jfh@rpp386.Dallas.TX.US (The Beach Bum) (10/20/88)
This is something I recently found which had been laying around on a disk
for many years. It was funny at the time ...
[ Disclaimer - This was NOT originally written by me. So far as I can
tell, the original author was A.J. Gonzales. Later work was done by
myself and Gus Michel ]
--
THE HOLY BABBLE
PERVERSED STANDARD VISION
THIRD EDITION
In the beginning Tandy created the TRS-80 Model I. The machine was
without an ad campaign or a fanatic following. And darkness lay
upon the faces of the store managers.
And Tandy said, "Let us sell this computer to all manner of persons
both rich and poor." And Tandy saw that the ad campaign was good.
So Tandy caused the TRS-80 Model I to have core in the amount of 4K
and the masses did buy the computer for it was good. Later the expansion
interface was caused to exist and core was available in amounts up to
64K. And so it was, there was morning and evening, one day.
And Tandy said "Let there be a high-level language for the masses
to program in." And Microsoft caused the BASIC interpreter to exist
and the people saw that it was good and they rejoiced for BASIC was
easy to learn. That was morning and evening, a second day.
And Tandy said "Let there be applications programs for the non-hackers
to use." And many applications programs were caused to exist for
the hackers were many and they all needed money for their Model I's.
Tandy saw that the people were happy and sales were increasing and they
rejoiced for CB radios had gone away. There was morning and evening,
a third day.
And Tandy saw that the users had no way to store and transmit data.
So Tandy said "Let there be all manner of peripherals." And the floppy
disks and line printers were created. And later the modems were made
so that the users could reach out and touch someone. And Tandy saw
that it was good for now the users could start users groups and convert
more people to the cause of silicon based hardware. That was morning
and evening, a fourth day.
Tandy saw that the users were becoming tired of their Model I which
ran so slowly. So Tandy said "Let there be all manner of faster models
for the fanatics to use when they have big jobs to run." And the new
models were created. There was the Model II and III for the users of
BASIC. The Model 12 and 16 for the users of COBOL and assembly. There
were even pocket and color computers for the players of games.
There was morning and evening, a fifth day.
And Tandy saw that the store managers were now over worked and tired.
So Tandy said "Let the Computer Centers exist to sell the computers and
let the store managers not be worked so hard for they have made the stock
holders rich." And so it was, morning and evening, a sixth day.
And on the seventh day Tandy saw that everyone was happy. The users had
computers for their computing and games playing. And the hackers had users
to write applications programs for to pay for their new Model 12's and 16's.
Even the stock holders were happy for they could now afford more things
with their dividend checks. So Tandy rested and saw that his creation was
good. That was morning and evening, a seventh day.
And Tandy said "Let us remember the seventh day and let no Tandy person
work on this day, but instead play games and rejoice in their good fortune."
And so it was that the games are stilled played and the programs are still
written by all manner of persons.
These are the words of the creation of the TRS-80 Model I. This is the
system that Tandy hath made. Let us rejoice and be glad that we don't
own Apples, which still run slowly and do not have alot of core.
--
John F. Haugh II +----Make believe quote of the week----
VoiceNet: (214) 250-3311 Data: -6272 | Nancy Reagan on Richard Stallman:
InterNet: jfh@rpp386.Dallas.TX.US | "Just say `Gno'"
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