dreich%ece@ucsd.edu (Darrell Reich) (02/08/91)
Darrell the banjo picker's canonical list of Banjo Jokes... (you've been warned) approved for all audiences o How many banjo players does it take to screw in a light bulb? five; one to screw it in and four to (a.) complain that it's electric. (b.) lament about how much they miss the old one. (c.) stand around and watch. o What's the difference between a banjo and a(n)... (a.) onion no one cries when you cut up a banjo. (b.) uzzie an uzzie only repeats forty times. (c.) chain saw a chain saw has a dynamic range. and/or you can turn a chainsaw off. (d.) Harley Davidson motorcycle you can tune a Harley. (e.) Trampoline you take your shoes off to jump on a trampoline. o Playing the banjo is a lot like throwing a javelin blindfolded...you don't have to be very good to get people's attention. o What do you say to the banjo player in the three piece suit? Will the defendant please rise. o What do you get when you throw a banjo and an accordion off the Empire State Building? Who Cares... o What do you call twenty-five banjos up to their necks in sand? not enough sand. o What do you call one-hundred banjos at the bottom of the ocean? a good start. o What did the banjo player get on his IQ (or SAT) test? drool... o Why do some people take an instant aversion to banjo players? it saves time in the long run. o What will you never say about a banjo player? that's the banjo player's porsche. o Banjo players are a lot like sharks--they think they have to keep playing or they will sink... o How can you tell the difference between all the banjo songs? by there names...(used to be Irish fiddle tunes) o The sixth fret on a banjo is a lot like the thirteenth floor on a building you don't really need one. o Does this kinder, gentler era have room for another generation of obnoxious banjo pickers telling dumb jokes and playing fast? (zombiegrass--picture a banjo picker standing straight faced under a large cowboy hat...) -- Edited by Brad Templeton. MAIL your jokes (jokes ONLY) to funny@looking.ON.CA Attribute the joke's source if at all possible. A Daemon will auto-reply. Remember: PLEASE spell check and proofread your jokes. You think I have time to hand-correct everybody's postings?