ellen@ucla-cs.UUCP (11/12/84)
i now have a very bright 4 year old. i cannot say how much was due to
inherent qualities and how much to stimulation in infancy, but i sure
believe in the value of early stimulation. so, here are some books
i would recommend to new or soon-to-be parents, on several topics:
1) "The First Twelve Months of Life" by Frank Caplan and the Princeton Center
for Infancy & Early Childhood, pub. Bantam Books (paper).
This is subtitled "Your baby's growth month by month. While it presents
guidelines in infant development, suggestions for suitable toys and games
and activities, descriptions of typical behavior and development, the
authors never forget that each child is an individual and that babies
do not follow a strict time table. very useful to see where one is going,
what is `normal', what to expect, and to help keep new parents from having
unrealistic expectations of their new child(ren). definitely useful to
first-time parents, and, from what i have heard, even to not-brand-new
parents.
2) "Your Baby and Child" by Penelope Leach, pub. Alfred A. Knopf (paper).
The author is British, so there are a few phrases that may differ, but
this certainly does not detract from the value of this book. a parent
i know who just had a third child bought this book, feeling that this was
a very useful book. gives guidelines for development, how to deal with
various problems, answers many parents' questions; wonderful photographs
of children of all ages and races at play, experiencing the various emotions
of childhood, interacting with other children and adults; helpful charts
and pictures of how to diaper, bathe, clothe a new infant; first aid
procedures and what to do til the doctor comes; comparative tables of
different ways to cope with problem behavior and suggestions for coping
with it or modifying it, etc. i like this better than Spock or (what's
his name ?Fitzhugh Dodson? or something like that).
3) "Total Baby Development" by Dr. Jaroslav Koch, pub. A Wallaby Book by
Pocket Books.
Don't be put off by the name ("Total" "Complete" yuck!) this is a FANTASTIC
book to have for interacting with your baby. it basically only goes up to
the first year, but within that time your baby will do more growing and
changing physically, mentally, and emotionally than at any other time in
her/his life. you'll be amazed at what that tiny "weak" infant is capable
of. the subtitle is "over 300 exercises and games to stimulate your baby's
intellectual, physical, and emotional development" and i don't doubt it
for a minute. when you don't know what to do with that little thing that
may not seem to aware of the world around her/him, open this up at the
right age level and start interacting. you'll find that little blob of
soft flesh and wet diaper is much deeper and more fun. suggestions for
toys and games you can make yourself (i like that, it's certainly isn't
necessary to buy a lot of useless pastel junk and soft undemanding stuffed
creatures for a baby).
4) "Growing Up Free" by Letty Cottin Pogrebin, (i bought the hard cover when
it first came out, but it is available in paper now).
This is a very valuable book if you want to do your best to help your child
grow up to be a WHOLE person able to reach her/his full potential; not a
fluffy girly thing who can't figure out what's wrong with the car or
balance her checkbook because she's afraid of numbers; not a tough macho guy
who doesn't care how other people feel as long as he can get his rocks off.
The author is a feminist - she is happily married and has three children.
She is not interested in females who hate men or men who wimper. She is
interested in people who are in touch with all their faculties, physical,
mental, emotional, and spiritual; and her book examines in detail, with
footnotes and scientific information, what happens to people who are cut off
from important parts of themselves, the way a standard male-female cultural
dichotomy teachs; she want people to be able to consciously make their life
goal choices - if a woman wants to be a "homebody" she should be doing that
because it is what she WANTS, not because she has been brainwashed to
believe that is all she is capable of doing; if a man wants to nurture, he
should be free to make that choice without fear of being thought "less than
a real man" because it's not the conventional way to be. the author is
constructive, supportive, positive, intelligent, compassionate, and supports
all arguements with a vast amount of research into the literature of
child development, psychology, education, etc. Should be required reading
for all parents.
on the subject of toys, there are two brands of infant toys that come to
mind as being worthwhile (of course there are others, but these are especially
good for new babies).
One is Fisher Price: i have no vested interest in the company, but
over the years, i found their toys to be durable, sustain interest over a long
period of time (kids don't get bored in a week or two because most are so
open ended, lending themselves to a variety of types and levels of play),
are definitely geared to development and fun at the same time, are made for
both boys and girls so the parents don't have to get hung up in sexism (little
girls like trucks (sets with male and female scientist or truck driver dolls)
and boys like something to cuddle (the company makes a friendly boy doll to
dress and hug, tho' it may be hard to find, since the standard toy stores think
along standard lines (pink's for girls and blue's for boys)). they may cost a
little more than some competing companies (esp. some of the clone toys from Hong
Kong and Taiwan) but they are much better designed and made, so they function
better and last longer.
The second changed its name since i bought their toys. it was a
Swedish company called Semper and they make crib and stroller toys that are
fantastic. none of those wimpy pastels that don't get to the kid's optic
nerve, but bright primaries + green on very modern toys. i bought the crib
toys: they screw (with large, boldly colored plastic screws) onto a bar
that attaches to the top rails of the crib - they are interchangable so you
can switch them when the kid gets bored with one or outgrows one.
they are geared to monthly stages of infant development and kept my very
demanding baby entertained and engaged. i'm unfortunately unsure of the
name they are sold under now - i think an American company bought the rights
to distribution in the States - but they are fairly easy to identify, they
look so very European, clean and modern, in little clear plastic cases with
handles and a photo of a European baby (you can tell by the brightly colored
and modern baby clothes) playing with the one in the box. There was a four
bladed spinner of bold yellow with large green balls on the ends (Tamara loved
this one), a peek-a-boo toy: baby pulls on a large ring and a simple, cleanly-
designed face on a head pops up out of a box, a "bee" (looked like a butterfly
to me) that flaps and clacks its wings when baby pulls the ring (Tamara loved
this). i would recommend these over the VERY UGLY American crib toys
(those HIDEOUS peek-a-boo day-glo clowns and wimpy bunnies). These tend to be
sold in "better" toy shops, not usually the discount chains, but look anyway,
you never can be sure.