[net.misc] opinion poll for worst song ever!

jla@usl.UUCP (Joseph L Arceneaux) (03/01/85)

Well, I don't think it is "Me and You..";  I *like* that song!   I confess,
however, that I was rather young and impressionable when it came out.
Nostalgia... *sigh*  (:-)


-- 

				    Joseph Arceneaux

                                    USL Computer Science Department
				    {akgua, ut-sally}!usl!jla

	"I'm sorry, but my kharma just ran over your dogma."

inc@fluke.UUCP (Gary Benson) (03/02/85)

> "Me and You and a Dog Named Boo" just came on, and it prompted
> us to start this poll. The question is:
> 	
> 	What is the worst song ever recorded?

Hey, "You and Me and a Dog Named Blue" ain't HALF BAD compared to:


    My Cup Runneth Over with Love

    Dead Skunk in the Middle of the Road


-or anything ever by Pere Ubu for that matter.

-- 
Gary Benson   {allegra microsoft ssc-vax telematic uw-beaver wavetek} fluke!inc
John Fluke Mfg Co  MS 232-E  PO Box C 9090 Everett WA USA 98206  (206) 356-5367
+ This is the day which the Lord hath made; let us rejoice and be glad in it! +

pcf@drux3.UUCP (FryPC) (03/04/85)

Oh no!

It's not that time of year again is it? When someone on the net asks for
the worst song ever recorded? It only seems like two or three months since
the last one. Come to think of it, it WAS only a few months since the last
one. That poll was restricted to net.music and that is why I no longer read
net.music.

I must admit that some very bad records have been made during the last few
months but I cannot believe that the overall worst record will have changed
in that time.  ( Like a Virgin: Maddonna;  Born in the USA: Brucie hmmmmm, I
could be wrong.) 

How about another poll of the worst perennial discussion on the net. Send me
mail and I will summarize to /dev/null.

Peter Fry
drux3!pcf

larryg@teklds.UUCP (Larry Gardner) (03/04/85)

Shouldn't this be in net.music?

Anyway,  I guess I can't say which is the worst, but one of the
worst is Lay Lady Lay.

Also, other songs which degrade relationships.

karen

jcjeff@ihlpg.UUCP (jeffreys) (03/05/85)

>Subject: Re: opinion poll for worst song ever!

I don't know why this is put into net.misc, may be it ought to be put into
net.music. (see net.misc for previous contenders)

If you want bad records, try listening to this one:

Here is the contents of an album called Teenage Tragedy on Rhino Records
dated 1984 (RNC-611)

It I think contains probably some the worst tracks ever cut:

Endless Sleep			 - Jody Reynolds

Teen Angel			 - Mark Dining

Tell Laura I Love Her		 - Ray Peterson

Leader of the Pack		 - The Shangri-Las

Patches				 - Dickie Lee

Last Kiss			 - J. Frank Wilson

I Want My Baby Back		 - Jimmy Cross
 (My Favorite  - not just bad but really sick)

I Can Never Go Home Anymore	 - The Shangri-Las

Homecomming Queen's Got A Gun	 - Julie Brown


Beat that.......

-- 
          [ You called all the way from America - Joan Armatrading ]          
 [ You're never alone with a rubber duck - Hitchhikers Guide To The Galaxy ]
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
||      From the keys of Richard Jeffreys ( British Citizen Overseas )      ||
||              @ AT&T Bell Laboratories, Naperville, Illinois              ||
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
||  General disclamer about anything and everything that I may have typed.  ||
------------------------------------------------------------------------------

jhs@druri.UUCP (ShoreJ) (03/06/85)

My candidate (artist remembered): "You Dirty Old Egg-Suckin' Dog You"
				   --Johnny Cash, Folsom Prison album

My candidate (artist unknown): "Flushed from the Bathroom of Your Heart"
				-- (but it *could* be Cash again!)

--Jeff Shore
  AT&T-ISL 
  ("Where Worlds Collide")

mrl@drutx.UUCP (LongoMR) (03/06/85)

-<>

A bunch of us are playing pool and listening to the radio. A song
called "Me and You and a Dog Named Boo" just came on, and it prompted
us to start this poll. The question is:
	
	What is the worst song ever recorded?

