torcsl@utzoo.UUCP (Jason P. Venner) (01/11/85)
I think that the most important task that a parent faces it to
ensure that the children are not insecure. It is my feeling that
many of the problems with people/children behaving at the lowest
common denominator is just a striving to gain acceptance [because
they are not secure within themselves]. I think that this often leeds
to the impulse to 'better' the others at some act so as to gain more
'respect'.
I think that a cause [perhaps major] is that the method of applying
disciplin is to isolate the children when 'bad', and allow them to be present
when good or to only pay attention to them [via punishment] when bad (ignoring
them when 'good').
What would seem to be a more reasonable approach would be to [for young
infants] keep them with you until they wanted to be put down.
This needs much more thought, and I am hoping that many usful points
will come up if it is discussed.
--
Jason P. Venner @ U of Toronto Zoology
{allegra,ihnp4,linus,decvax,watmath}!utzoo!torcslsegs@mhuxv.UUCP (slusky) (01/12/85)
> What would seem to be a more reasonable approach would be to [for young > infants] keep them with you until they wanted to be put down. > > Jason P. Venner @ U of Toronto Zoology This sounds to me like a non-parent. Correct me if I'm wrong. I can't imagine a person who had children suggesting that infants be held till they wanted to be put down. Susan Slusky --
mark@tove.UUCP (Mark Weiser) (01/13/85)
In article <209@mhuxv.UUCP> segs@mhuxv.UUCP (slusky) writes: >> What would seem to be a more reasonable approach would be to [for young >> infants] keep them with you until they wanted to be put down. >> >> Jason P. Venner @ U of Toronto Zoology > >This sounds to me like a non-parent. Correct me if I'm wrong. >I can't imagine a person who had children suggesting that infants be held >till they wanted to be put down. >Susan Slusky >-- I can't speak for Jason, but I am the parent of 2 children, and I certainly think that infants should be held until they want to be put down. We did this with ours as much as possible. We did better with our second: she was in physical contact with a parent 24 hours a day for the first week or so after birth. I'm not saying we always did (or do) hold them as long as they want, but we try, especially when they were infants. -- Spoken: Mark Weiser ARPA: mark@maryland Phone: +1-301-454-7817 CSNet: mark@umcp-cs UUCP: {seismo,allegra}!umcp-cs!mark USPS: Computer Science Dept., University of Maryland, College Park, MD 20742
tron@fluke.UUCP (Peter Barbee) (01/18/85)
>think that infants should be held until they want to be put down. We did >this with ours as much as possible. We did better with our second: I agree, it has been my experience that you just can't spoil infants. Peter Barbee
mostek@ihnp4.UUCP (James Mostek) (01/18/85)
Holding and hugging is something that should be done more often.
How can someone hold or hug a loved one too much?
--
James Mostek, Bell Labs @ Naperville, ihnp4!mostekpeg@linus.UUCP (Margaret E. Craft) (01/21/85)
i agree with mark - do your best to hold them as much as they think they need it. i, however, find i cannot do that as well with #2 - just not enuf time. first child, now 2, is wonderfully secure and independent and happy.