@RUTGERS.ARPA,@MIT-MC:MDC.JANICE@MIT-OZ (01/24/85)
From: Janice <MDC.JANICE%MIT-OZ@MIT-MC.ARPA> The most recently-made bad one I saw was SATURN III, with Farrah Fawcett and Kirk Douglas, which could have used the slogan, "In space, no one can hear you yawn." However, my two favorite nominees: 1) ROBOT MONSTER, also known as MONSTER FROM MARS and various other titles. This incredibly cheaply-made film featured an invading alien named Ro-Man who was played by an actor in a gorilla suit wearing a diving helmet. Footage was used over and over to represent different scenes, thus leading to some interesting continuity problems. Ro-Man had some sort of alien device in the cave where he was living which produced soap bubbles. *SPOILER, though there isn't much to spoil* The film-makers actually had the gall to end the film with "And then the boy wakes up." Stephen King has warned that it can be dangerous to watch this film stoned (an experiment I have not made). He said if the film had been longer than 75 minutes, he would have died from laughing too hard. This film really is worth seeing as a camp classic. 2) JUST IMAGINE. Just imagine a science fiction musical. With terrible music. Atrocious acting. A ridiculous romance. An utterly stupid, supposedly comic person revived from the past. Impossible plot features. Unfunny humor. (Example: Babies come from machines. The person from the past, seeing this, says something like "Give me the good old days.") And then, to top it all off, a visit to Mars, where everyone is twins (one good, one bad) and wears silly tribal outfits and ... I can't go on. I could recommend this as camp, but only to those with extremely strong stomachs. The singing alone is enough to cause you to lose your last several meals. -------
chuqui@nsc.UUCP (Chuqui) (01/26/85)
>2) JUST IMAGINE. Just imagine a science fiction musical. With >terrible music. Atrocious acting. A ridiculous romance. Hmm... sounds vaguely like Rocky Horror Picture Show (Hey, Rocky! Watch my pull an alien out of my hat!) chuq -- From the ministry of silly talks: Chuq Von Rospach {allegra,cbosgd,hplabs,ihnp4,seismo}!nsc!chuqui nsc!chuqui@decwrl.ARPA God is a trademark of AT&T Bell Labs --- National Semiconductor does not require useless disclaimers on posted material that is obviously not posted by company spokesmen...
wfi@unc.UUCP (William F. Ingogly) (02/05/85)
One of my all-time favorite truly bad SF films is called "Mesa Of Lost
Women." It's about a mad Dr. Arania who transplants the brains of
spiders into people. There's a plane crash on a mesa, Jackie Coogan as
a madman passenger, all the spider women are large and the spider men
are small...
FEMALE LEAD: "Gasp!!?!"
MALE LEAD: "What's the matter?"
FEMALE LEAD: "I don't know... I could have sworn the woods
are full of giant women and tiny little men..."
I don't think I've gotten the dialogue right, but I'm sure you catch
my drift.
Oh, yes, there's a voice-over explaining the "plot," and the musical
background consists of a very bad solo Flamenco guitarist. Many
close-up shots of leering tiny spider men and ultra-seductive spider
women. Check it out if it comes on Creature Feature.