done@teklabs.UUCP (07/01/83)
Someone once asked what the "H." stands for in the popular (and perhaps
blasphemous) expletive "Jesus H. Christ". Well, I have discovered the
answer: the "H." stands for "Howard", which is God's real name. This
is easily observed in the Lord's Prayer:
Our Father, who art in Heaven, Howard be thy name....
If there's anything else theological I can help you with, let me know.
Don Ellis
Tektronixdhb@rayssd.UUCP (07/05/83)
I agree. The proper answer is Harold! This is re-enforced by that ever popular Christmas hymn "Hark the Harold Angels". -- Dave Brierley ...!decvax!brunix!rayssd!dhb ...!allegra!rayssd!dhb Raytheon Co.; Portsmouth RI; (401)-847-8000 x4073
nrh@inmet.UUCP (07/08/83)
#R:teklabs:-213800:inmet:6400016:000:164 inmet!nrh Jul 6 19:10:00 1983 All right you guys. Never mind about "Howard be thy name". You're barking up the wrong tree, but even if you aren't, isn't this a little risky? Nat Howard
floyd@burdvax.UUCP (07/08/83)
>From the study of certain translations of religious documents we find that
the phoenyn,
_
ve
was, incient times, pronounced,
^
ol
which could mean that the H actually stands for "Harvy"tim@unc.UUCP (07/08/83)
From our friend Bob Langdon at Inter-Temple Ministries: "God's
name is HOLY not howard."
Thank you, Bob. I had been under the impression that the original
posting was a joke, but you have shown me the light. I see now that
the poster was a poor deluded fool in the grip of Godless secular-
humanist-inspired ignorance of the true nature of God. With a truly
penetrating light you strip away the foolishnesses of these poor
souls, showing us the One, the Way, the Truth. Thank you for your
concern.
______________________________________
The overworked keyboard of Tim Maroney
duke!unc!tim (USENET)
tim.unc@udel-relay (ARPA)
The University of North Carolina at Chapel Hillbenson@dcdwest.UUCP (Peter Benson) (07/11/83)
No, the proper answers is "Hallmark" --- When you care enough to send the very best Peter Benson !decvax!ittvax!dcdwest!benson
3391dms@hogpc.UUCP (07/11/83)
Regarding children's misquotes...
My friend tells the story of when her daughter was quite young,
and the family had just finished setting up their nativity scene...
She seemed really confused, looking at each of the figures,
behind the manger, on the floor, etc. Finally, she asked:
"Where's Bert? Bert's missing!" {Bert???}
Eventually, the family figured out where the mysterious "Bert"
had come from: the child's Sunday-School teacher had told her
that "Mary gave Bert the baby Jesus..."
Ah yes, from the mouths of babes!death@yale-com.UUCP (Doctor Death) (07/11/83)
i always thought the 'H.' was short for 'H.M.S.', or 'His Majesty's Saviour.' yours in pseudo-brittanica -=- death -=-
bloom@inmet.UUCP (07/12/83)
#R:teklabs:-213800:inmet:6400022:000:107
inmet!bloom Jul 11 21:38:00 1983
So what's the shortest verse in the Bible?
Ray "who the H. cares?" Bloom
{harpo, ima}!inmet!bloomfiled01@abnjh.UUCP (07/13/83)
Actually, God's first name is Ed, as you can tell from the prayer: :...our Lord, hallo! Ed by thy name.."
jeb@eisx.UUCP (07/13/83)
Let's not forget the first grader who seemed to have included an extra figure in his crayon drawing of the nativity. When the teacher asked him to identify the rotund, bearded figure in the corner, he answered, "Well, of course, that's Round John Virgin."
bob@itm.UUCP (07/14/83)
To: Tim Maroney,
YOUR WELCOME!!
I want you to know that I do not appreciate those kind of jokes.
If it is a joke post it to net.jokes where it belongs.
Bob Langdon
itm!-Atlanta Ga.
msdc!itm!bob
itm = In Touch Ministriesnather@utastro.UUCP (07/14/83)
I always wondered about Round John Virgin...
silver@emory.UUCP (07/14/83)
Lead us not into Penn Station...
eric@whuxlb.UUCP (07/16/83)
#R:teklabs:-213800:whuxlb:7400014:000:206 whuxlb!eric Jul 15 17:31:00 1983 The shortest verse in the bible is in John, i believe... "Jesus Wept". -- No i don't read the Bible, but trivia books are great........ Eric Holtman WH 1c-352d, x4890 harpo!whuxlb!eric
franka@tekcad.UUCP (07/16/83)
#R:teklabs:-213800:tekcad:7600015:000:738
tekcad!franka Jul 15 08:35:00 1983
To: Tim Maroney,
YOUR WELCOME!!
I want you to know that I do not appreciate those kind of jokes.
If it is a joke post it to net.jokes where it belongs.
Bob Langdon
itm!-Atlanta Ga.
msdc!itm!bob
itm = In Touch Ministries
/* ---------- */
Well, what do you know? Born-agains are no better at spelling
than anyone else. I guess holy inspiration still doesn't tell people
the difference between "your" and "you're". It must be overrated. For
a real man's religion (never mind, you pinks out there) write to:
The Sub-Genius Foundation
P.O. Box 140306
Dallas, TX 75214
Bob knows! Release your Yacatizmic powers today.
Frank Adrianbloom@inmet.UUCP (07/16/83)
#R:teklabs:-213800:inmet:6400030:000:852
inmet!bloom Jul 15 10:37:00 1983
And here's a vote for the shortest verse from Larry Bickford at
qubix.
Ray Bloom
{harpo, ima}!inmet!bloom
--------------------------------------------------------------
>From notes Fri Jul 15 04:15:23 1983
>From cca!decvax!decwrl!qu!lab Thu Jul 14 00:14:00 1983 remote from ima
From: decvax!qubix!lab <lab@ima!cca!decvax!decwrl!qu.UUCP>
Subject: Shortest Verse
To: decwrl!decvax!cca!ima!inmet!bloom
Message-Id: <8307142156.AA20279@decvax.uucp>
Received: by decvax.uucp (3.326/3.14) id AA20279; 14 Jul 83 17:56:50 EDT (Thu)
Mail-From: UUCP host QUBIX rcvd at 14 Jul 1983 14:55:26-PDT (Thursday)
References: <174@inmet.UUCP>
In English, John 11:35 "Jesus Wept"
In Other Languages, perhaps in I Chronicles 1 "Eber, Peleg, Reu"
(which is about 6 or 7 Hebrew letters)
Larry Bickford, ihnp4!decwrl!qubix!lab
'EOF'
echo "And Away It Goes..."