pete@stc.UUCP (01/23/86)
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From the August 1853 preface to `Bleak House', written by Charles
Dickens:
"The possibility of what is called Spontaneous Combustion
has been denied since the death of Mr. Krook; and my
good friend MR. LEWIS (quite mistaken, as he soon found,
in supposing the thing to have been abandoned by all
authorities) published some ingenious letters to me at
the time when that event was chronicled, arguing that
Spontaneous Combustion could not possibly be. I have no
need to observe that I do not wilfully or negligently
mislead my readers, and that before I wrote that
description I took pains to investigate the subject.
There are about thirty cases on record, of which the most
famous, that of the Countess Cornelia de Bandi Cesenate,
was minutely investigated and described by Giuseppe
Bianchini, a prebendary of Verona, otherwise
distinguished in letters, who published an account of it
at Verona, in 1731, which he afterwards republished at
Rome. The appearances beyond all rational doubt observed
in that case, are the appearances observed in Mr.
Krook's case. The next most famous instance happened at
Rhiems, six years earlier; and the historian in that case
is LE CAT, one of the most renowned surgeons produced by
France. The subject was a woman, whose husband was
ignorantly convicted of having murdered her; but, on
solemn appeal to a higher court, he was acquitted,
because it was shown upon the evidence that she died the
death to which this name of Spontaneous Combustion is
given. I do not think it necessary to add to these
notable facts, and that general reference to the
authorities which will be found at page 459* (Macdonald
Illustrated Classics, 1955 - PWK), the recorded opinions
and experiences of distinguished medical professors,
French, English, and Scotch, in more modern days;
contenting myself with observing, that I shall not
abandon the facts until there shall have been a
considerable Spontaneous Combustion of the testimony on
which human occurrences are usually received.
* Another case, very clearly described by a dentist,
occurred at the town of Columbus, in the United States of
America, quite recently. The subject was a German, who
kept a liquor-shop, and was an inveterate drunkard."
--
Peter Kendell <pete@stc.UUCP>
...!mcvax!ukc!stc!pete
`When your achievements match your expectations,
it's time to move on.'mcb@k.cs.cmu.edu (Michael Browne) (01/24/86)
In article <10134@tardis.UUCP> lucius@tardis.UUCP (lucius) writes: >> From: rjh@calmasd.UUCP (Bob Hofkin) >> In article <10133@tardis.UUCP> lucius@tardis.UUCP (lucius) writes: >> > Spontaneous combustion of humans is impossible. >> >> Nevertheless, it happens. (And people explode every day, too.) > Do you have any documented evidence of this happening? By impossible, >I do not mean merely that I am saying that it is impossible, but also that it >does not happen. If you have any evidence to the contrary, please show it. What do you mean by evidence? I don't have any photographs or anything, but when I was an undergraduate, I actually saw someone explode. We were having a party, and Chris had had much too much to drink. Someone made the mistake of saying something negative about the New York Yankees, which set Chris off on one of his tantrums. As he yelled and screamed and ranted and raved, he got redder and redder as his temperature rose. Next thing I knew, there was a small blue flash, a puff of smoke, and no more Chris. He had disappeared completely and we never saw him again. (Well, there was a little dust on the floor, but we weren't sure that it was Chris since we didn't clean very often.) Just goes to show you the lengths to which some people will go to avoid paying for beer. -- UUCP: ..!seismo!k.cs.cmu.edu!mcb ARPA: mcb@k.cs.cmu.edu "It came time to move, so I packed up my Salvador Dali print of two blindfolded dental hygienists trying to make a circle on an Etch-a-Sketch..."
