jskelly@phoenix.Princeton.EDU (James Stephen Kelly) (04/17/89)
(I don't remember where I heard this, but I don't think it was in church...) During a particularly wet winter, flood waters rise so high in one town that the national guard evacuates all the residents. One man stays behind, however, and when the water is waist-high, two national guardsmen in a boat motor past his house, checking for people left behind. "We're evacuating the town because of the flood! Jump in the boat and we'll carry you to safety!" But the man says, "No, don't bother; I've led a pious life, and the Lord will save me." The men in the boat shrug their shoulders and motor away. Later, when the water level has driven the man onto his roof, another boat appears. "Haven't you heard the town has been evacuated? Come on, we'll save you!" But the man sends them away again, saying "No, no, the Lord will save me!" The water level keeps rising until the man is standing on his chimney and barely keeping his head above water, and a helicopter, doing a final check, appears overhead. It drops a rope, and the loudspeaker says, "Grab the rope and we'll bring you to safety!" But the man waves the helicopter away, once again saying, "No, the Lord will save me!" But the water level keeps rising, and he drowns. When he gets to heaven, he is completely bewildered. He asks God, "God, why didn't you save me?" And God says, "Well, I sent you two boats and a helicopter." -- Edited by Brad Templeton. MAIL, yes MAIL your jokes to funny@looking.UUCP Attribute the joke's source if at all possible. I will reply, mailers willing. Remember: If you POST your joke instead of mailing it, I will not reply.