dbw@sdcsvax.UUCP (David B. Wollner) (08/28/86)
The mouse story brings to mind an anecdote from my days at a nameless corporation. We were situated out on the edge of nowhere with construction all around us. Naturally the small rodents were anxious to get away from the bulldozers and started scurrying around the plant. This led to much hilarity on our part, but unfortunately some of our fellow workers were not amused. There were a number of hardware, and software hackers at the plant, and so the best trap we could come up with was a big brown cardboard box which we would chase the little suckers into, and then deposit them outside. This worked well for a few of them, but then came the smart mouse. The smart mouse knew better than to run into those big empty brown spaces. If he kept behind the desks and file cabinets, he could keep about four highly paid computer professionals busy for an hour. We chased him back and forth behind two desks for a long time, until he parked himself behind the filing cabinet. In order to chase him out from behind there, I tilted the filing cabinet forward, and another person stuck the mouse scarer behind the filing cabinet. A third person reported that he had run behind the desk. I lowered the filing cabinet, and we all looked for his next hiding spot. We couldn't find him! Naturally we assumed that he was back behind the filing cabinet, so I tilted it forward and someone looked back there. Flat mouse! Oops! This incident prompted a small cartoon of me chasing a few mice down the corridor attempting to stomp them with a filing cabinet. - dbw
manderso@sdcsvax.UUCP (Mark Anderson) (08/28/86)
Back in the good old days when I was an undergraduate, I heard how they "trapped" rats in one of the housing annexs. Some of the students lived in an old house on campus which of course had rats in the attic. As is the case with alot of rats standard poisons just didn't work. Someone made up a batch of contact explosives and then covered them with peanut butter. The goodies were placed in the attic for the rats to feed on. Every now and then late at night there would be a small explosion in the attic. You can guess the rest. As far as I know rats can not built up an immunity to this method of extermination. mark anderson sdcsvax!manderso
ilacqua@bucsb.bu.edu.UUCP (';-) (08/29/86)
In article <2037@sdcsvax.UUCP> manderso@sdcsvax.UUCP (Mark Anderson) writes: >..................Someone >and then covered them with peanut butter. The goodies were placed in >the attic for the rats to feed on. Every now and then late at night >there would be a small explosion in the attic. You can guess the rest. >As far as I know rats can not built up an immunity to this method of >extermination. Yes but, rats have been known to build 'land mine detectors'... -- +--------------------------------------------------------------------+ | See these eyes so green? I can stare for a thousand years... | |UUCP: ...!harvard!bu-cs!bucsb!ilacqua | |ARPANET: ilacqua@bucsb.bu.edu | |CSNET: ilacqua%bucsb@bu-cs BITNET: engemnc@bostonu | +--------------------------------------------------------------------+
wa60@sdcc12.UUCP (paul van de graaf) (08/30/86)
[ I've told this story before on the old net.bizarre, but since the ] [ subject came up, I thought I'd give the new users a chance to hear it. ] A while back, mice invaded my humble abode. They do it every year in late Fall. To escape the cold, I suppose. One night after coming home from an late-night hacking session, I heard scratching noises coming from the cup- boards. It was being to annoy me, so I opened the cupboard door to investigate. Inside I found a dirty brown mouse hiding behind some boxes. Having gotten this far, I wasn't sure what to do next. The mouse had frozen at the sight of me, and we stared at each other wondering what to do. Eventually I decided to chase the mouse out of cupboard for now, and set traps later. I started removing boxes one by one, but the mouse would just move behind another one. Then I tried pushing the mouse out of the cupboard with a box. Success! The mouse lunged out of the cupboard, jumped into the sink, and down into the garbage disposal. By then, the thrill of the chase, and an animalistic surge adrenalin got the better of me. I quickly flipped the disposal switch, and the little mousie was hamburger! Made interesting crunching sounds, but the disposal works to this day. Since then, I stick mainly to mouse-traps. Still, they're not always effective. Twice I've had mice just get their tails caught. It's rather disconcerting to check a trap and find it gone! Then you've got to track the mouse down -- they don't get too far dragging a trap around! And still you're stuck with the dilemma of how to kill it. I drowned one in water, and killed the other with a brick. It's cyanide or chlorine gas for the next mouse. Well they're back again. They're way too early this year. Perhaps it's all the building that's going on around here. I've set the traps and I'm ready for the little buggers. I wish I had a cat. I'm suprised nobody's mentioned slugs yet... My! there's a salty topic. Paul van de Graaf sdcsvax!sdcc12!wa60 U. C. San Diego