Replies to the net ( I don't have time to read this junk!)

aar@homxa.UUCP (A.RAPPE) (03/06/85)

I NOMINATE......."Short people"........


I guess you know why....

keithd@cadovax.UUCP (Keith Doyle) (03/06/85)

[.........]
>Anyway,  I guess I can't say which is the worst, but one of the
>worst is Lay Lady Lay.
>Also, other songs which degrade relationships.
>karen

In this category, I would add:

1. Beat her with a rake  -  by the Weasels
2. Sit on my face Stevie Nicks  - by icantrememberwho
3. Anything by the Mentors

keith

kenw@lcuxc.UUCP (K Wolman) (03/06/85)

Jeffreys' list is pretty good.  But how in the world could
anyone forget ANYTHING performed by that past Master of the
Musical Emetic, BOBBY GOLDSBORO?
-- 
Ken Wolman
Bell Communications Research @ Livingston, NJ
lcuxc!kenw

	You can't "read" me because I'm not a book.

techpub@mhuxt.UUCP (mcgrew) (03/07/85)

> > "Me and You and a Dog Named Boo" just came on, and it prompted
> > us to start this poll. The question is:
> > 	
> > 	What is the worst song ever recorded?
> 
> Hey, "You and Me and a Dog Named Blue" ain't HALF BAD compared to:
> 
> 
>     My Cup Runneth Over with Love
> 
>     Dead Skunk in the Middle of the Road
> 
> 
> -or anything ever by Pere Ubu for that matter.
> 
> -- 
> Gary Benson   {allegra microsoft ssc-vax telematic uw-beaver wavetek} fluke!inc
> John Fluke Mfg Co  MS 232-E  PO Box C 9090 Everett WA USA 98206  (206) 356-5367
> + This is the day which the Lord hath made; let us rejoice and be glad in it! +

NOW WAIT ONE DOGGONE STINKIN MINUTE GARY!

I happen to like Dead Skunk.  Have you heard the version by
Louden Wainwright III?
It's great!

As far as the worst song goes ANYTHING by Tony Orlando gets my vote...
not to mention KISS.

                              "ok everybody STINK..."

Melanie
ihnp4!mhuxt!techpub

P.S. Gary, anyone who asks that proverbial question...


WHERE DO BABY ASTERISKS COME FROM, DADDY

can't be all bad. I used to ask my dad that all the time (although he Never
did give me a straight answer! :-)

david@daisy.UUCP (David Schachter) (03/07/85)

A song popular in summer of 1974 or so wins my vote.  It was something about
"I had a nickel, shiny and bright."  Saccharine sweet.  Blecch.  Of course,
this is only an OPINION.

[generic disclaimer] {N.F.Q.}

foote@kcl-cs.UUCP (ZNAC???) (03/08/85)

> 	What is the worst song ever recorded?

How about "Lucy in the sky with diamonds", by William Shatner.
I heard this on "Dave's record collection" ( on the David Letterman
show) sometime last year.


                  "...and I'm looking for the joke with a microscope"

                    William Foote
                    Westfield College
                    Univ. of London
                    ARPA:  foote%kcl-cs.uucp@ucl-cs.arpa

keithd@cadovax.UUCP (Keith Doyle) (03/09/85)

If we're allowing the inclusion of T.V. theme songs, my first vote
would be the 'Three's Company' theme.  I'm sure there's worse, but
that one got stuck in my head recently. Yuk!

Keith Doyle

brower@fortune.UUCP (Richard Brower) (03/09/85)

Doesn't anybody remember "Drop-Kick Me Jesus"?
-- 
Richard A. Brower		Fortune Systems
{ihnp4,ucbvax!amd,hpda,sri-unix,harpo}!fortune!brower

randyd@orca.UUCP (Randy Dietrich) (03/11/85)

I have yet to see anything mentioned that is quite as bad as 
"They'er comming to take me away - ha ha".  This gem hit most
requested song one summer in the mid-sixties.  This song was
so bad that the only thing  they could find to go on the flip
side was the same song recorded backward !