ccs025@ucdavis.UUCP (Johan) (01/25/86)
> >While doing Saturday Night Live, Eddie Murphy once caught fire while > >doing a skit with W. F. Buckley. > > The chemicals used to straighten and maintain Micheal Jackson's hair are > probably flammable. I don't know how it happened to Eddie Murphy. Actually, I heard that Eddie Murphy *is* Micheal Jackson in disguise. He is apparantly a paranoid hebophrenic and uses the Eddie Murphy persona to release his exibitionist side. It certainly would make sense, seeing as he is so shy. What I wonder is who is given credit for the song "Party All the Time", surely Michael wouldn't give Eddie credit and risk losing *another* award! Either way I can't explain why they are so combstible. Although I did here that the person on the net who expressed the "ALIEN" explanation has disapeared !!!! Makes you wonder several things 1)Is Michael Eddie or is Eddie Michael, 2)What planet did these aliens come from, and most importantly-- #3) Why is this in net.movies.....unless of course the aliens own MGM..... . . ^ -___- -- Martin Van Ryswyk {dual,lll-crg,ucbvax}!ucdavis!deneb!ccs025
ccs020@ucdavis.UUCP (Kevin Chu) (01/27/86)
In article <895@dataioDataio.UUCP> bright@dataio.UUCP (Walter Bright writes: > > I understand that when Michael Jackson was filming the Pepsi commercial, > he spontaneously combusted on the stage. I believe it was even captured > on film. > > While doing Saturday Night Live, Eddie Murphy once caught fire while > doing a skit with W. F. Buckley. Catching on fire and spontanous combustion are not the same thing. The Pepsi commercial had a lot of fireworks in it and some of them ignited the 'afro-sheen' in his hair. I heard of anything ever happening to Eddie Murphy. -- Kevin Chu [UUCP] !{ucbvax,lll-crg}!ucdavis!vega!ccs020 [ARPA] ucdavis!vega!ccs020@ucbvax.berkeley.edu
bruce@fluke.UUCP (Bruce Reynolds) (01/27/86)
Come, on, people; this really *is* a movie allusion!
"It happens sometimes. Natural causes. People just explode..."
Loosely paraphrased from "Repo Man", of course.
--
--bruce
--
________________________________________________________________________
Bruce M. Reynolds {decvax,ihnp4}!uw-beaver!--\
John Fluke Mfg. Co., Inc. {sun,allegra}!---> fluke!bruce
(206) 356-5421 {ucbvax,hplabs}!lbl-csam!--/nunes@utai.UUCP (Joe Nunes) (01/28/86)
> In article <895@dataioDataio.UUCP> bright@dataio.UUCP (Walter Bright writes: > > > > I understand that when Michael Jackson was filming the Pepsi commercial, > > he spontaneously combusted on the stage. I believe it was even captured > > on film. > > > > While doing Saturday Night Live, Eddie Murphy once caught fire while > > doing a skit with W. F. Buckley. > > Catching on fire and spontanous combustion are not the same thing. The > Pepsi commercial had a lot of fireworks in it and some of them ignited the > 'afro-sheen' in his hair. I heard of anything ever happening to Eddie Murphy. > -- > Kevin Chu > [UUCP] !{ucbvax,lll-crg}!ucdavis!vega!ccs020 > [ARPA] ucdavis!vega!ccs020@ucbvax.berkeley.edu No, no, no. This is getting silly. Eddie Murphy did a skit on Saturday Night Live in which he played a talk-show guest that had a theory that blacks could spontaneously combust. He gave Michael Jackson and Richard Pryor as examples. As the skit ended smoke started coming out his clothes.
davidl@teklds.UUCP (David Levine) (01/28/86)
>> >While doing Saturday Night Live, Eddie Murphy once caught fire while >> >doing a skit with W. F. Buckley. >> >> The chemicals used to straighten and maintain Micheal Jackson's hair are >> probably flammable. I don't know how it happened to Eddie Murphy. > >2)What planet did these aliens come from, and most importantly-- > #3) Why is this in net.movies..... The answer to these two questions is the same. Michael Jackson and Eddie Murphy are both Black Lectroids from Planet 10, as seen in the film "The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai: Across the Eighth Dimension". Like the Invaders of old, captured Lectroids have a tendency to self-immolate to prevent their disguises from being penetrated after death. Apparently, the conditioning required to rid these talented aliens of their Rastafarian accents left them suceptible to accidental combustion. - David D. Levine, Blue Blaze Irregular (no kidding!) (...{decvax,ihnp4,hplabs}!tektronix!teklds!davidl) [UUCP] (davidl%teklds%tektronix@csnet-relay.arpa) [ARPA]