urban professionals
are superficial and repressed. Etcetera.
Even the sets are caricatures. For example, Max's living room
contains a baby grand piano. Not because of his involvement with music,
mind you. It's yet another prop showing wealth. In deliberate
contrast, Nora's dump of a shack is so dark, you'll want out more than
she does. Which could've been effective if shown only for a few scenes,
but nooooooo. Nearly the whole movie is filmed there.
The theme of opposites attracting is just as much a caricature.
Mr. Repressed and Ms. Waitress aren't real characters, they're grocery
lists of stereotypical traits. He likes opera; she likes the Oak Ridge
Boys.
The story is some sort of weird variant of Cinderella, done worse
than most writers could manage. If that's not sufficient reason to
laugh at this film, consider the casting. James Spader, the ultimate
WASP, is the Jewish yuppie. Right. Susan Sarandon sports a truly
unusual hick accent that I never heard once while I lived in St. Louis,
and I lived there 17 years. It's hard to turn a silk purse into a sow's
ear.
There are two very well-played scenes, though. Especially the last
scene, which cleverly puts a nice taste in your mouth right as you're
ready to leave the theatre. It's not a total loss, just a big
disappointment.
In summary, the film is heavy-handed in nearly everything it does,
and there ain't much relief from it. A few funny lines seem incredibly
clever because they rise out of such a mire. Most of the time, though,
you'll feel more out of place in this film than in a David Lynch movie.
I don't understand why this movie hasn't been blasted by other
reviewers. What do people see in this film? My advice: wait for a
$1.88 video rental....
Sandy Grossmann sandyg@sail.labs.tek.com