slouie@ernie.Berkeley.EDU (Screwy Louie) (08/30/86)
In article <673@sdcc12.UUCP> wa60@sdcc12.UUCP (Paul van de Graaf) writes: > Since then, I stick mainly to mouse-traps. >... >I drowned one in water, and killed >the other with a brick. It's cyanide or chlorine gas for the next mouse. > >Paul van de Graaf sdcsvax!sdcc12!wa60 U. C. San Diego Nuclear!!! Go nuclear!!! Take the little bastards out while ya got the chance! Actually, the mice are merely trained terrorists from North Finland who are out to destory the world as we know it! Before, there were always rumors of mice terrorism in many nations thoughout the world. Random events of mice "accidentally" chewing through wires of many military institutions, resource labs, homes of innocent women and children, and even (gasp!) those of USENET facilities. Have you heard of such ravaging and destruction in North Finland? Nooooooo! Even the Soviets admit they have mice in their country. Today's common house mouse has been trained in many more forms of death and torture than his counterpart a few years ago. But, we have been warned by others of the actions of the mice. Many brave people have tried to warn us, but were quietted quickly by effiecent mice. Remember "Tom and Jerry"? Jerry won out most of the time, didn't he? Ever stop to figure why a supposively weak mouse ever stood up against a large hungry cat? How about old "Mickey"? Pro-mouse propaganda has been seeping in our culture for DECADES! And "Mighty Mouse"? Warnings of superpowered mice by a brave cartoonist! And now, it's gone... Hmmmm... Douglas Adams' "supermice", Benjy Mouse and Franky Mouse, who are really beings from another dimension. Hey, I'm worried. But what can poor humans do against the scrounge of professionally trained mice? Well, we could fight them with conventional weapons, but that would take decades and cost us billions in dollars and lives. So, we must turn to using our minds to outthink these "rodents of death". Building a better mousetrap is a good idea, but we must wipe mice from the face of this Earth! Personally, I'm arming myself with a double-12 gauge pump shotgun. I've set out little piles of peanut butter out on the floor. When they come for me, I'm gonna give 'em a fight like they have never seen bef ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- -The Mad Hobbit- ARPA: slouie@{ernie,cory}.Berkeley.EDU UUCP: ucbvax!{ernie,cory}!slouie USnail: 2398 Parker #7, Berkeley, Ca 94704 Disclaimer: You really gonna believe this? I've got some swamp land... "Hairy toes! I just *LOVE* hairy toes!"
gaynor@topaz.RUTGERS.EDU (Silver) (09/01/86)
[] This discussion puts me in mind of my own pestilence problems in an former residence. Lo, we (my family and I) had lived in this old house for 12 years with nary a scuttle, and behold, one fateful day, the mouse was espied running from behind the organ to behind the TV. There is something about mice and rats that seems to pull a veil over people's sanity. Some react with an unborne terror; our family seemed to become enraged. My mother and I hunted the little furry bastard down, and, striking almost simultaneously with a textbook (me) and a broomstick (mom), we slew it. We slew it and we laughed! As I tend to stay up late, in the silence I could track the dirty devils somewhat easier. On one particularly good night, armed with a broom (a very good weapon for mice: for an area attack, an quick open-faced swat stuns, whereas a good hard one will kill; for the directional attack, the broom handle makes an excellent club; for strategy, the wide bristly end can also be used to shore up holes in the battlefield) and a (gulp) carving knife (this fell weapon was on-hand (we had had steak for dinner) when the madness struck), I bested FOUR (ie 4, IV, point hand up and pull thumb down across palm) of those grim little warriors before the late late movie had come and gone. Yes, one died under my trusty blade, as he ran between my legs when I cornered him. When the rose-tinted fringe of bloodlust left our vision, we realised that this was a fruitless battle - after all, they can crawl and live behind walls and other inaccessible locations. So we called in reinforcements. The rest of the war can be summed up in a single logical implication: before and exterminators and vermin => after and exterminators . The preceeding is a true story, and was sponsored by DIVS (Death to Invading Vermin Society). Silver ----- Silver (argyros (greek), argentum (latin)) Silver is the whitest and most reflective of the metals, also having the highest thermal and electrical conductivity. It is second only to gold in malleability and ductility. name: Andy Gaynor e-address: ...!topaz!gaynor address: 19 Evergreen Drive, Denville, 7 Raven Drive, Morristown phone: 627-8953, 267-8660 atomic symbol: Ag atomic number: 47 atomic weight: 107.88 isotopes: 107 (0.5135), 109 (0.4865) melting point: 950.5 C boiling point: 1950 C density: 10.49 hardness: 2.5 - 3.0
