alanc@boulder.UUCP (Alan Craig) (06/08/89)
A sloth was walking through the jungle one day when he was set upon by a gang of vicious snails. The snails left him bleeding and confused at the bottom of a tree where several hours later he summoned the strength to go to the police station and report the assault. He was asked by the desk sergeant to describe his attackers. He replied, "I don't know what they looked like, it all happened so fast". -- Edited by Brad Templeton. MAIL, yes MAIL your jokes to funny@looking.ON.CA Attribute the joke's source if at all possible. I will reply, mailers willing. I reply to all submissions, but about 20% of the replies bounce.
asa@mentor.cc.purdue.edu (Viswamitra T) (12/27/89)
A Geneticist after struggling for 10 years, makes a personal accomplishment one day and goes to Bar to commemorate it that night. He finds himself a quiet corner and orders for a Triple Martini. Meanwhile a gorgeous woman aged about 30 enters the Bar and not finding a table for herself requests the Scientist if she could share the quiet table. The two begin to converse after mutual introductions. Jones: "Mr. Smith, what brought you to this place tonight?" Smith: "Well! After researching for nearly ten years I have accomplished something personal and I am here tonight to enjoy it. And why are YOU here Ms. Jones?" Jones: "I too have a personal accomplishment and I am here to enjoy it too." Smith: "What a Coincidence!!!" "Ms. Jones! May I know what your accomplishment is?" Jones; "Sure. I have been married for about ten years now and I could not have children. But today my doctor told me that I am pregnant." "And what distinguishes your work from others Mr. Smith?" Smith; "I had this rare species of female bird with me and its male counterpart is found no where. In my attempt to save the species after trying to CROSS it with different species of male birds for TEN YEARS, today I was successful in doing it." Jones: "WHAT A COINCIDENCE!!!" -- Edited by Brad Templeton. MAIL, yes MAIL your jokes to funny@looking.ON.CA Attribute the joke's source if at all possible. I will reply, mailers willing. I reply to all submissions, but about 20% of the replies bounce.