sed408@ihlpg.UUCP (s. dugan) (09/13/85)
> Mitch Marks @ UChicago writes > ...ihnp4!gargoyle!sphinx!mmar > > I'm echoing Dave Long's question: what IS the point of bedtimes for > children, anyway? I really wonder whether the people who ask this question have had any parenting experiences. > Yes, sure, the kid who stays up late Monday night will be tired Tuesday; > but then will go right to sleep Tuesday early. Not necessarily so. Have you ever heard of being "overtired?" A child that hasn't had enough sleep is a BEAST to be around. It's no fun for the kid either. They hurt and don't feel right but don't know how to tell you what's wrong. It really is a problem! > As for some abstract > kind of `learning good habits', lemme tellya: I had strict bedtimes almost > until I was out of high school, with the result that now I compulsively > stay up, and feel cheated if I fall asleep before 2:00 or 3:00. > -- > At the risk of sounding like an old fuddy-duddy, I would hazard a guess that you are rebelling to some extent. There's a saying, "Bring up a child in the way he should go and when he (she) is old he (she) will not depart from it." I really believe this is true. There are usually some inbetween years of rebellion, but the basic foundation, if set right, always remains. It's like teaching a child about telling the truth and following the "laws of the land." They may go through phases of experimentation, but they usually come back to the behaviour they were taught when they were young. When teaching a child "good habits", as you put it, I think there should be some gentleness and some explaination as to the purpose of the rules. In your case, Mitch, the use of "strict bedtimes" may have been part of the cause of your rebellion. Most children will rebell against arbtrary rules that don't make much sense. I can relate two personal episodes that illustrate this point: Bedtimes: My parents weren't very strict about bedtimes. They would start to remind us about bedtime about an hour before we had to be in bed. That would give us time to finish what we were doing (in our own timeframe) and then amble off to wash, brush teeth, etc. They reminded us about every fifteen minutes until it was really time to be in bed. Most of the time it worked. I don't remember any real hassles on this subject. TV: On the other hand, my parents were very arbitrary about the use of TV. There were no "ifs ands or buts" on this subject. They would not entertain any arguments. As a result, I became a TVaholic. It took me a long time to break the habit. I still fall back on it sometimes when I'm lonely and/or depressed. Perhaps this will spark some new discussions on the subject of rules and why we have them. -- Sarah E. Dugan "Thank God It's Friday." ########################################################################### # AT&T Bell Labs IH 1D-408 The Forest (home) # # Naperville-Wheaton Rd. 1353 Crab Apple Court Apt. 101 # # Naperville, Illinois 60566 Naperville, Illinois 60540 # # (312) 979 - 5545 (312) 355 - 0445 # ###########################################################################