JIM@AUVM.BITNET ("Jim McIntosh") (01/12/89)
After all the recent stress, a little humor may help keep things in
perspective :-O
----------------------------Original message----------------------------
Forwarded from the VirusBoard BBS at (225) 617-0862:
Date: 11-31-88 (24:60) Number: 32769
To: ALL Refer#: NONE
>From: ROBERT MORRIS III Read: (N/A)
Subj: VIRUS ALERT Status: PUBLIC MESSAGE
Warning: There's a new virus on the loose that's worse than anything I've
seen before! It gets in through the power line, riding on the powerline
60 Hz subcarrier. It works by changing the serial port pinouts, and by
reversing the direction one's disks spin. Over 300,000 systems have been
hit by it here in Murphy, West Dakota alone! And that's just in the last
twelve minutes.
It attacks DOS, Unix, TOPS-20, Apple II, VMS, MVS, Multics, Mac, RSX-11,
ITS, CMS, TRS-80, and VHS systems.
To prevent the spread of this dastardly worm:
1) Don't use the powerline.
2) Don't use batteries either, since there are rumors that this virus has
invaded most major battery plants and is infecting the positive poles
of the batteries. (You might try hooking up just the negative pole.)
3) Don't upload or download files.
4) Don't store files on floppy disks or hard disks.
5) Don't read messages. Not even this one!
6) Don't use serial ports, modems, or phone lines.
7) Don't use keyboards, screens, or printers.
8) Don't use switches, CPUs, memories, microprocessors, or mainframes.
9) Don't use electric lights, electric or gas heat or airconditioning,
running water, writing, fire, clothing, or the wheel.
I'm sure if we are all careful to follow these 9 easy steps, this virus
can be eradicated, and the precious electronic fluids of our computers
can be kept pure.
--RTM III