scott@yale-com.UUCP (Walter Scott) (02/26/84)
Bat Mitzvah's at 13 in the US? That's not necessarily true; I personally
have never been to or heard of a synagogue which gave Bat Mitzvah's at any
age but 12, though I can imagine a Reform congregation changing something
like that for the sake of "equality."
The reasoning I always heard for giving Bat Mitzvahs at 12 instead of 13 was
that the Bar / Bat Mitzvah represents a coming of age and a passing into
adulthood, and since girls mature earlier than boys, they should have
the ceremony earlier. Nothing "sexist" about it, just a recognition of
real biological differences between girls and boys.
--
Reaching out through the void of netland...
Walter Scott
Yale University
decvax!yale-com!scottmeg@sii.UUCP (Marta Greenberg) (02/27/84)
b At my synagogue (Conservative) girls had a Bat Mitzvah after 5 years of Hebrew lessons. Hebrew generally started in the 3rd grade, so the Bat Mitzvah came in the 8th grade. For most girls this was the grade they turned 13, and the Bat Mitzvah was held near their birthdays. For my younger sister, though, 8th grade was the year she turned 14, and her Bat Mitzvah was still held near her birthday. (Her birthday is in December and she was held back a year when starting kindergarten because the deadline for turning 5 was October.) Waiting an extra year agewise didn't bother her -- all her classmates had Bat Mitzvah's the same school year. What annoyed her is that her twin brother had his Bar Mitzvah the year before, when they turned 13. If I remember all of it, my mom had wanted to have a big joint celebration for them, but it never worked out. Marta Greenberg, Software Innovations, decvax!ittvax!sii!meg
trb@masscomp.UUCP (02/27/84)
I'd like to inform all of you who might not know, and remind all of you who do, that the concept of bar mitzvah and bat mitzvah are simply the Jewish passages into adulthood for boys and girls respectively. The Jewish equivalent of turning 18 in the US. Literally, "bar" means "son," "bat" means "daughter" and "mitzvah" means "commandment." "Bar mitzvah" means "son of the commandments," i.e. one who is obligated by the commandments. Becoming a bar mitzvah means that a man has the obligations of manhood, he's required to fast on appropriate occasions, he may be called up for an Aliyah (to read from the Torah), he must wear Tefillin when he prays, etc. NOTE WELL! Being a bar mitzvah has NOTHING to do with whether your parents gave you a party. I don't know how many times I've heard ignorant Jews say "I was never bar mitzvahed" as though the party had some significance. The ceremony is only an acknowledgement of what happens whether you celebrate it or not. So you are not bar mitzvahed, you become a bar mitzvah. I guess the same people who are bar mitzvahed, eventually graduate. The transitive verbalization (gak!) "I was bar mitzvahed" is most common and accepted, as is the notion that the cermony is the "bar mitzvah," though "I became a "bar mitzvah" is proper." Remember, you are the bar mitzvah (until you die), the party isn't really the bar mitzvah. Andy Tannenbaum Masscomp Inc Westford MA (617) 692-6200 x274
jt@druca.UUCP (TurnerJI) (02/28/84)
Bat Mitzvahs in the temple I was raised in occurred at age 13. The temple reformed and in LA, Calif. Jeff Turner
jt@druca.UUCP (TurnerJI) (02/28/84)
Oops -> that was the temple was reformed (not the temple reformed). Sorry. Jeff Turner
dave@utcsrgv.UUCP (Dave Sherman) (02/28/84)
I don't think Andy is quite right in his statements about Bar Mitzvah.
There is in fact a religious ceremony - being called to the Torah for
the first time - and at that point the boy's father says "Baruch
she-p'tarani..." (roughly, "Blessed is G-d for having relieved me
of the obligations for my son"). Of course the party has no religious
significance, but being called to the Torah does.
Dave Sherman
--
{allegra,cornell,decvax,ihnp4,linus,utzoo}!utcsrgv!davesb@linus.UUCP (Shimshon Berkovits) (02/29/84)
Andy is actually correct. Bar mitzvah is something a boy becomes on his thirteenth Hebrew birthday; bat mitzvah is something a girl becomes on her twelfth Hebrew birthday. Nobody has to do anything. (I am told that in the case of my father, a reasonably well known Orthodox philosopher and theologian, nobody did anything for several weeks. When it was his "turn" to be called to the Torah for a weekday reading, he was quietly called. That was a matter of several weeks later.) However, once a boy reaches religious majority, he is elligeable to be called to the Torah. It has become the practice to call him on the first oportunity that arrises. If he comes to services only on Shabbat (Saturday), that's when he gets called. It has further become the practice to make note of this recognition of his becoming bar mitzvah by having a party. Unfortunately, the party often becomes the main focus of the boy's passage into religious adulthood. He becomes a bar mitzvah even if his parents have not told him he is Jewish. Shim