seltzer@learn.DEC (DECWORLD/MGMT MEMO/EMPLOYEE COMMUNICATIONS) (11/20/85)
Reproduced here in full is yesterday's Miles Kington "Moreover" column
from the London Times.
H o w R e a g a n c o u l d b e r o o k e d
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Chess fans will be glued to their teleprinters today for the start of the
long-awaited world championship between Russian maestro Mikhail Gorbachov
and the whirlwind American master Ronald Reagan. Both are recognized as
being the best in the world today, so many people are forecasting a long
series of draws, but the battle for supremacy should provide many moments
of excitement and play of the highest quality.
Their styles provide an absorbing study of contrasts. Gorbachov is a
typical product of the Soviet chess machine, methodical, thoughtful and
bent on gradual domination of the board by any means. Previous encounters
between East and West have been overshadowed by the tendency of the Russian
champion to die just when things were getting exciting, but the Russians
have cleverly chosen a young man this time, and whatever Gorbachov lacks,
it will not be stamina.
Reagan, by contrast, is a much more mercurial player, some would say
distrait. He tends on occasion to forget that he is playing a game of chess,
or to get the name of his opponent mixed up with somebody completely
different, but his huge following insists that he represents all that is
best about America and no other American has close come to challenging him.
Here, for instance, is a recent game in which Reagan skilfully exploits his
opponent's conventional approach to strategy.
White Reagan; Black Mondale
Nicaraguan Defence
1 P-K4 P-QB4 2 P-K4 P-Q3
3 P-K4 N-KB3 4 P-K4 resigns
Maddened by Reagan's brilliant option of doing the same move over and over
again, the usually unflappable Mondale blows up and resigns. This tactic
of saying or doing the same thing over and over again is one invented by
Reagan. Some experts call it innovatory, others say it's because he doesn't
know any other move, but this is disproved by another recent Reagan game.
White El Salvador; Black Reagan
White House Offensive
1 P-K4 P-K5! 2 resigns
Here, Reagan uses another tactic of his own invention, that of moving the
other man's pieces. There is no answer to this, especially whwn Reagan owns
the chess board, the chess pieces and the chess officials. Another pretty
example of Reagan's fresh approach to the game comes from a very recent
short encounter with Prince Charles.
White Prince Charles; Black Reagan
Nancy Variation
1 P-K4 Q-SW1! 2 draw agreed
Reagan prefers short, sharp games, as if he cannot conceive of any chess
encounter going on much beyond five moves, but Gorbachov is an
intriguingly different customer. Here is an excerpt from a game played
last month, starting at the 25th move.
White Gorbachov; Black Rest of the World
KGB Gambit
25 Q-B6 PxQ! 26 Q=Q!!
What this unusual sign means is that Gorbachov suddenly revealed that his
opponent's Queen had been working for the Russians all along! In an
amazing press conference in Moscow, the so-called Black Queen testified
that she had been drugged and forced to play for Black against her will,
and that from now on she would be playing for White. This turned the whole
game in Gorbachov's favour.
Here is another eaxample of the wily Russian's play, from a recent game in
the Kabul championships.
White Gorbachov; Black Afghanistan
Tank Defence
36 RxB,R,P,P
What seems to have happened here is that Gorbachov actually orders part of
the chess board to be blown up, an unconventional move but one which does
not actually seem to be against the local rules. We have a picture,
in fact, of two players who on their own terms are unbeatable but who
have never met any player of their own class before, nor one so much
outside their own experience. Our experts will be on hand to analyse every
move between the irresistible Gorbachov and the veteran Reagan, who is
said to be perfecting a new Star Pawn defence which Gorbachov can never
pierce. Whatever happens, it is certain that neither side will admit
defeat.
(C) Times Newspapers, 1985.
Wednesday 20-Nov-1985 tedrick@ernie.BERKELEY.EDU (Tom Tedrick) (11/21/85)
Congratulations to Gary Kasparov (formerly Weinstein), the new World Chess Champion! However, in line with official Soviet policy aimed at suppressing Jewish culture, Kasparov should be warned that the KGB has been busy working out opening surprises for Karpov to use against him in the return match. We have come across the following secret analysis which is designed for Karpov to use when he has the white pieces. Opening: KGB Gambit 1). P-K4, P-K4 2). B-B4, N-QB3 3). Q-R5, Q-K2 4). QxQ check! QxQ 5). Q=Q check!!! K-Q1 6). QxB mate. It turns out that the Black Queen has been turned into a double agent, and will defect to Karpov at move five! Watch out, Gary! (With apologies to Miles Kington :-)
ccs020@ucdavis.UUCP (Kevin Chu) (11/22/85)
> [...] > > Opening: KGB Gambit > > [...] > > 4). QxQ check! QxQ I'm no chess master, but doesn't that mean: "queen takes queen" replied by "queen takes queen"? How many queens does each player get anyway?
tedrick@ernie.BERKELEY.EDU (Tom Tedrick) (11/23/85)
In article <371@ucdavis.UUCP> ccs020@ucdavis.UUCP (Kevin Chu) writes: >> [...] >> >> Opening: KGB Gambit >> >> [...] >> >> 4). QxQ check! QxQ > >I'm no chess master, but doesn't that mean: >"queen takes queen" replied by "queen takes queen"? >How many queens does each player get anyway? Damn! A typo that ruined the joke. It was supposed to be 4). QxP check! QxQ
ashby@uiucdcsp.CS.UIUC.EDU (11/24/85)
The whole article is meant to be taken humorously; each game segment given is illegal.
amholden@watnot.UUCP (amholden) (11/26/85)
> In article <371@ucdavis.UUCP> ccs020@ucdavis.UUCP (Kevin Chu) writes: > >> [...] > >> > >> Opening: KGB Gambit > >> > >> [...] > >> > >> 4). QxQ check! QxQ > > > >I'm no chess master, but doesn't that mean: > >"queen takes queen" replied by "queen takes queen"? > >How many queens does each player get anyway? > > Damn! A typo that ruined the joke. It was supposed to be > > 4). QxP check! QxQ I think that Tom Teddrick should mind his P's and Q's. amh. die young and be poor!