SEWALL@UCONNVM.BITNET (06/28/87)
The following is "echoing" around the World on Fidonet...
Date: 21 Jun 87 21:46:00
From: Chris Gaal
THE SMORGAS-BOARD Monroeville, PA 412-733-3010 (129/32)
Subj: FILE TRANSFER PROTOCOLS
Late at nite, I was talking with a friend, Roger Agrawala of 129/30, and he
gave me inspiration while I came up with and typed in this.....
Based on the existing KERMIT protocol, we have developped a whole line of
MUPPET protocols!!!!
Fozzie Protocol
ACK=wACKa wACKa wACKa!
EOT=End of tomatoes
NAK=A funny thing happened today when. . .
The Count Protocol
NAK=Count the number of blocks in the file
ACK=(block # said enthusiatically)
EOT=(last block number, 1 second pause,
block number IN filename, hahaha [diablocical laughter])
The Dr. Honedeydue and Beaker Protocol
NAK=Watch my assistant Beaker perform this file transfer
ACK=Bee-dee bee-dee bee-dee-bee-bee
EOT=(smoke coming out of modem) bee-dee-bee-be-be-be-be-be
The Piggy Protocol
* Note, this is a "front-end" designed to act as a lead-in to
the already existing Kermit protocol
NAK=Oh, Kermit!
There are so many of these protocols running around, like XMODEM, YMODEM,
ZMODEM, XMODEM BATCH, YMODEM BATCH, ZMODEM BATCH, KERMITT,
SEALINK, WINDOWED XMODEM, TELINK, COMPUSERVE B, MODEM 7, and many, many
more, we decided to come up with a few of our own!
TV Show Protocols:
The Star Trek Protocol
NAK=Space. The final frontier for man.
ACK=Highly illogical data block!
EOT=Beam us up!
The Monty Python Protocol
NAK=And now for something completely different. . .
ACK=It's!
EOT=Oh, my brain hurts!!!
The Ficticious character protocols:
The Church Police Protocol
SendNAK=Are you the Church Police
RecvNAK=Hoooohhh, yes!
ACK=One dead, unjugged, rabbit fish later
SendEOT=The society's to blame!
RecvEOT=Right! We'll arrest them instead!
The Bob and Doug Mackensie protocol
NAK=Good day, eh?
ACK=More beer, doughnuts, and backbacon sandwiches, eh?
EOT=Take off, you hoser!
The Archie Bunker Protocol
NAK=Get out of the chair, Meathead
ACK=Awww, sheeze, Edith!
EOT=Stifle yourself, ding-bat!
The Hitchhiker protocols:
The Marvin the Paranoid Android Protocol
NAK=I'll have you know I'm feeling terribly depressed today.
ACK=Another door!
EOT=Life. Don't talk to me about life!
The Zaphod Protocol
NAK=That's such a nice file, I might steal it!
ACK=Err, next block.
EOT=Wow.hayes@wizard.ucsd.edu (James Hayes) (06/30/87)
SEWALL@UCONNVM.BITNET writes in article <8706272131.aa21689@SMOKE.BRL.ARPA>: > The Piggy Protocol > * Note, this is a "front-end" designed to act as a lead-in to > the already existing Kermit protocol > NAK=Oh, Kermit! Sorry, thats: NAK=Oh, Kermie! My own protocols I'm putting into DCOM PRODOS: The Church Lady Protocol (With apologies to Saturday Night Live.) NAK= That was such a nasty block! What made you send that? Well, I might have an idea... No, that's not him... Oh, I don't know, maybe, perhaps, SATAN? ACK= Oh, I see that some of us think it's ok to send a packet when it's CONVIENENT... Isn't that SPECIAL. EOT= It's time for my special dance. HIT IT PEARL! The IBM protocol: NAK= The packet did not arrive after the 4.33 micro second time period that I was waiting for it. Please submit form 3-40-94.39 to you system administrator and place a call to IBM service at 1-800-BAD-INFO. Please send the NAK2 packet indicating your acceptance of this NAK. ACK= The packet #493.32 arrived after a brief but fulfilling 2.2 microsecond pause. Please acknowlege this message by sending ACK2 (IBM Part number 43A.9) indicating you recieved the initial ACK and agree with its contents. NAK2= Please send NAK3 for confirmation ACK2= Please send ACK3 for confirmation NAK3= Please resend NAK2 just to make sure. ACK3= ABEND 43. DXOEY-NODE N1ETSO/TSO/MVS=FAILED The Ronald Reagan Protocol: NAK= Resend that, I was sleeping. ACK= Was that a packet? I don't remember. EOT= Nancy, what was that? .signature? You gotta be kidding... (If these were funny, I'd do it!)