henry@mit-trillian.MIT.EDU (Henry Mensch) (09/01/86)
Yeah. We have roaches instead of meeses. Now that I've told the entire Western Hemisphere, will you *please* send soemone down here to get rid of them? -- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Henry Mensch | Technical Writer | MIT/Project Athena henry@athena.mit.edu ..!mit-eddie!mit-athena!henry
eisaman@ihlpl.UUCP (Eisaman) (09/02/86)
All of these mouse killing stories reminded me of an Animal Stories letter I heard on WLS in Chicago several years ago. The following is certainly not verbatim but to my nearest recollection. Uncle Larry is reading a letter to Little Snot Nose Tommy. "We have a way to kill mice that we feel is of a humane way. My wife and I don't like the thought of poison or traps so we have invented our own way to catch the dirty mice in our house. We tape a flimsy paper plate to the edge of our kitchen counter. And on the furthest end from the counter we place a Cheetos Cheese puff. Under the plate we have your garbage container with several inches of water in it. We set this up and night and in the morning, if we are lucky, we have a dead mouse floating in the bucket. We can then throw the mouse away feeling like we were humane in our manner." About this time Uncle Lar and Tommy are rolling on the floor gasping, "Humane, HA HA HA HA!" But wait, the mice trick was not the only humane concept this couple came up with. "We would also like to relate another story about a squirrel that we had to dispose of. One day as we looked out our back door we saw a squirrel laying in our back yard. When we noticed it had been laying in the same spot for several hours we decided to investigate. When approaching the squirrel. It moved away from us but not very rapidly because its back was broken. Concerned about the animals welfare we called a vet. The vet told us that there was nothing he could do for it but if you do not want to see it suffer, then you should put it out of its misery. We asked what method he suggested. He told us to hit it real hard with a shovel. We thanked the vet but neither one of us could bring ourselves up to hit the poor creature to death. So we thought of another way. I located a box and my wife got a broom. We then spent about an hour trying to herd the squirrel into the box." Tommy is getting real hysterical. "We then took the box into the garage and attached it to the back of our VW. I started it up and after a short time the squirrel stopped scratching at the side of the box and then died. We were sorry that the animal had to die, but were proud of the way in which we handled the matter." I thought that this was one of the most hilarious Animal Stories that I ever heard. It is a lot funnier when Tommy is laughing hystericly in the background, and Uncle Lar is adding comments about them chasing a lame squirrel around the yard for an hour.
gtaylor@astroatc.UUCP (Tiotto Matte Kudasai) (09/03/86)
One of the students in my Dutch class at Cornell was friends with several members of the local Amish community (he was studying their dialect, I believe). He got this little hint from their uh....do you call it a community newsletter? It seems clear that the Amish didn't do this in house, though. Their humane and cheap approach to rodent control involved buying a box of Potato Buds (this is how the whole thing started, I think. My friend asked why the PBs were the only mix in the house....) and putting them out for the little buggers with a big bowl of water next to it. They chowed on the Buds, drank a little water, and then uh...expired. I guess it may not have been *that* humane, but hey. -- "So the selfsame sounds on my soul make a music too..." (Wallace Stevens "Peter Quince at the Clavier") Gregory Taylor, Astronautics
hann@ihlpg.UUCP (Hann) (09/03/86)
> Building a better mousetrap is a good idea, but we must wipe mice from the > face of this Earth! > Personally, I'm arming myself with a double-12 gauge pump shotgun. > I've set out little piles of peanut butter out on the floor. When they come > for me, I'm gonna give 'em a fight like they have never seen bef > ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- > -The Mad Hobbit- ARPA: slouie@{ernie,cory}.Berkeley.EDU > UUCP: ucbvax!{ernie,cory}!slouie USnail: 2398 Parker #7, Berkeley, Ca 94704 *** REPLACE THIS LINE WITH YOUR MOUSE *** In Joseph Heller's _Catch-22_, Yossarian would sit on his bunk holding the cord to the light and his Army-issue .45 caliber handgun, waiting for the scratching sounds of a marauding enemy mouse. Upon hearing the mouse, he would yank the light on and blaze away at the corners of his tent. I think he finally did get the mouse. Lenn Hann ihnp4!ihlpg!hann Minds are like parachutes; they only work when open.
