funnyr@looking.on.ca (Funny Guy) (11/27/90)
The TeleJokeBook
Rec.humor.funny Computer Network Humour Annual
USA & International Ordering Instructions
Volume I: Contains 1987 and 1988, over 700 jokes + 14 cartoons. Light
Bulb jokes, Purity Test & More
Volume II: Contains 1989, over 500 jokes + description of attempts to ban
newsgroup
Volume III: Contains 1990, over 500 jokes + new "True News" chapter.
All books contain 2 chapters of general jokes, plus chapters of Computer
& Science jokes, topical humour, USENET jokes, Classic jokes and Nasty,
evil jokes.
How to order the TeleJokeBooks from inside the USA and overseas:
You can use the mail, or order using my toll free 800 number with a
major credit card. I can send the book to you either by surface
mail (about 2 weeks) or air mail (just over 1 week) as you choose.
If you order by mail, mail a check or money order to:
(Make check payable to ClariNet Communications Corp.)
Jokebook
c/o ClariNet Communications Corp
124 King St. N.
Waterloo, ON
N2J 2X8
Canada
Please include a mailing label for the return package. A stick on label
would be great, but a plain cut piece of paper would be fine. In your
order, include the number of copies you want, how you want them shipped,
and your EMAIL address in case there's any problem.
Toll Free Ordering
You can dial 1-800-USE-NETS (800-873-6387) from within the USA to order.
(Outside, dial 1-519-884-7473) This 800 number does not exist just for the
jokebook, so please try to keep it short so I can keep my costs down.
When you call, between 10 AM and 5 PM Eastern Standard Time, please have
ready with you:
- The type, card number and expiry date of your credit card.
(MasterCard, Visa or American Express) Also give your name here
if it's being mailed to a different person. We prefer MasterCard
if you have a choice.
- The name and address to ship the book to.
- The number of books and type of shipping.
- Your EMAIL address in case there's any problem.
P R I C E S
Volume III Volume II Volume I ALL
1990 1989 1987 & 1988 THREE
$9.95 USD $9.95 USD $13 USD $29.95 USD
$11.60 CDN $11.60 CDN $15 CDN $34.95 CDN
Special: 2 or more Volume III, deduct $1 per book!
Shipping & Handling: (in USD to the USA -- Canadians see Canadian posting)
Volume II,III Volume I
Air Mail (to the USA only)
1 $3 $4
2 $6 $7
3 $8 $9
4 $9 $10
All Three $8
Surface Mail (USA or overseas)
1 $2 $2
2 $4 $4
3 $4 $5
4-5 $5 $5
6 $5 $7
All Three $5
Air Mail (overseas)
1 $7 $7
5 $22
6 $22
All Three $15
For combinations of the books or unusual quantities we will bill you an
amount based on the actual postage and similar algorithm to that used above.
Or e-mail for an exact quote.
*** Here's the tricky part. If you order by credit card, you will be billed
in Canadian dollars. Your bank will do an exchange for you and bill you
in U.S. dollars. The current rate in the paper is around $0.86 USD = $1 CAN.
We will convert the shipping charges above at the going rate and add it to
your credit card Canadian dollar total.
You can also order by E-MAIL if you are brave enough to include your credit
card information in non-secure USENET mail. Mail the order form below to
jokebook@looking.on.ca. (Actually, if you're near UUNET or other major
sites it's probably fairly safe -- you can contest any non-signed credit
card billing anyway -- but I make *no* guarantees about the security of
net E-mail) Note as well that sending orders via the internet may violate
internet use guidelines in some sections of that net.
If no other way is available to you, you can FAX credit card information,
your name, address, quantity of books and shipping method to 1-519-886-9495.
Put "Attn: Jokebook" on the FAX.
Sorry, we can't C.O.D. over the border.
Australians: A bulk order is being arranged. Watch for news!
======================================================================
Order Form (for electronic, fax or mailed credit card orders)
Mail to "jokebook@looking.on.ca" via commerce-valid E-mail path.
Name: ________________
Address: ________________
________________
______
Name on Credit Card ( if gift ): ____________
Card Type: XxxxxxXxxx
Card Number: xxxx xxxx xxxx xxxx
Expires: xxxx
Vol I Books: 0 ## US$ 13.00 CDN$ 15.00
Vol II Books: 0 ## US$ 9.95 CDN$ 11.60
Vol III Books: 1 ## US$ 9.95 CDN$ 11.60
Shipping Style: Surface/Air
EMAIL Address or telno: _____