rej@cornell.UUCP (04/26/84)
A year or so ago there was talk in New York state about starting
school at age 4 (in an effort to save money, I think). Therefore,
I found interesting a study of students who were taught at home.
Children who received the first few years of schooling at home were
more independent, less affected by peer pressure (this could be
read as "less well socialized", I guess) but did not have markedly
higher academic skills. The conclusion was that it was not
necessarily a good idea to start school early.
My mother taught me until fourth grade. When I went to school, I
didn't know how to raise my hand to go the bathroom (well, I knew
HOW, I just thought it was pretty silly), I didn't know how to
fight in the playground, but I was at the top of all my grades
academically. I am now much better socialized, and about to graduate
with a PhD, so any tradeoff was probably worthwhile.
My wife has two older siblings, each with three children. Her sister
is a full time mother, but the children have not, shall we say, lived
up to expectations. Her brother works full time, and his wife is a
lawyer who has just opened her own office. The kids have been raised
by Montessori, various housekeepers, and as much time as the parents
can afford. (And I mean, as much time as possible, no excuses.) These
kids are, at this early point in their lives, outstanding. Nevertheless,
my wife plans to be a fulltime mother, and I plan to work to support the
family. In addition to our idiological biases in favor of this plan of
action, my wife's mother worked as a secretary (due to financial needs).
My wife wishes things had been different, and wants 'a better life' for
our children.
The point of all this is that it is impossible to make (correct) sweeping
statements of the form "children will grow up better with a full time
parent". Children grow up better with happy parents, and with food on
the table. Sometimes these needs conflict. Many people seem to do a
very good job at raising children in spite of the fact that they have
fulltime jobs outside the home. Some people would be lousy fulltime
parents, but are able to be good parents for part of the day.
I would like to close with a question. If a fulltime parent is good,
wouldn't two be better? How about three or four? The only children
that I played with in childhood were my brother and sister (this is an
exaggeration, of course) and I spent a lot of time with adults. I
watched adults work and talked a lot with adults. Although I never
was in the 'in' group in high school, now that I am an adult I do not
seem to have any social problems. Maybe the notion of segregating
children in little groups is a bad one.
Ralph Johnson {ihnp4,decvax,vax135,...}!cornell!rejfleischer@gigi.DEC (Bob Fleischer 231-2132 MRO3-2/E7 ECS) (04/27/84)
My wife taught second grade for 7 years. I don't remember her noting any differences between "day care" and "parental care" kids, but she never had any trouble telling which kids came from broken homes. They formed the majority of "problem kids". Fri 27-Apr-1984 10:42 Bob GIGI::Fleischer 231-2132 MRO3-2/E7