lauren@vortex.UUCP (Lauren Weinstein) (02/13/84)
Greetings! I'll bet you've all been wondering about the results
of Vortex Film Quiz #1. Hell, I was even showing movies at
UniForum, but you never got the answers! The original answers
were actually posted to the net quite sometime ago, but were
lost to most of the network due to a disk crash at a primary site.
I was unaware of this situation for quite awhile. By the time I found
out what was going on, all of my contest data had moved offline to tape.
I restored the tape, but by that time decvax (my primary netnews feed)
was having problems and was not accepting news articles for submission.
Anyway, all's well that ends well, I guess. Sooooooooo...
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The number of entries to the contest was quite enormous. I was quite
impressed by the many correct answers, and at the same time
surprised that nobody guessed one of the titles and only a couple
of entries correctly guessed several others that I had thought were
pretty easy. On the other hand, some of the ones I thought were pretty
difficult were guessed correctly by a number of people. A few of the
guesses that were made in some cases were wrong, but plenty amusing
nonetheless!
As I just implied, no entry correctly guessed all 25 titles. The most
correct entries were submitted by the "MIT Lecture Series Committee"
(the entry was mailed by mit-eddie!mp) with 21 correct answers. I don't
know how many people are included in this committee, by the way.
The rules of the contest specified that the winner would be a single
person, so this group entry cannot compete for the contest prize.
(Please note, however, that group entries to my contests are always
invited, so long as they are clearly marked as such. They won't win the
prize, but they will always be mentioned when they have a very large number
of correct answers.)
The next most correct answers was from another group entry, this one
mailed by utcsrgv!oscar on behalf of himself (Oscar Nierstrasz) and
Steve Hull. They had 15 correct answers out of the total 25. Once again,
since this was a group entry, it cannot win the prize, but good work!
The actual winner of the contest, by virtue of having the most correct
answers for an individual was fortune!glossman, who had 14 correct answers.
Congratulations!!!
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So, that about does it. Another Vortex Film Quiz will be appearing soon,
and hopefully there won't be such a lag to get the results next time!
Is there anything I've forgotten? Oh yes...
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VORTEX FILM QUIZ #1
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*** ANSWERS ***
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[Text immediately under the dashed lines is a continuation from the
film in question of the original contest text.]
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1) Feed me! I want fooood!
Audrey, the talking plant in LITTLE SHOP OF HORRORS,
mentions that it's feeding time.
2) Oh, the girl who'll kiss on the very first date is usually
a hussy, and the girl who waits 'till the second time out is
anything but fussy...
---
... but the girl who waits 'till the third time around, head
in the clouds, feet on the ground, she's the one you're glad
you found, she's your shepoopee!
Artemus, friend of Harold Hill, sings at an
outdoor gathering in THE MUSIC MAN.
3) Somebody pulled my tail!
---
You pulled it yourself!
The Cowardly Lion in THE WIZARD OF OZ accidently pulls his
own tail through nervousness.
4) "Do you expect me to talk?"
"No [Mr. Bond], I expect you to die!"
James Bond, agent 007, is strapped spread-eagled to
a metal platform, with a large industrial laser beam
gradually moving up between his legs. He discusses
the situation with nearby GOLDFINGER.
5) When we met in 1948, it was November...
---
When I said that I would be his mate, it was December.
I reasoned he, would be, the greatest husband that a girl had ever found.
That's what I reasoned.
That's what I reasoned.
Then April rolled around...
Joe's wife in DAMN YANKEES bemoans her husband's
obsession with baseball.
6) When the plumber Zabladowski has installed the last sink,
I want him disintegrated.
---
I want him disintegrated slowly. I want him to suffer.
Atom by atom. At dawn!
Evil Dr. Terwilliger discusses his plans for an
"independent contracter" whom he had hired to install
some sinks for the "Terwilliger Institute", in the
superb 5000 FINGERS OF DR. T.
7) It's not we're antisocial; we're only antiwork!
The "Jets" sing their point of view after an
"intrusion" by Officer Krupke in WEST SIDE STORY.
8) It's just a jump to the left...
The Professor/Moderator, and the Transylvanian
Coventioneers, sing the first step for dancing
the "Time Warp" in THE ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW.
This was an *easy* one.
9) ... but whoever took him was very sophisticated and
dangerous -- they took the whole booth!
Two spies discuss the possible whereabouts of
Dr. Schaeffer after he vanishes while attempting
to place a phone call from a lonely booth.
