[comp.lang.postscript] Yer all a bunch of cretins

richard@gryphon.CTS.COM (Richard Sexton) (07/02/88)

Recently I posted a request for help in enabling my PostScript printer
to image on the whole area of a legal sized piece of paper.

I got one piece of email saying: ``Let me know what you find''.

Ok, so I called Adobe. I went something like this:

``Hello, Adobe systems, can I help you ?''

``Yes, technical support please''

``For what product ?''

(I said to myself at this point, *what product ?*, what do they do,
sell car wax as well - oh yeah, there's that Illustrator thing)

``PostScript''

``One moment sir'

[nice muzak comes on in an attempt to sooth my ragged sleepless nerves]

``Hello may I help you''

``yeah, hi, I'm trying to get my PS pronter to image on an entire piece
of legal paper, it's clipping to within the limits of an  8 1/2 x 11"
piece of paper''.

``Oh, well you have to exit the server loop and....'''

``Huh ? Server loop''

``Uhh, yes, well maybe you could just run LaserPrep, there should be a 
setting for it''

``Huh ? LaserPrep ? Whats that ?''

``Sir, do you have an Mac or an IBM''

``Uhh, I have an Amiga''

[silence]

``Hello ?''

``Uh, yes sir I'm still here. Uh, what kind of printer is this''

``QMS PS-800''

``You need to call QMS sir, to fond out what they've called lagal sized
paper.''

``No can do, they're closed and I need it tonight''

``Well, let me see if I can find the perosn who knows about QMS printers
around here''

[dum de dum, dee do oh dee dee oh]

``Hello, this is Henry Gross, can I help you''

``Yeah, hi Henry, I'm trying to image on the entire area of a legal sized
piece of paper and it's clipping to within letter sized paper''

``Right, you need to tell it it's legal sized paper''

``Right. How do I do that''

``Well, what a[pplication are you runing''

(embarassed) ``vi ? I'm just sort of writing PostScript''

``Best way sir. Now what you need is the legal operator I think it' sin
statusdictdef or maybe it's in userdictdef...''

``It's in userdictdef, I tried using the output from a DTP package
and although it didnt work, it did indicate that it was in userdictdef''

``Right. It's in userdictdef. So there you have it''

``Wait a minute. Have what, all I knoe is there is a legal operator, what do
I do with it ? set oit true, make it known, what''

``Uhh, just put the world legal anywhere before the showpage''

``Oh shit. Thats all ?''

``Yes sir''.

What a dork I am. Good god.
I put in a _legal_ before the showpage and it printed a blank page. I moved it
to the beginning and it worked fine.

What also impressed me, besides how easy this was to do, is that this is the
first time I've called a tech support dept qand I didnt get a "what
is your serial number, sir" line of questions.

Thanks Henry. We met our deadline.


-- 
      If you were to flatten out Wales, it would be bigger than England.
richard@gryphon.CTS.COM                               {backbone}!gryphon!richard