reintom@rocky2.UUCP (Tom Reingold) (09/08/86)
A Guide to Effective Scientific Communication
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Phrase Translation
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It has long been known I haven't bothered to look up
the reference
It is believed I think
It is generally believed A couple of guys think so too
It is not unreasonable to If you believe this, you'll
assume believe anything
Of great theoretical importance I find it kind of interesting
Of great practical importance I can get some mileage out of it
Typical results are shown The best results are shown
3 samples were chosen for further The others didn't make sense, so
study we ignored them
The 4 hour sample was not studied I dropped it on the floor
The 4 hour determination may not I dropped it on the floor, but
be significant scooped most of it up
The significance of these results Look at the pretty artifact
is unclear
It has not been possible to The experiment was negative, but at
provide definitive answers least I can publish the data
somewhere
Correct within an order of Wrong
magnitude
It might be argued that I have such a good answer for this
objection that I shall now
raise it
Much additional work will be This paper is not very good, but neither
required is that of anyone else
These investigations proved My grant is going to be renewed
highly rewarding
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Written by: Anonymous
Posted by: Tom Reingold
UUCP:
seismo|
philabs|
phri| -> cmcl2!rna!rocky2!reintom
harvard|
ihnp4|
ARPANET: reintom@rockefeller.arpa
BITNET: REINTOM@ROCKVAXedh@kunivv1.UUCP (Edward Hoenkamp) (09/13/86)
May I suggest to add one line to the scientific non-sequiturs translation table posted by reintom@rocky2.UUCP (Tom Reingold @ Rockefeller Univ)? I think the phrase 'Anonymus' should translate into 'I haven't bothered to look up the reference' too. This table, another one like this, and many entertaining/informative stories by/about scientific geniuses/quacks can be found in "A Random Walk in Science'. (refer to your local bookseller, I didn't bother to look up the publisher).