ted@usceast.UUCP (Ted Nolan) (02/03/85)
During the holidays, I had about seen everything I cared to of the major
releases, so one bored evening I decided to take a chance.
I went to see _Night Patrol_. The add in the paper compared it to
_Police Academy_, which while not a very good movie was at least
watchable and had some funny scenes. Well, _Night Patrol_ isn't
and doesn't. I'm not going to waste your time and mine with a review,
it isn't worth it -- this is a warning only.
I knew I was in trouble when the credits came up in French. Things went
downhill from there. I stayed an hour (I don't know why) and counted
only one mildly funny joke, and I think I was the only one who got it
even though it was telegraphed very unsubtly. The rest was just dumb,
gross and very unfunny. I used to watch 4 or 5 movies a week for 4
years at the college film program and never walked, but I walked on this one.
The only mildly positive thing I can say is that perhaps Pat Paulsen
could be effective if he was given a role in a real movie.
After I walked, I was at loose ends, so I said to myself, "Well you can't
get burned like that twice in one night", so I moved over to _After the
Fall of New York_. I was wrong.
This one is an Italian movie badly dubbed into English. The hero has to
find the last fertile woman on post nuke earth in the ruins of NYC.
To complicate matters, the victors in the war (EURAKS) hold the city in
an iron grip. No explanation is ever given of why the radiation has
made ALL women (except for this one frozen one) sterile.
This is so obviously a rip off of Escape from New York and The Road Warrier
that I kept expecting to see a kid with a boomerang pop up or hear someone
say "Hey (hero's name) I thought you were dead". The special effects were
pitiful and the plot logic minimal.
But...I didn't walk. There is something about a comedy gone bad that is
unendurable, but when an serious film goes bad, now that's kind of fun.
(Remember Plan 9). I can't recommend _After the Fall of New York_, but
the audience did have a good time, though not in the way intended.
Ted Nolan ..usceast!ted
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Ted Nolan ...decvax!mcnc!ncsu!ncrcae!usceast!ted (UUCP)
6536 Brookside Circle ...akgua!usceast!ted
Columbia, SC 29206 allegra!usceast!ted@seismo (ARPA, maybe)
("Deep space is my dwelling place, the stars my destination")
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