[comp.society] BBSing and socialization

SHAD40@UOFMCC.BITNET (Mark Roseman) (12/15/87)

Shane Dunne wrote of how he perceived the effect of computer bulletin
board systems (BBS) to be negative with respect to shy people.  As a
"serious" (one must of course be careful with the wording, as they are
primarily for fun, or at least those on a local level) user of such
systems, I'd like to throw in a few comments and observations.

Basically, I feel about the opposite.  I would agree however about the
initial profile of many users.  The average person who begins calling
a BBS is likely to be about 14-16 years old, and very shy.  It is
worth noting at this point though, that (at least on the systems
here), there are users who are anywhere from 6 years old to 40 and
older, many who are anything but shy, many who know no more about
computers than finding the on switch, and who are anything but the
stereotypical "geeks".

Now, taking said 15 year old shy person, he (I would guess about 85%
of users here are male) starts logging on to a system.  From there, he
begins interacting with the users, either via sending messages about
others messages, stating their own opinion, or by electronic
"chatting" with others.  Usually, the person is still anonymous.

After a while, the user becomes more and more comfortable getting
along with people on the electronic level.  One large segment of the
BBS community here tends to get together every weekend -- regular
meeting spot, etc.  Not everyone shows up everytime of course, and it
is not all the users who show up by any means.  However, people are
always invited to these get-togethers (usually begun at a centrally
located donut shop).

So, along comes our 15 year old user, very apprehensively of course,
and meets all these people.  He starts coming regularly to these
things, and gets involved with many of the people (there being a
number of really nice people that age being involved in this group).
In the end, the user has made several new "real" friends.

Basically, I can't think of very many cases where a user has come on
in a totally anonymous fashion and hasn't become known to the others
within a relatively short time.

So, just thought I'd throw this in then, speaking from first hand
experience.  I was apprehensive when I first got into BBSing -- I
bought my modem for school work, and didn't try out BBSing for a long
time, because of my fears that most people would be a bunch of 15 year
old technoid geeks and social outcasts.  Well, there are some of
those, but the majority are not.  I don't regret (too often) getting
involved with these systems.

                                 -- Mark