[rec.humor.funny] Just Say No

bob@inmet.UUCP (Bob Jordan) (03/31/89)

This was told to me about three years ago by a friend who claims he works with
the father of the "hero" of the story:

During Christmas break from college, the kid wanted to borrow his father's car
to drive to a New Year's Eve party at his fraternity house.  He lived in 
Massachusetts and the fraternity house was in Vermont.  The father needed the 
car New Year's Day, and was concerned about the son hitting one of the 
roadblocks that police set up all over the place on New Year's Eve.  The 
agreement that was reached was that the son would be allowed to use the car, 
but he would not drink at all.  That was, of course, a big mistake on the part 
of the father, especially since the kid wasn't 21.

So he drove to Vermont, got completely trashed, and attempted to drive home.  
Just before he reached Massachusetts he hit a roadblock.  There were a few 
other cars stopped already, so he was told to get out of the car and stand in 
a line of people that were being administered the infamous sobriety test.  
Somehow the policeman skipped him, and he was left standing off to the side 
while the people behind him were showing the police officer how well they 
could touch their finger to their nose, walk a straight line, etc.

At 7:00 AM his father got up to answer the doorbell.  There were two state 
troopers there; one from Vermont and one from Massachusetts.  They immediately
asked him if he was the owner of <description of car>.  He replied, "Yes, I 
am."  One of the policeman asked him if he was driving the car the previous 
evening, and he said that his son had been the driver.  The police officer 
asked to speak to his son.

When the kid found himself in front of the two state troopers, he knew he was 
in some sort of trouble.  But he also realized that his blood alcohol level 
had come down considerably, and that he would pass any test they might give
him.  So upon questioning, he admitted that he was driving the car, that he 
had been in Vermont, but when asked if he had been drinking he said, "No!"  
When the policemen asked if they could see his car, the kid was unable to 
remember the drive, and was worried that he may have hit something or someone.
He said that the car was out back under that car port.

And when the four of them walked out to look at the car, instead of looking at
the car he had driven the night before, there was a Vermont State Police 
cruiser parked there.
--
Bob Jordan
Intermetrics Inc.
Cambridge MA

--
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