Randy Dietrich
Engineering Computing Systems
Tektronix Inc.
Wilsonville, Oregon, USA

ethan@utastro.UUCP (Ethan Vishniac) (03/11/85)

> [.........]
> >Anyway,  I guess I can't say which is the worst, but one of the
> >worst is Lay Lady Lay.
> >Also, other songs which degrade relationships.
> >karen
> 
> In this category, I would add:
> 
> 1. Beat her with a rake  -  by the Weasels
> 2. Sit on my face Stevie Nicks  - by icantrememberwho
> 3. Anything by the Mentors
> 
> keith

How about "Men Have No Pride" by the Anemic Boyfriends?
Possibly deliberate parodies (as opposed to the inadvertant
kind mentioned above) shouldn't be included.

"Don't argue with a fool.      Ethan Vishniac
 Borrow his money."            {charm,ut-sally,ut-ngp,noao}!utastro!ethan

*Anyone who wants to claim these opinions is welcome to them.*

dickson@gondor.UUCP (Scott Dickson) (03/12/85)

What about the perinial favorite 
	"Get Your Tongue Outta My Mouth 'Cause I'm Kissin' You Goodbye"
by Ray Stevens??
-- 

--Scott Dickson
User Consultant
uucp: {allegra, ihnp4, akgua}!gondor!dickson
Bitnet: {allegra, akgua,ihnp4}!psuvax1!BSD@PSUVM.BITNET

cv@linus.UUCP (Chris Valas) (03/12/85)

-=-
Unquestionably the most GODAWFUL piece of CRAP I *ever* heard was
a song by an Australian band called 'Derek and the Wrecks.'  An 
announcer comes on and introduces a gentleman by the name of 
'Chuck Solids.'  Some terrible intro music is followed by this guy 
singing to a girl, telling her how much she moves him and how much 
he needs her, and will she come back to....ULP, URCH,...come back
to his pla...RETCH, HEAVE....  That's right, folks, this guy
(Chuck Solids, natch) starts to vomit uncontrollably with many splashing
sounds (bile on the floor/surroundings, presumably) and *continues*
trying to seduce the girl, punctuating his lines more and more freq-
uently with polysyllabic retchings.  This is *everybody's* nightmare
party guest.  The sounds are so vividly lifelike I almost blew
chunks myself when I first heard it.

This song has taken first place in the Worst Song of the Year Contest, held by 
some radio station in Sydney, Australia, for two years running!  The
telephone vote tally favored it over its nearest competitor by greater
than a two-to-one margin....the switchboard went CRAZY.  

Need I say more?  I thought not...
-=-

Chris J. Valas         {decvax,utzoo,philabs,security,allegra,genrad}!linus!cv
-=-
In the autumn, before the winter, comes mans' last mad surge of youth...

thf@brunix.UUCP (Tom Freeman) (03/13/85)

"In the year 2525"  -  easily the worst top 40 song of all time.

jcjeff@ihlpg.UUCP (jeffreys) (03/13/85)

> I have yet to see anything mentioned that is quite as bad as 
> "They'er comming to take me away - ha ha".  This gem hit most
> requested song one summer in the mid-sixties.  This song was
> so bad that the only thing  they could find to go on the flip
> side was the same song recorded backward !
> 
> Randy Dietrich

The *artist* that did the song was of course Napoleon XIV

The title was almost correct it was:

They're Coming To Take Me Away, Ha-Haa!

The flip side was entitled:

!Aah-Ah, Yawa Em Ekat Ot Gnimoc Er'yeht
-- 
          [ You called all the way from America - Joan Armatrading ]          
 [ You're never alone with a rubber duck - Hitchhikers Guide To The Galaxy ]
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
||      From the keys of Richard Jeffreys ( British Citizen Overseas )      ||
||              employed by North American Philips Corporation              ||
||              @ AT&T Bell Laboratories, Naperville, Illinois              ||
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
||  General disclaimer about anything and everything that I may have typed  ||
------------------------------------------------------------------------------

dbrown@watarts.UUCP (Dave Brown) (03/15/85)

> "They'er comming to take me away - ha ha".  This gem hit most
> requested song one summer in the mid-sixties.  This song was
> so bad that the only thing  they could find to go on the flip
> side was the same song recorded backward !
> 
> Randy Dietrich
> Wilsonville, Oregon, USA

Is the first instance of backward masking????????? HORRORS!!!!!!!!!!

