keithl@tekcad.UUCP (07/03/83)
Here are most of the words of three songs from the "Meaning of Life"
by Monty Python.
The Galaxy Song
Every Sperm is Sacred
Christmas in Heaven
I haven't seen these on the net yet, although there was a request
some months back. These are transcribed from the album. The last
two songs are not obscene but are definitely sacrilegious. These
songs are submitted without permission, probably in violation of
innumerable laws, and a number of axioms.
THE GALAXY SONG (Eric Idle + John du Prez)
Whenever life gets you down, Mrs. Brown,
and things seem hard or tough,
and people are stupid, obnoxious, or daft,
and you feel that you've had quite enough...
Just remember that you're standing on a planet that's evolving
and revolving at nine hundred miles an hour,
that's orbiting at ninety miles a second, so it's reckoned,
a Sun that is the source of all our power.
The Sun and you and me, and all the stars that we can see,
are moving at a million miles a day,
in an outer spiral arm at forty thousand miles an hour
of a galaxy we call the Milky Way.
Our galaxy itself contains a hundred billion stars.
It's a hundred thousand light years side to side.
It bulges in the middle sixteen thousand light years thick,
but out by us it's just three thousand light years wide.
We're thirty thousand light years from galactic central point.
We go 'round every two hundred million years.
And out galaxy is one of millions of billions
in this amazing and expanding universe.
The universe itself keeps on expanding and expanding
in all of the directions it can whiz;
as fast as it can go, the speed of light you know,
twelve million miles a minute and that's the fastest speed there is.
So remember when you're feeling very small and insecure,
how amazingly unlikely is your birth.
And pray that there's intelligent life somewhere up in space,
'cause there's bugger all down here on Earth!
*** And now, for something completely tasteless ***
EVERY SPERM IS SACRED (Michael Palin & Terry Jones)
There are Jews in the world, there are Buddhists,
there are Hindus and Mormons and then
there are those that follow Mohammed -but-
I've never been one of them.
I am a Roman Catholic
and have been since before I was born,
and the one thing they say about Catholics is
they'll take you as soon as you're warm.
You don't have to be a six-footer.
You don't have to have a great brain.
You don't have to have any clothes on, you're
a Catholic the moment dad came
...Because...
Every sperm is sacred,
every sperm is great,
If a sperm is wasted,
God gets quite irate. (2x)
Let the heathens spill theirs,
on the dusty ground.
God shall make them pay for
each sperm that can't be found.
Every sperm is wanted,
every sperm is good.
Every sperm is needed,
in your neighborhood.
Hindu, Taoist, Mormon,
spill theirs just anywhere
but God loves those who treat their
semen with more care.
(misc choruses)
Every sperm is useful,
every sperm is fine.
God needs everybodies,
mine, and mine, and mine.
Let the pagans spill theirs
on mountain hill and plain.
God shall strike them down for
each sperm that's spilled in vain.
(misc. choruses and finale)
CHRISTMAS IN HEAVEN (Eric Idle + ???)
Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, it's truly a real honorable
experience to be here this evening. A very wonderful and warm and
emotional moment for all of us - and I'd like to sing a song for all
of you...
It's Christmas in Heaven, all the children sing.
It's Christmas in Heaven, hark hark those church bells ring.
It's Christmas in Heaven, the snow falls from the sky.
But it's nice and warm, and everyone looks smart and wears a tie.
It's Christmas in Heaven, there's great films on TV.
The Sound of Music twice an hour and Jaws one, two and three.
There's gifts for all the family, there's toiletries and drapes(?),
there's (garbled) and (garbled) and less video games.
It's Christmas, it's Christmas in Heaven!
Hip-hip, hip-hip-hip hooray!
Every single day, is Christmas day!
It's Christmas, it's Christmas, it's Christmas in Heaven!
Hip-hip, hip-hip-hip, hip-hip-hip hooray!
(fades)
***********
Perhaps someone else can figure out the garbled parts.
If this is received well, I'll transcribe the lyrics of the restaurant
scene with monsieur.
Yours in Pythonery,
--
Keith Lofstrom
uucp: {ucbvax,decvax,chico,pur-ee,cbosg,ihnss}!teklabs!tekcad!keithl
CSnet: keithl@tek
ARPAnet:keithl.tek@rand-relaytim@unc.UUCP (07/05/83)
Once again, I must protest the illegal and immoral posting of copyrighted material to the net. The Monty Python song lyrics posted were very funny -- that is why I had enough respect for the writers of the songs to BUY the book containing the lyrics, instead of ripping them off. The lyrics are NOT in the public domain. Posting them as if they were in the public domain is theft. The members of Monty Python make their livings off book sales, among other things; by reducing people's incentive to buy the book, you are stealing from them as surely as stealing their royalty checks. Have some respect -- if you wrote a program for you wished to retain the rights and from which you hoped to make money, I wouldn't post it to net.sources. ______________________________________ The overworked keyboard of Tim Maroney duke!unc!tim (USENET) tim.unc@udel-relay (ARPA) The University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill
TOPAZ:fantods@ucbvax.UUCP (07/11/83)
Putting Monty Python song lyrics on the net as theft? That may be...but I'm not going to buy the book, I paid to see the movie, and if I walk around singing the songs to people and they decide to go see the movie, isn't that free publicity for MP? Shouldn't they pay me for singing those very lyrics that I found on the net? They could at least send me a free book, although I hate their books. I'd much rather buy the soundtrack album, and by George, I think I will.
leimkuhl@uiuccsb.UUCP (07/19/83)
#R:tekcad:-48700:uiuccsb:10000002:000:811 uiuccsb!leimkuhl Jul 18 13:52:00 1983 It is entirely a civil matter if someone posts copyrighted material on the net. It is not illegal!!! The person submitting the protected writings may face civil NOT CRIMINAL penalties, and in any case, the owner (or owners) must determine that it is worth his time and effort to take the matter to court--usually this means that there is evidence that the violation of copyright was made in order to gain some economic benefit (i.e. to re-sell). If you take the trouble to point out who owns the material and that it is copy- righted, I doubt that you run a great risk of litigation. Of course it is always best to ask first (permission to copy is nearly always granted since it is, in effect, free advertising). I would like to hear some lawyers' opinions on this (if there are any out there). -Ben