dberry@ucla-cs.UUCP (11/23/84)
In digging through old talmudic commentary found in archeological excavations in Salem and Rehoboth, Massachusetts, Rabbi David Ben Yaakov Halevi has determined that the American Thanksgiving has Hebraic origins and has in fact determined without a shadow of a doubt why one eats turkey, of all foods, on Thanksgiving. First it was discovered that, as most Jewish Holidays, the festive meal and what is eaten is supposed to remind one of the purpose of the holiday. For example, on Pesach, one eats matzah to remind him or her of the fact that the ancient Hebrews had to leave Egypt and slavery so quickly that there was insufficient time to let bread rise. The ancient documents found explain that since the purpose of Thanksgiving is to give thanks, l'hodot (lamed he vav dalet vav tav) one should therefore eat hodu (he vav dalet vav). Now, it was observed correctly that eating hodim would not be kosher; hodim, like other human beings, neither have a split hoof nor chew the cud. Thus it was necessary to find another candidate for consumption. Well, in and around Salem and Rehoboth one found many tarngolei hodu (turkey in English). Therefore it was decided by the sages to decree that on yom todot one would eat targolei hodu. In fact, this discovery seems to explain the strange mysterious greeting that one occasionally hears on thanksgiving, "Give thanks that you are not the turkey". In Hebrew this is rendered as "Hodu she-atem lo tarngol ha-hodu". David Ben Yaakov Halevi