Oh, by the way; for anyone who flames me over the distribution over four nets,
it's a sad day when people flame a bit of  levity.


Sincerely yours,

			DAVE BROWN

edward@ukma.UUCP (Edward C. Bennett) (03/16/85)

How about any song contained on one of those cheapo records
sold on tv?

edward
	 {ucbvax,unmvax,boulder,research}!anlams! -|
		{mcvax!qtlon,vax135,mddc}!qusavx! -|-->	ukma!edward
			 {Lots of Places}!cbosgd! -|

john@moncol.UUCP (John Ruschmeyer) (03/16/85)

I wasn't going to give my least favorite (worst?) song
choice, but since I happened to catch it on the radio
today...

Does anybody remember a song called "Afternoon Delight"
that was out a few summers ago?


-- 
Name:		John Ruschmeyer
US Mail:	Monmouth College, W. Long Branch, NJ 07764
Phone:		(201) 222-6600 x366
UUCP:		...!vax135!petsd!moncol!john	...!princeton!moncol!john
						   ...!pesnta!moncol!john
Silly Quote:
		"Kill Spock? Bones, that isn't what we came to Vulcan for."
						- from "Amok Time"

jcjeff@ihlpg.UUCP (jeffreys) (03/16/85)

> I wasn't going to give my least favorite (worst?) song
> choice, but since I happened to catch it on the radio
> today...
> 
> Does anybody remember a song called "Afternoon Delight"
> that was out a few summers ago?
> 
> Name:		John Ruschmeyer

Wasn't it done by the "Starland Vocal Band" ?

-- 
          [ You called all the way from America - Joan Armatrading ]          
 [ You're never alone with a rubber duck - Hitchhikers Guide To The Galaxy ]
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
||      From the keys of Richard Jeffreys ( British Citizen Overseas )      ||
||              employed by North American Philips Corporation              ||
||              @ AT&T Bell Laboratories, Naperville, Illinois              ||
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
||  General disclaimer about anything and everything that I may have typed  ||
------------------------------------------------------------------------------

shor@sphinx.UChicago.UUCP (Melinda Shore) (03/17/85)

[]
> From: jcjeff@ihlpg.UUCP (jeffreys)
>> Does anybody remember a song called "Afternoon Delight"
>> that was out a few summers ago?
>
> Wasn't it done by the "Starland Vocal Band" ?

Yup, good ol' Bill and Taffy Danoff, from Washington, DC.  I think they've
taken to calling their group Bill and Taffy since then.  They used to play
the Cellar Door quite a bit back in the early seventies.  (Is the Cellar
Door still alive?)

Afternoon Delight came out around 1973, which I guess dates those of us to
whom it seems like a few summers ago.

-- 
Melinda Shore 
University of Chicago Computation Center
uucp:     ..!ihnp4!gargoyle!sphinx!shor
Mailnet:  staff.melinda@uchicago.mailnet
Bitnet:	  shor%sphinx@uchicago.bitnet
ARPA:	  staff.melinda%uchicago.mailnet@mit-multics.arpa

cff@uvaee.UUCP (Chuck Ferrara) (03/17/85)

> "They'er comming to take me away - ha ha".  This gem hit most
> requested song one summer in the mid-sixties.  This song was
> so bad that the only thing  they could find to go on the flip
> side was the same song recorded backward !
> 
> Randy Dietrich
> Wilsonville, Oregon, USA
 

Does anyone happen to know the rest of the lyrics for this "song".
You know, about "the  nice young men in clean white suits", etc.

purtell@reed.UUCP (Elizabeth Purtell) (03/18/85)

In article <5087@fortune.UUCP> brower@fortune.UUCP (Richard brower) writes:
>Doesn't anybody remember "Drop-Kick Me Jesus"?
 Yes! but I only remember it as being a horrible song. Could someone out
there possibly post or mail me the words to it?

thanks

elizabeth purtell
(Lady Godiva)

eshelman@tekigm.UUCP (Douglas Eshelman) (03/18/85)

[bug-juice]

