[rec.humor.funny] No need for justification

mokry@ctr.columbia.edu (Robert Mokry) (07/12/90)

Do you know what I hate?  I mean what I absolute, positively, despise?
Well, it's these people who write a paragraph with every damn line the
same length (without inserting extra spaces).  It all starts when they
write something and then they suddenly realize, "Hey, all the previous 
lines have the same length!" and then they try to make the rest of the
lines in their paragraph the same length, too, but that makes the rest
of the lines somewhat incomprehensible, and they waste lots of time in
doing it, which they should have spent doing their work.  And finally,
when they are finished, they think that they've accomplished something 
special.  They feel that only their extraordinary grasp of the English
language could create such a masterpiece.  Oooooo, I really hate that.
--
Edited by Brad Templeton.  MAIL your jokes (jokes ONLY) to funny@looking.ON.CA
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davez@ashtate.a-t.com (Dave Zobel) (08/02/90)

You might think		In fact,	An		Really, this
it's difficult,		the size	odd		 whole idea
or that there's		you pick	idea		  is a bit
magic involved,		for your	I had		   silly,
but actually it		lines is	was to		    even
turns out to be		not very	write a		     if
incredibly easy		crucial;	sentence	     it
to make all the		they can	such that	    gets
lines the exact		be short	the length	   people
same length, as		or long.	of each one	  to think
anybody can see		It turns	of the lines	 you have a
after trying to		out that	is just a bit	rare talent.
do it one time.		the long	different from
And all without		ones are	the length of
using a hyphen!		easiest.	the one that
					came before
					it, as you
					see here;
					however,
					I can't
					really
					say a
					lot,
					can
					I?
--
Edited by Brad Templeton.  MAIL your jokes (jokes ONLY) to funny@looking.ON.CA
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Remember: PLEASE spell check and proofread your jokes.  You think I have
time to hand-correct everybody's postings?

raphael@fx.com (Glen Raphael) (08/11/90)

{ed This is the LAST of these I am going to take.}


I really liked the word pictures           If you wish 
that I saw         while reading        to make your word
netnews at         my office the      pictures look as good
other day,         and it seemed     as ours, you might need
like a really great concept, and     to put some effort into
well worth taking       the time      it. It will come only
to come up with a       few more        after you think a
variations. These       are some           good one is
of the ideas that       wouldn't        not possible. But
let me rest until I chose to put      if you do keep at it,
them           down. Really, the     persistence will reward
type           of variation that     you. It takes a careful
THIS           form allows could      eye for words and an
stagger the mind. Perhaps, if we        impressive flair
wanted to, we could        write           for design
messages as a solid        block        to arrange words
of writing in which        words      in this manner. They
can also be read in the spacing!     that try and fail, find
				     that they are still far
				      the wiser from having
         Poetry doesn't really work	made the attempt.
          in this form, as it forces
           changes in word-order that
            can destroy rhythm, as in:

         If I hadn't been delivered
          by Caesarian, I bet that I
           really wouldn't be such an
            antidisestablishmentarian!

	        Then again, maybe I'm just
	         trying a little too hard.
	          I bet somebody out there
	           can write a decent poem
	            with a natural sort of
		     justification, but it
		      may not quite belong
		       in this newsgroup.
		        --Mr. Templeton?

--
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