@RUTGERS.ARPA:DENNETT@SRI-NIC.ARPA (02/19/85)
From: Steve Dennett <DENNETT@SRI-NIC.ARPA>
All this talk about bad SF films has reminded me of three films I saw
(and thankfully, quickly forgot.) Two of them I can't remember the
titles for, but if anyone else saw them, perhaps they'll remember.
1. "The Final Programme", based on one of Michael Moorcock's Jerry
Cornelius books. Civilization is breaking down; the only way
to save it is for Jerry to evolve into homo sapien's successor.
He does by entering a machine which fuses him with a woman into
a hermaphroditic creature that resembles a cave-person in drag.
2. "Triad(???)", was a big budget film, starring (I believe) Paul
Neuman. Set in a future ice age, people were having trouble
breeding and were plagued by random violence. Neuman was some
sort of hunter/trapper. Also, there were lots of Rottweiler dogs
running around in the snow. Weird and very boring.
3. Title Unremembered - This one came out about the same time as
"Battle Beyond the Stars." It was sort of an ALIEN ripoff; a
space ship lands on a planet to retrive a crystal (or something).
The crew must make there way into a huge pyramid/mountain. In
the caverns they meet their worst fears come alive (i.e., the woman
who has claustrophobia is crushed in a palpitating cavern). Worst
scene: another of the women is killed by her worst fear; she is
raped by a giant snail (I kid you not) that slimes off her clothes
(for a flash of bare flesh to wake the audience), and dies moaning.
Blech!
Steve Dennett
(hooked on awful sf films)
-------leeper@ahuta.UUCP (m.leeper) (02/21/85)
REFERENCES: <687@topaz.ARPA> >From: Steve Dennett <DENNETT@SRI-NIC.ARPA> > > >All this talk about bad SF films has reminded me of three films I saw >(and thankfully, quickly forgot.) Two of them I can't remember the >titles for, but if anyone else saw them, perhaps they'll remember. > >1. "The Final Programme", based on one of Michael Moorcock's Jerry > Cornelius books. This was known in the US as LAST DAYS OF MAN ON EARTH and as THE FINAL PROGRAMME in the UK. > >2. "Triad(???)", was a big budget film, starring (I believe) Paul > Neuman. This was Robert Altman's QUINTET, starring Paul Newman. > >3. Title Unremembered - This one came out about the same time as > "Battle Beyond the Stars." It was sort of an ALIEN ripoff; a > space ship lands on a planet to retrive a crystal (or something). > The crew must make there way into a huge pyramid/mountain. In > the caverns they meet their worst fears come alive (i.e., the woman > who has claustrophobia is crushed in a palpitating cavern). Worst > scene: another of the women is killed by her worst fear; she is > raped by a giant snail (I kid you not) that slimes off her clothes > (for a flash of bare flesh to wake the audience), and dies moaning. Best known as GALAXY OF TERROR but also released under the titles MINDWARP: AN INFINITY OF TERROR and PLANET OF HORRORS. It was made by New World Pictures in 1981, the same folks who made BATTLE BEYOND THE STARS the previous year. Mark Leeper ...ihnp4!ahuta!leeper
aar@homxa.UUCP (A.RAPPE) (02/21/85)
It wasn't a large snail...it was a maggot....and you forgot about Erin Moran
(happy days) being squeezed until she burst by wires or cords.
Let me know if I left anything out......
Tom