"Drop-kick Me Jesus" is a great song.  It's by Kinky Friedman and the
Texas Jewboys who did many great songs that are (shall we say) somewhat
satirical about country-western music and a little less than serious.
Unfortunately, I've been unable to locate any Kinky Friedman records
(I can't understand why), so can't supply lyrics -- only that its
"drop kick me Jesus, through the goal posts of life."

ben@moncol.UUCP (Bennett Broder) (03/18/85)

I don't remember who does this, but there was a song that got some
airplay on college and cult stations a few years back called
'Warm Leatherette'.  It was a monotanous and repetitive piece of
music, and the lyrics described simultaneously having an orgasm and
a car crash.  The only other song I have ever heard by them had
something to do with television--I dont remember the details, but it
was nearly as stupid as Warm Leatherette.

                                    Ben Broder
                                    ..vax135!petsd!moncol!ben
                                    ..pesnta!moncol!ben
                                    ..princeton!moncol!ben

ethan@utastro.UUCP (Ethan Vishniac) (03/20/85)

> In article <5087@fortune.UUCP> brower@fortune.UUCP (Richard brower) writes:
> >Doesn't anybody remember "Drop-Kick Me Jesus"?
>  Yes! but I only remember it as being a horrible song. Could someone out
> there possibly post or mail me the words to it?
> 
> thanks
> 
> elizabeth purtell
> (Lady Godiva)

First verse (and the only one I remember)

   Drop kick me Jesus through the goalposts of life.
   End over end, neither to left nor to right.
   Straight through the heart of those righteous uprights.
   Drop kick me Jesus through the goal posts of life.

"Don't argue with a fool.      Ethan Vishniac
 Borrow his money."            {charm,ut-sally,ut-ngp,noao}!utastro!ethan

*Anyone who wants to claim these opinions is welcome to them.*

wab@reed.UUCP (William Baker) (03/22/85)

> I don't remember who does this, but there was a song that got some
> airplay on college and cult stations a few years back called
> 'Warm Leatherette'.  It was a monotanous and repetitive piece of
> music, and the lyrics described simultaneously having an orgasm and
> a car crash.  The only other song I have ever heard by them had
> something to do with television--I dont remember the details, but it
> was nearly as stupid as Warm Leatherette.
> 
>                                     Ben Broder
>                                     ..vax135!petsd!moncol!ben
>                                     ..pesnta!moncol!ben
>                                     ..princeton!moncol!ben




	How can anyone forget "Warm Leatherette"?  I first heard it in 
my dorm during my first semester of college.  The crazy dope freak
sophomore (perhaps I shouldn't call him crazy;last I heard he had
$10,000 worth of working capital tied up in his drug dealing) down the 
hall from me used to play it at top volume at 7am on a Saturday morning.
Drove everyone crazy.  The man responsible for the atrocity we know
as "Warm Leatherette"?  Iggy Pop, the same person who wrote the theme
for "Repo Man".  I like the movie theme much better...


					Bill Baker
					tektronix!reed!wab

hutch@shark.UUCP (Stephen Hutchison) (03/22/85)

< Straightjackets for line eaters >

In article <234@uvaee.UUCP> cff@uvaee.UUCP (Chuck Ferrara) writes:
>> "They'er comming to take me away - ha ha".  This gem hit most
>> requested song one summer in the mid-sixties.  This song was
>> so bad that the only thing  they could find to go on the flip
>> side was the same song recorded backward !
>> 
>> Randy Dietrich
>> Wilsonville, Oregon, USA
> 
>
>Does anyone happen to know the rest of the lyrics for this "song".
>You know, about "the  nice young men in clean white suits", etc.

From memory:

"They're coming to take me away"  as performed by Napoleon the 14th:

Remember when you ran away and I got on my knees
and begged you not
to go because I'd go berserk?

WELL,

You left me anyhow, and then the days got worse and
worse and now you see I've gone completely out
of my mind,

AND

(chorus 1)
They're coming to take me away, haha, they're
coming to take me away, ho ho, heehee, ha ha,
to the funny farm where Life is Beautiful all the time
and I'll be happy to see
those Nice Young Men in their Clean
White Coats and they're coming to take me AWAY, HA HAAAAA

You thought it was a joke, and so you LAUGHED,
YOU LAUGHED when I had said that losing you would make
me flip my lid, RIGHT?