sues@hercules.UUCP (Sue Anne Smith) (09/04/86)
On the subject of mousetraps... I finally gave up trying to be ms. niceguy and started setting traps for a rather healthy mouse population down in the basement. I found a little hole the mice were crawling out of the wall through and put a mousetrap in front of it. The mice would step out of the hole onto the trigger in the mousetrap and ... well, I need not go on. It was a great set up (sort of like instant- on radar, they didn't notice it until it was too late). Then one day I was down in the basement and noticed the trap had a mouse in it but didn't have time to empty it. I came back a few hours later to find the mouse and trap were missing. I looked all over the basement and even tried to see if the trap could have been pulled through the hole into the wall (no way). To this day, I've yet to find a trace of either the mouse or the trap. What happened to it (them)? Have you seen my mousetrap? (I'll send a desdription along if it will help.) Did the other mice carry off their fallen comrade, hold a funeral service and burn the trap in his/her memory? Are the mice using the mousetrap to help THEM design a better trap? Should I pay more attention to those sqweeky whispers I sometimes hear in the night? (Should I have posted this to net.rumors? net.general?) Sue Anne Smith hercules!sues Tektronix, Inc. Beaverton, Oregon Say what you want, but don't say "walizxinbinhitrujlomngingquksnablityabingbing" all in one breath.
ln63szh@sdcc3.ucsd.EDU (Lisa Kemp) (09/06/86)
ok. so this may not be entirely relevant. but I just HAD to relate
a fond childhood memory. I've been reading quite a bit about
catching and killing mice.........
anybody out there ever have a renegade hamster? you know... your
first pet ("Mommie... MOMMIE... but I *will* take care of it...")
well, my small monster decided he/she (I never cared to look)
enjoyed freedom more than the Habitrail. *gasp* hard to imagine,
eh? perhaps because I threw the furry rat at my brother more than I
fed it... BUT anyway, it got out of its cage regularly and to catch
it (for more abuse, no doubt) we would get out the old plastic pail
that we took to the beach to capture sandcrabs (which of course sunk
to the bottom of the pickle jar once we got them home), propped it
up with a pencil, tied a one end of a piece of thread around the
pencil and the other around a goodie. apple worked best. stupid
hamster fell for it every time. the next morning, we would throw it
back into the Habitrail and scold it for trying to escape. we were
pretty stupid too... as if the scolding would make the hamster think
twice next time... as if the hamster thought once about it.
(be patient, this really is not a long story)
well, the stupid rodent finally died in the cage. it was never the
same after my mom threw it very hard against the wall. you see, it
was dark and it crawled up into her bed... and well, like most
normal human beings, she thought it was a rat. what better thing to
do to a rat than grab it and throw it against the wall??
I think someone way up my family tree must have worshipped airborne
rodents.
Lisa still-disclaimerless Kempslouie@ernie.Berkeley.EDU (Screwy Louie) (09/08/86)
In article <1320@hercules.UUCP> sues@hercules.UUCP (Sue Anne Smith) writes: >On the subject of mousetraps... ><...> >I came back a few hours later to find the mouse and trap >were missing. I looked all over the basement and even tried to see if the >trap could have been pulled through the hole into the wall (no way). To this >day, I've yet to find a trace of either the mouse or the trap. What happened >to it (them)? Have you seen my mousetrap? ><...> > >Sue Anne Smith >hercules!sues >Tektronix, Inc. >Beaverton, Oregon > Obviously you have a group of some of the better organized mouse gangs hiding in your basement. From the description, the mice seem to be almost humanly intelligent in getting away from the scene of the crime. The way I figure it, is that his buddies pulled him back into the hole and separated him from the trap (using tiny, little wire cutters!) After that, who knows? They are probably using the spare pieces of trap to set a giantic HUMANTRAP!. Whack! Off with yer 'ead!! I'd be reeaaalll careful about the dark coners in your basement. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- -The Mad Hobbit- ARPA: slouie@{ernie,cory}.Berkeley.EDU UUCP: ucbvax!{ernie,cory}!slouie USnail: 2398 Parker #7, Berkeley, Ca 94704 Disclaimer: You really gonna believe this? I've got some swamp land... "Hairy toes! I just *LOVE* hairy toes!"
cc1@locus.ucla.edu (Michael Gersten) (09/09/86)
All right, all right. I came home one day, and I find this big metal bar
over my Amiga. Now, all this talk about better mouse traps is one thing,
but when you use it on a computer that uses a mouse, thats too far. Even
if they are friends with each other, leave computers and their mice alone.
Views expressed here may not be those of the Computer Club, UCLA, or
anyone in their left OR right mind. And that's the name o' that tune.