[net.religion.jewish] Article on "Carried Away Christians"

faigin@ucla-cs.UUCP (12/22/84)

This is an article from the "Lahaina News" 12/12/84 issue, which
I thought would be of interest to the various religion groups on
the network. The fellow who wrote it is a regular writer for this
paper, and although he can be off the wall at times, occasionally
he writes excellent articles. In my opinion, this is one of them.
I am posting it without further comment.

	SECOND OPINION by Bob Kelsey, Lahaina News Columnist.

			"Carried Away Christians"

	I saw a T-shirt on a tourist that read, "Love the Lord."
	His wife wore one that said, "Long Live Christianity."
	Some people post their religion for all the world to see.

	We all have known people like those mentioned above. They
	mean well, but frankly, they are big bores. There are
	things in the world to talk about other than religion.

	Many years ago, in Honolulu, I was living on the fifth
	floor of an apartment building in Waikiki. We were a big
	happy friendly group; we all had pool parties and beach
	outings. Then one day the lady who lived across from me
	asked if I had met the new people who moved in next to me
	a few days ago. I told here I had not, but I heard they
	were very nice people. "They are weird," she said. Weird I
	can get used to, I told her. The next day, I met them in
	the hallway, a man and his wife and a daughter about my
	own age (I was 22 at the time.) I shook hands with them
	and they asked me if I was a Christian. I was somewhat
	taken aback at this; it came without any warning. I
	muttered that I was, and he asked me what church I was
	going to. I told him and he looked at his wife and shook
	his head. "We'll show you the way," he said. I excused
	myself and showed myself the way to my door.

	An hour later, the wife knocked on my door and invited me
	to dinner. I figured I could go through anything for a
	free meal, and after all, that daughter was very pretty.
	As soon as I walked into their apartment, they all took
	my hand and prayed. I felt a little red in the face, but
	it was a very nice gesture and it did make me feel
	welcome. Their apartment was something to behold. The
	walls were covered with religious pictures. I counted at
	least four portraits of Christ and three or four versions
	of the Last Supper. A shelf was full of books dealing
	with religion and record albums... all religion music.
	The daughter asked me if I would like to hear some music,
	and did I have a favorite singer? I told her I was very
	impressed with the songs of Mahalia Jackson. The father
	came over to me and put his hand on my shoulder and said,
	"We don't play nigger music in our home." I about fell
	over. I felt like running for the door but my feet
	wouldn't move. "How about Tennessee Ernie Ford?" I wonder
	what his reaction would have been had I asked for Elvis.

	We had a lovely dinner after about a 10-minute prayer. I
	almost fell asleep, my eyes were closed so long. After
	dinner, ice water was served. They didn't drink tea or
	coffee. Then we had an after dinner prayer, thanking God
	for the meal. The husband and wife excused themselves and
	went into the kitchen. I was left with the daughter. 

	We went over to the couch and she sat very close to me.
	"I'm a virgin," she proudly announced. I could have bet a
	million bucks on that. It was hard to tell whether she
	was bragging or complaining about her status. "I have
	never been kissed," she said. I told here that I didn't
	think any of this information, as enlightening as it was,
	was any of my business. Her revelations sounded like a
	plea for help and I didn't want to get romantically
	involved with such a strange family. She didn't hear a
	word I was saying. "I'm going to run away. I hate my
	parents and the life they are forcing me to lead." I told
	her she was over 21 and she could do as she wanted. "They
	said they would kill me if I left home." That was my cue
	to leave.

	I thanked them for the wonderful meal; told them I had to
	be at work at six in the morning (true) and I go to bed
	very early. In the middle of the night, my doorbell rang.
	It was you know who. "You have to help me run away!" she
	whispered. I shut the door in her face and went back to
	bed. I half expected to hear yells of "rape!" in the
	hallway. The next day I called the landlord and told him
	the whole story. In this way I was protecting myself in
	case the girl did cause me any touble. If I touched her
	hand that could me that we were engaged. Never know about
	these things and I was tking no changes. A few weeks
	later they moved. I never saw them again.

	Some Christians wear their faith for all the world to
	see. (Not just Christians, some other people get carried
	away about their faith). They wear it on their wall, on
	their T-shirts, on the bumpers of their cars, everywhere.
	They have it emblazoned on their towels, tottooed on
	their chests and burned on their foreheads. I have always
	been a religious person. I have had several profound
	religious experiences. I has always felt that it's better
	to live a good Christian life rather than brag about it.
	I don't have a "Honk If You Love Jesus" bumper sticker, I
	don't have any religious paintings in my home. You'd have
	to look hard to find my faith in my home. I do have a small
	plaque with a Biblical quote on it, and there is a small
	cross next to my bed. That's it. I operated my business
	on Christian principles but didn't brag about it to
	everyone who would listen. In interviews, I didn't
	mention my faith, that's a private matter. Religion is
	supposed to bring comfort and inspiration to our lives. I
	still think of that poor girl in Honolulu. I wonder what
	ever became of here. I hope she found what her parents
	were incapable of giving her: happiness.

-- 

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