em2@l.cc.purdue.edu (Mohan Delampady) (09/20/89)
Source: Gurumayi, Spiritual leader There was this farmer who had worked for so many years without desiring anything for himself. Finally one day he developed this urge to possess a horse. He struggled with himself to suppress this desire but did not succeed. He looked around for a horse, did not find one satisfactory, so went to the mountains to see the spiritual leader. To his surprise he saw a horse there. He asked the master if he could have that horse. The master agreed to part with his horse, but told the farmer that the horse was a spiritual horse: To make the horse move ahead you say -- "thank god"; to get the horse gallop away you say -- "thank god, thank god"; to stop the horse you say "thank god, thank god, thank god". The farmer took the horse, climbed it and said "thank god". After getting the hang of riding, he ordered "thank god, thank god". The horse took off in a pace he had never seen before. Soon to his horror he saw that they were approaching a precipice and he had forgotten the key words to stop the horse. He started to pray with all his heart and then finally he remembered the key words. When he finished uttering them they were standing only an inch away from the precipice. He was so happy and so very grateful to the lord that he looked up and uttered the incredible words: "..... ..." -- Mohan (Mohan Delampady, UBC) -- Edited by Brad Templeton. MAIL, yes MAIL your jokes to funny@looking.ON.CA Attribute the joke's source if at all possible. I will reply, mailers willing. If you MUST reply to a rejection, include a description of your joke because there is 0 chance I will remember which one it was.
jimk@fab4.UUCP (11/21/89)
[my brother tells this one] I was sitting behind a car at a stop light the other day and I noticed that it had a bumper sticker that read "Honk if you love Jesus". So I thought about it a bit and since I loved Jesus, I honked my horn. I was very suprised when the driver of the car got out and yelled, "The light is still red you asshole!!!!" got back in the car and drove off through the light which had just turned green. -- Edited by Brad Templeton. MAIL, yes MAIL your jokes to funny@looking.ON.CA Attribute the joke's source if at all possible. I will reply, mailers willing. Remember: If you POST your joke instead of mailing it, I will not reply.