arensb@cvl.umd.edu (Andrew Arensburger) (03/04/90)
A while ago, somebody posted a list of stupid programs, mostly spoofs of other ones. Here's all the followup I could muster. Hacketris: Run around a dungeon, kill monsters, and catch falling shapes. [Distributed by UseNyet] HeX: Typesetter; AuToMaTiCaLlY cApItAlIzEs EvErY oThEr LeTtEr. Requires 7Gb of disk space; more if you want a second font. Must be pronounced "hechhh" (to rhyme with "blechhh"), or else the author will make you read _The_HeXbook_. Also available: MetalFONT, for designing baroque logos for heavy-metal bands.[Written by Donald Newt] Feather: Compresses tape archives. Thus, files can be tarred and feathered. [Standard UnixTM utility] nsh: NutSHell, the smallest UnixTM shell yet. Version 1.0 (the only one released so far) includes only 'cd' and 'echo <string constant>'. GNU-nsh, to be released later this year, is expected to be much more powerful, with built-in Bourne, Korn and C shell emulators. The executable is expected to go from 306 bytes to 7Mb with this release, however. Lightspeed Lisp: Unfortunately, this package will not be released, since the name was deemed to be oxymoronic. X-rated Windows: X-rated windowing package. Includes obscenely-shaped windows, salacious prompts, erotic background patterns, and mouse cursors shaped like genitalia. Perfect for the window user with a twelve-year-old's mind. Warning: susceptible to viruses. And for you legal types out there, an actual quote (typo?) from a University of Utah research paper: "Unix is a registered bell of AT&T trademark laboratories." -- Edited by Brad Templeton. MAIL your jokes (jokes ONLY) to funny@looking.ON.CA Attribute the joke's source if at all possible. I will reply, mailers willing. Remember: Only ONE joke per submission. Extra jokes may be rejected.