west@sdcsla.UUCP (Larry West) (08/23/84)
I've neglected to obtain permission, but this seems to be urgent enough to bypass that. From the National Enquirer (in August): Your Co-worker Could Be a Space Alien, Say Experts ... Here's How You Can Tell By Michael Cassels Many Americans work side by side with space aliens who look human -- but you can spot these visitors by looking for certain tip-offs, say experts. They listed 10 signs to watch for: 1. Odd or mismatched clothes. ``Often space aliens don't fully understand the different styles, so they wear combinations that are in bad taste, such as checked pants with a striped shirt or a tuxedo jacket with blue jeans or sneakers,'' noted Brad Steiger, a renowned UFO investigator and author. 2. Strange diet or unusual eating habits. Space aliens might eat French fries with a spoon or gobble down large amounts of pills, the experts say. 3. Bizarre sense of humor. Space aliens who don't understand earthly humor may laugh during a company training film or tell jokes that no one understands, said Steiger. 4. Takes frequent sick days. A space alien might need extra time off to ``rejuvenate its energy,'' said Dr. Thomas Easton, a theoretical biologist and futurist. 5. Keeps a written or tape-recorded diary. ``Aliens are constantly gathering information,'' said Steiger. 6. Misuses everyday items. ``A space alien may use correction fluid to paint its nails,'' said Steiger. 7. Constant questioning about customs of co-workers. Space aliens who are trying to learn about earth culture might ask questions that seem stupid, Easton said. ``For example, a co-worker may ask why so many Americans picnic on the Fourth of July,'' noted Steiger. 8. Secretive about personal life-style and home. ``An alien won't discuss details or talk about what it does at night or on weekends,'' said Steiger. 9. Frequently talks to himself. ``A space alien may not be used to speaking the way we do, so an alien may practice speaking,'' Steiger noted. 10. Displays a change of mood or physical reaction when near certain high-tech hardware. ``An alien may experience a mood change when a microwave oven is turned on,'' said Steiger. The experts pointed out that a co-worker would have to display most if not all of these traits before you can positively identify him as a space alien. -------------------- end of article ------------------------ -- Larry West, UC San Diego, Institute for Comparable Species -- decvax!ittvax!dcdwest!sdcsvax!sdcsla!west -- ucbvax!sdcsvax!sdcsla!west -- west@NPRDC