dwl10@amdahl.UUCP (12/20/84)
The following article was "borrowed" from the Washington Post 12/19/84
THE SANTA SOLUTION
How Parents Can Remain Credible While Dealing With the Myth
By Dr, Joseph R. Novello
One of the most difficult questions a parent may face at this time of year
will come from a child: "Is Santa Claus Real?"
Many parents want their young children to believe in Santa Claus, but
worry about deceiving their kids - they don't want to loose credibility.
It is possible, however, to have the best of both worlds - to perpetuate
a harmless myth while still maintaining trust - even in a sophisticated
world where 3-year-olds wear designer jeans and 5-year-olds enroll in
fast-track, Princton-prep kindergartens.
It helps if Mom and Dad have some understanding and perspective on the
Santa Claus Dilemma.
The first serious study of children's beliefs about Santa was conducted by
psychologist Frances E. Duncombe in 1896. She surveyed 1,500 children,
aged 7 to 13, in Lincoln, Neb., to determine perceptions of Santa Claus,
age of discovering the "truth", how the truth was learned, and whether
the subjects thought other children should be taught to believe in Santa.
In 1977, three researchers returned to Lincoln to update this study by
asking virtually the same questions of 884 elementary and junior high
students. The results, published in Psychology Today (1979), may help
today's parents reach their own Santa Solution:
o SUPER HERO. In the 1896 study, 90 percent of the children saw Santa as
a super hero. They were wowed by his ability to slide down chimneys and
fly through the sky with his famous reindeer. But modern kids are not so
impressed. Why? Today, he has some tough competition. How do you top
He-Man and Wonder Woman? Most kids today consider Santa as a nice old man
with some semi-impressive powers who hangs out in the toy department of
the local shopping mall.
o AGE OF DISCOVERY. You'd think today's sophisticated kids would figure
out the santa scam much earlier than their 19th-century counterparts. Not
so. Duncombe's children learned the truth at an average age of 6.4, while
modern children found out the facts at age 7. It's difficult to say why,
but remember that children really did grow up sooner in the old days.
They had to. Many of them joined the work force after a few perfunctory
years of schooling. They were closer to the adult world. They were
quicker to accept, if not fully understand, adult perceptions.
o WHO TELLS. Most children today learn the truth about Santa Claus
directly from their parents. The researchers suggest that this probably
reflects our present-day preoccupation with being "honest" with our kids.
It wasn't always like this. The 1986 study found that most of the subjects
learned about Santa from other children - only 25 percent actually had
their bubble burst by Mom and Dad.
o SHOULD THE MYTH LIVE? For all of their presumptive savoir-faire, today's
children believe more strongly (70 percent) then their predecessors (57
percent) that the Santa Claus myth should be perpetuated. They want other
kids to experience the happiness that Santa brings - even if he's only an
illusion.
===
These studies tell us that kids need Santa Claus. In fact, I've found kids
will believe in Santa up to a certain age no matter what their parents tell
them. Part of the reason rests in the magical minds of the children themselves.
From approximately age 2 to age 7, childrens' cognitive ability is marked
by what psychologist Jean Piaget called the preoperational stage, when
they do not easily distinguish fantasy from reality. They are not
concerned with apparent contradictions. If a child at this developmental
stage is told the "truth" about Santa Claus, he may shrug and say something
like: "Ok, so he's not real - but he can fly, right?"
At about age 7, however, youngsters enter Piaget's stage of concrete
operations. Now they are capable of knowing and understanding the truth. Of
course there's no Santa Claus. How silly.
So why do so many 7- and 8-year-olds choose to keep the secret to
themselves? It's because they are trapped, for a time, in the no-man's-land
between fact and fiction, belief and wish. And may kids, while KNOWING that
Santa is a fairy tale, go right on WISHING he were real.
Santa Claus, after all, represents a time when things were simpler, Santa
knows everything, and children are good in hope that St. Nick will leave
lots of presents beneath the tree. Powerful stuff. Hard to give up.
Better hedge your bets.
And there's another reason that kids cling to Kris Kringle: They don't
want to spoil it for Mom and Dad.
===
So when a child comes up to you in the next few days and pops the big
question, how do you respond?
I suggest that you not be too quick with either the warm reassurances or
the cold facts. Instead, let the child show the way. What is she asking?
What does he think?
You may learn something. I did. An 8-year-old looked up at me last
Christmas and said: "Doctor, don't be so sad. Santa isn't real - but
he's alive. He's the symbol of giving and sharing."
Happy holidays to all.....
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Dave Lowrey
"GORT...Klatu borada niktow"
...{amd,hplabs,ihnp4,nsc}!amdahl!dwl10
[ The opinions expressed <may> be those of the author and not necessarily
those of his most eminent employer. ]