You know you laughed.  I HEARD you laugh, you
laughed and laughed and laughed and then you
left, and now you see I'm Utterly Mad

AND

(chorus 2)
They're coming to take me away, haha, they're
coming to take me away, ho ho, heehee, ha ha,
to the Happy Home with Trees and Flowers and
Chirping Birds and
basket weavers who sit and smile and
Twiddle their thumbs and toes and they're
Coming to Take me Away, HAHAAAAAAAAA

Well, you just wait, they'll get you yet, and
when they do, they'll put you in
the ASPCA, you mangy MUTT,

AND

(chorus 1)
(chorus 2)
(chorus 1 trailing into mumbles in the distance)

harmon_c@h-sc1.UUCP (david harmon) (03/22/85)

 Two nominations:
	"Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer" (Christmas song)
	"Everybody Run, the Homecoming Queen Has a Gun"

	Sorry, I don't know who wrote either.

			Dave Harmon

techpub@mhuxt.UUCP (mcgrew) (03/26/85)

> < Straightjackets for line eaters >
> 
> From memory:
> 
> "They're coming to take me away"  as performed by Napoleon the 14th:
> 
> Remember when you ran away and I got on my knees
> and begged you not
> to go because I'd go berserk?
   .
   .
   .

Now that we know the words to side A of the single...

how 'bout telling us about side B... :-)

Melanie

meister@faron.UUCP (Philip W. Servita) (03/27/85)

You left something out....

In article <1293@shark.UUCP> hutch@shark.UUCP (Stephen Hutchison) writes:
>< Straightjackets for line eaters >

>In article <234@uvaee.UUCP> cff@uvaee.UUCP (Chuck Ferrara) writes:
>
>From memory:
>
>"They're coming to take me away"  as performed by Napoleon the 14th:
>
>Remember when you ran away and I got on my knees
>and begged you not
>to go because I'd go berserk?
>
>WELL,
>
>You left me anyhow, and then the days got worse and
>worse and now you see I've gone completely out
>of my mind,
>
>AND
>
>(chorus 1)
>They're coming to take me away, haha, they're
>coming to take me away, ho ho, heehee, ha ha,
>to the funny farm where Life is Beautiful all the time
>and I'll be happy to see
>those Nice Young Men in their Clean
>White Coats and they're coming to take me AWAY, HA HAAAAA
>
>You thought it was a joke, and so you LAUGHED,
>YOU LAUGHED when I had said that losing you would make
>me flip my lid, RIGHT?
>
>You know you laughed.  I HEARD you laugh, you
>laughed and laughed and laughed and then you
>left, and now you see I'm Utterly Mad
>
>AND
>
>(chorus 2)
>They're coming to take me away, haha, they're
>coming to take me away, ho ho, heehee, ha ha,
>to the Happy Home with Trees and Flowers and
>Chirping Birds and
>basket weavers who sit and smile and
>Twiddle their thumbs and toes and they're
>Coming to Take me Away, HAHAAAAAAAAA

I cooked your food
I cleaned your house
And this is how you pay me back
for all my kind unselfish loving deeds
RIGHT?
>Well, you just wait, they'll get you yet, and
>when they do, they'll put you in
>the ASPCA, you mangy MUTT,
>
>AND
>
>(chorus 1)
>(chorus 2)
>(chorus 1 trailing into mumbles in the distance)


-- 
---------------------------------------------------------------------
         is anything really trash before you throw it away?
---------------------------------------------------------------------

coffin@mot.UUCP (Chris Coffin) (03/28/85)

The B side of the're coming to take me away was the same song
... backwards... with the groove starting on the inside of the
record!!!

			Chris Coffin

			(they've already taken me away.)

purtell@reed.UUCP (Lady Godiva) (03/29/85)

There is one song that is so horrible that I almost like it. I don't
remeber the name of it, nor the name of the performer. The first
line was -
"Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz".
Does anyone remember the rest of it?

elizabeth purtell

(Lady Godiva)

jcjeff@ihlpg.UUCP (jeffreys) (03/31/85)

< I like answering muic questions >


 David,
      re your message:

> Two nominations:
>	"Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer" (Christmas song)
>	"Everybody Run, the Homecoming Queen Has a Gun"
>
>	Sorry, I don't know who wrote either.
>

I did try to post this but it got returned.

