ktw@whuxi.UUCP (WOLMAN) (01/02/85)
When our second child, Ben, was born in April 1981, Jacob, our elder, was two-and-a-half. Because Ben was more than 3 weeks early, we had done relatively little "psyching" of Jake beyond telling him he was getting a new brother (Ann, 36 at the time, had amnio). The day after the baby was born, I took Jake up to the hospital room so he could check out his brother. He was thrilled. Since his speech was not very good at that point, he kept stroking Ben and saying "A-bee, a-bee!" which was his approximation for "baby." Lest you think this is all sweetness and light, however, the problems began once Ben came home. Jake, to put it mildly, was ripped. In the hospital, Ben was a neat toy; at home, he was an intruder who WASN'T LEAVING. We had to put up with a few months of really intense anger before Jake realized, one evening, that this kid had a use. Ben was sitting in a walker, and Jake walked over to him and made some nonsense noises. Ben started to LAUGH. Jake started to laugh along with him. The next thing I knew the two of them were in the living room, shrieking with laughter. That was the turning point in the "jealousy" business. Now it's settled into presumably normal lifetime competition! Hope this helps. Happy baby! Ken Wolman Bell Communications Research @ Livingston, NJ whuxi!ktw