twersky@aecom.UUCP (Yitz Twersky) (01/16/85)
It was the first day of Passover, a lovely spring morning in Chicago. In his
car, a sports-minded young rabbi sped along the Outer Drive, anxious to arrive
at the synagogue in plenty of time for the Passover services. But as he drove
by the South Side Country Club he was seized with an overwhelming urge to play
a few rounds of golf. "What will it hurt?" he thought. "I have an hour or so
before I'll be needed at the temple." Of course, it was an act of sacrilege,
but no one in his congregation was anywhere near the golf course and it was
highly unlikely he would be found out. Somewhat guiltily he went into the
locker room, selected some clubs and then strolled out to the green where he
teed up a ball and began to enjoy himself.
But his every action had been observed. High above, the patriarch Abraham had
seen the rabbi swerve from the straight and narrow,and he phoned God who lived
in a nearby exclusive section of heaven. "I don't want to seem like a busybody
Boss, but as God is my witness I just saw a rabbi playing golf-and here it is
Passover, too."
"Don't call me `Boss,'" said God testily, "and stop taking my name in vain. I
know all about that rabbi. You think I need secondhand information? You leave
that rabbi to me. I'll punish him good."
Meanwhile the rabbi was enjoying himself immensely. He took careful aim, hit
the ball squarely and it rolled into the cup on the other end of the fairway-
a beautiful hole in one!!!!!.
The patriarch Abraham roared in righteous anger. Grabbing the phone he voiced
his indignation to God. "What kind of punishment do you call this?" he cried.
"Here a rabbi plays golf on Passover when he should be in synagogue with his
congregation, and what do you do? You actually reward him with a hole in one."
When God answered, his voice was infinitely patient:
"So, tell me, Abe, who can he tell?"
I have yet to think of a signiture.
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