The proper title of you second choice is "The Home Comming Queen's Got A Gun"

As for the aritst it was Julie Brown (from the "Specially Priced Mini LP 
'Julie Brown - Goddess in Progress'") The writing of the song is credited
to Brown-Coffey-McNally-Colcord.

As you don't like the record, I guess this info is not much use to you, but
at least you now know the proper title :-) :-)

Regards,

-- 
 [ There's a lady who's sure all that glitters is gold,
                        and she's buying a staiway to Heaven - Led Zeppelin ]
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
||      From the keys of Richard Jeffreys ( British Citizen Overseas )      ||
||              employed by North American Philips Corporation              ||
||              @ AT&T Bell Laboratories, Naperville, Illinois              ||
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
||  General disclaimer about anything and everything that I may have typed  ||
------------------------------------------------------------------------------

crm@duke.UUCP (Charlie Martin) (03/31/85)

I normally *detest* this kind of message, honest, ...

but what *is* "they're coming to take me away" doing in net.religion?
-- 
			Opinions stated here.

			Charlie Martin
			(...mcnc!duke!crm)

ndiamond@watdaisy.UUCP (Norman Diamond) (03/31/85)

> There is one song that is so horrible that I almost like it. I don't
> remeber the name of it, nor the name of the performer. The first
> line was -
> "Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz".

I think it was Liza Minelli, or however she spells her name.  If the Lord
really cared for her, he would show it.  (Kind of pointless, though; if the
Lord really cared for anyone, there are lots of more obvious things he would
do to show it.)  No, I don't know the words.

-- 

   Norman Diamond

UUCP:  {decvax|utzoo|ihnp4|allegra}!watmath!watdaisy!ndiamond
CSNET: ndiamond%watdaisy@waterloo.csnet
ARPA:  ndiamond%watdaisy%waterloo.csnet@csnet-relay.arpa

"Opinions are those of the keyboard, and do not reflect on me or higher-ups."

sra@oddjob.UUCP (Scott R. Anderson) (04/01/85)

In article <> purtell@reed.UUCP (Lady Godiva) writes:
>
>There is one song that is so horrible that I almost like it. I don't
>remeber the name of it, nor the name of the performer. The first
>line was -
>"Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz".
>Does anyone remember the rest of it?
>


The song is called "Mercedes Benz", and it was written and performed by
Janis Joplin.  I don't think this song is horrible;  it is indeed of
"great social and political import" (:-)  The lyrics are:

*****
Oh Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz,
My friends all drive Porsches, I must make amends,
Worked hard all my lifetime, no help from my friends,
So, oh Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz.

Oh Lord, won't you buy me a color TV,
Dialing for Dollars is trying to find me,
I'll wait for delivery each day until three,
So, oh Lord, won't you buy me a color TV.

Oh Lord, won't you buy me a night on the town,
I'm counting on you, Lord, please don't let me down,
Prove that you love me, and buy the next round,
So, oh Lord, won't you buy me a night on the town.
*****

That Janis, she was an all time great!

				Scott Anderson
				ihnp4!oddjob!kaos

P.S.  One more vote for net.music.dead!

lee@unmvax.UUCP (04/01/85)

> 
> There is one song that is so horrible that I almost like it. I don't
> remeber the name of it, nor the name of the performer. The first
> line was -
> "Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz".
> Does anyone remember the rest of it?
> 
> elizabeth purtell
> 
> (Lady Godiva)

Boy, you people... Everybody flames the 60's I guess... Oh well, this is
one song at that has at least one fan.

The song was written by:
	J. Joplin & M. McClure
It is called:
	Mercedez Benz

It goes (from a live version):

(I'd like to do a song of great social and political import. It goes like
this...)

Oh lord won't you buy me
a Mercedes Benz
My friends all drive Porches
I must make amends
worked hard all my life time
no help from my friends
So oh lord won't you buy me
a Mercedez Benz

Oh lord won't you buy me a color TV
Dialing for dollars
is trying to find me
I'll wait for delivery
each day until three

So oh lord won't you buy me
a night on the town
I'm counting on you lord
please don't let me down
Prove that you love me
and buy the next round
Oh lord won't you buy me
a night on the town

(.......That's it!)


