ajs@hpfcajs.hp.com (Alan Silverstein) (01/24/90)
ENGLISH RULES OF THUB (sic) 1. Don't use no double negatives. 2. Make each pronoun agree with their antecedents. 3. Join clauses good, like a conjunction should. 4. About them sentence fragments. 5. When dangling, watch your participles. 6. Verbs has got to agree with their subjects. 7. Just between you and i, case is important. 8. Don't write run-on sentences when they are hard to read. 9. Don't use commas, which aren't necessary. 10. Try to not ever split infinitives. 11. It is important to use your apostrophe's correctly. 12. Proofread your writing to see if you any words out. 13. Correct speling is essential. 14. A preposition is something you never end a sentence up with. 15. While a transcendant vocabulary is laudable, one must be eternally careful so that the calculated objective of communication does not become ensconsed in obscurity. 16. Eschew obfuscation. -- Edited by Brad Templeton. MAIL, yes MAIL your jokes to funny@looking.ON.CA Attribute the joke's source if at all possible. I will reply, mailers willing. If you MUST reply to a rejection, include a description of your joke because there is 0 chance I will remember which one it was.