u563694848ea@deneb.ucdavis.edu (0040;0000004804;0;250;141;) (02/21/89)
Are you getting tired of the same old monsters on Bard's Tale III? Are you sick of casting the same old spells over and over again? Are you running out of new places to explore? Then we have the game for you! Monster Vending Machine! FEATURING: - Three billion monsters! Each monster you maim or slaughter screams horribly in hundreds of ways! Each monster can hold up to five virgin maidens prisoner! - Five trillion magic items! - Two hundred billion new spells, including the infamous "Diverging demon summons" - 500 new magic users! Including: o Unixmancer: You only need to type ONE key to cast a spell! Warning: everything is case sensitive, so be careful. o faerymancer: Close your eyes, imagine what spell you want to cast, and the game automatically casts it for you! o geomancer: Use the earth to harness energy o aeromancer: The sky is your domain o hydromancer: Water is your friend o tartarmancer: Beat those monsters into submission by causing their mouths to be infested with painful cavities! o crestmancer: sworn enemy of the tartarmancers - Three quadrillion levels of dungeons to explore! Four million planets and three hundred billion cities to sack, pillage, plunder, ravage, destroy, annihilate, etc. Buy the Best! Forget the rest! No other game has so many monsters to kill and spells to cast! The fact is, Bard's Tale and the rest of the competition does not even have a fraction of the amount of mindless gratuitous violence that we have painstakingly developed. Coming REAL SOON NOW to a personal computer near you: MONSTER VENDING MACHINE! Over 9000 man-years in the making! Available on 480 double sided floppies for ALL seven and thirteen bit computers! Developed and designed on a G.E. ToastMaster //C+EnhancedSE++