They realize that he was kidnapped by "TPC"
(The Phone Company) in THE PRESIDENT'S ANALYST.
10) She turned me into a newt!
---
I got better...
A villager accuses a woman of causing him medical
problems in MONTY PYTHON AND THE HOLY GRAIL.
11) 7 1/2 cents, doesn't mean a heck of a lot...
---
7 1/2 cents, doesn't mean a thing.
But give it to me every hour,
40 hours every week,
That's enough for me to be,
Living like a king.
I figured it out!
The union workers of the Sleep Tight Pajama company
sing their demand for a raise at a union meeting in
THE PAJAMA GAME.
12) I'm wearing a cardboard belt!
Theatrical producer Max Bialystock explains his financial
situation to accountant Leo Bloom in Mel Brooks' classic
THE PRODUCERS.
13) The gun is good. The penis is evil.
---
The penis shoots seeds and makes new life to poison the Earth with
a plague of men, as once it was. But the gun shoots death and purifies
the Earth of the filth of brutals. Go forth, and kill.
The giant stone head in ZARDOZ tells "the exterminators"
the "facts of life."
14) How tall was King Kong?
---
Three foot six...
Fugitive Raymond answers Director Eli's question concerning
the fantasy of the movies in the excellent film, THE STUNT MAN.
15) Monsters from the Id!
The Captain tells Morbius the nature of the force which destroyed
the Krell civilization, in the MGM classic FORBIDDEN PLANET.
(This film introduced the popular "Robbie the Robot" who still shows
up on television from time to time.)
16) Bring me back her heart -- in this!
The Evil Queen in Disney's animated SNOW WHITE AND THE SEVEN DWARFS
demands proof from her henchman that he has actually killed Snow White.
Boo! Hiss! This film, the first feature length animated movie, made
in the late 30's, is still in my opinion the finest animated film
ever produced.
17) Boy, I wish we had one of those doomsday machines...
General Turgeson, while listening to Dr. Strangelove's explanation of
"The Doomsday Machine" in the War Room, wishes the U.S. could get one
of its own, in DR.STRANGELOVE OR HOW I LEARNED TO STOP WORRYING AND
LOVE THE BOMB. A true classic by Stanley Kramer.
18) "See you soon... idi.. idi..."
"Idiot. It's for you!"
Nobody correctly guessed this one. I personally didn't think it
was particularly difficult, but oh well...
Blondie ("The Good") and Tuko ("The Ugly") in THE GOOD, THE BAD,
AND THE UGLY, find a note left behind for them by "Angel Eyes"
("The Bad"). Tuko tries to read the note, but Blondie finishes
it for him.
19) I go to funerals.
Harold Chasen in HAROLD AND MAUDE explains his favorite hobby to
his shrink. An extremely easy identification.
20) Oh, once upon a lookin' for Donna time, there was a
16 year old virgin...
---
Oh Donna, oh oh Donna, oh oh oh -- Lookin' for my Donna...
Burger, a member of "The Tribe" in HAIR, sings of love and
destiny. I remember seeing the live theatrical version of this
production in the Aquarius theater in Hollywood sometime around
1968. Remember 1968? Remember love and peace and stuff like that?
21) Gort, baringa.
Easy! This line is used twice in Robert Wise's fine THE DAY
THE EARTH STOOD STILL. In the first case, the space traveler,
"Klattu", uses it to command the robot, "Gort", to open the ship.
In the second case (at the end of the film) he uses it to basically
mean, "Let's get out of here..." when he's ready to leave.
This line is not as well known as the popular "Klattu Barada Nickto"
line (which itself translates roughly to, "Don't bother destroying
the Earth".)
22) Food, glorious food!
---
We're anxious to try it!
The children in the Workhouse sing about the one thing of which they
constantly dream in OLIVER!
23) We are all interested in the future, for that is where you
and I will be spending the rest of our lives.
"Criswell" speaks of deep philosophical concepts in the opening
of the well-known "turkey" SF film, PLAN 9 FROM OUTER SPACE.
24) Terminate her -- immediately!
The General is slightly upset to learn that the Princess lied
regarding the location of the rebel base in STAR WARS.
This should have been an easy one, but was correctly identified
by fewer entries than I expected.
25) Never trust a rich spy!
Now, I thought that this was the hardest one, but a number of entries
identified it correctly. Agent Vesper points out an important
fact to Mr. Trimble (just before shooting him with her bagpipe
machine gun) in the excellent spy spoof CASINO ROYALE.
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END OF VORTEX FILM QUIZ #1
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--Lauren--