 You didn't like "The Rose" either, did you?

			--Lee (Ward)

			{ucbvax,pur-ee,gatech}!unmvax!lee

alle@ihuxb.UUCP (Marguerite Czajka) (04/01/85)

> 
> There is one song that is so horrible that I almost like it. I don't
> remeber the name of it, nor the name of the performer. The first
> line was -
> "Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz".
> Does anyone remember the rest of it?
> 
> elizabeth purtell
> 
> (Lady Godiva)

The song is by Janis Joplin.  I'm not sure of the title - it may just
be Mercedes Benz.

stein@druny.UUCP (SteinDW) (04/01/85)

I believe the title of the song is "Mercedes-Benz" by Janis Joplin off
the "Pearl" album.

Here is a half-hearted stab at the lyrics:

Oh Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes-Benz?
My friends all drive Porsches,
I must make amends.
Worked hard all my lifetime,
No help from my friends,
So, Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes-Benz?

Oh Lord, won't you buy me a color T.V.?
Dialing for dollars is trying to find me.
I wait every day for delivery until three,
Oh Lord won't you buy me a color T.V.?

Oh Lord, Won't you buy me a night on the town?
I'm counting on you Lord,
Please don't let me down.
Prove that you love me and
buy the next round.
Oh Lord, won't you buy me a night on the town?

Oh Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes-Benz?
My friends all drive Porsches,
I must make amends.
Worked hard all my lifetime,
No help from my friends,
So, Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes-Benz?

I am sure that the above lyrics are copyright protected and either
ASCAP or BMI but I didn't happen to bring my album collection to
work this morining.

Don Stein
druny!stein

"Sure don't know what I'm going for, but I'm going to go for it, for sure!"

nunes@utai.UUCP (Joe Nunes) (04/01/85)

> 
> There is one song that is so horrible that I almost like it. I don't
> remeber the name of it, nor the name of the performer. The first
> line was -
> "Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz".
> Does anyone remember the rest of it?
> 
> elizabeth purtell
> 
> (Lady Godiva)

The song you refer to was sung by Janis Joplin and is called (I think)
"Mercedes Benz". I don't remember all the lyrics but here goes:	

O Lord won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz
my friends all drive Porsches, I must make ammends
worked hard all my life, no help from my friends
O Lord won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz

O Lord won't you buy me a colour T.V.
"Dialing for Dollars" is trying to reach me
      . . .
      . . .

O Lord won't you buy me a night on the town
      . . .
      . . .
      . . .

P.S: I don't think it's that horrible a song

barb@pyuxa.UUCP (04/01/85)

Do I remember it --- it used to be my theme song!

Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz
My friends all drive Porches, I must make amends.
Worked hard all my lifetime, no help from my friends.
So Lord won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz

Lord won't you buy me a color TV
Dialing for Dollars is trying to find me
I wait for delivery each day until three
So Lord won't you buy me a color TV

Lord won't you buy me a night on the town
I'm counting on your Lord
please don't let me down
Prove that you love me and by the next ring(?)
Lord won't you buy me a night on the town.

The following was recorded by the late, great Janis Joplin
featured on her album "Pearl."

srm@nsc.UUCP (Richard Mateosian) (04/01/85)

In article <1200@reed.UUCP> purtell@reed.UUCP (Lady Godiva) writes:

>"Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz".
>Does anyone remember the rest of it?

Janis Joplin sang this on "Pearl".  As best I remember, it went

	Oh Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz
	My friends all drive Porsches, I must make amends
	.....
	Oh Lord won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz

	Oh Lord, won't you buy me a color TV
	Dialing for Dollars is trying to reach me
	I'll wait for delivery each day until three
	Oh Lord, won't you buy me a color TV

	Oh lord won't you buy me a night on the town
	I'm counting on you Lord, oh please don't let me down
	.....
	Oh lord won't you buy me a night on the town

	He he he.  That's it.

I'm sure I'll remember the rest as soon as I post this.
-- 
Richard Mateosian
{allegra,cbosgd,decwrl,hplabs,ihnp4,seismo}!nsc!srm    nsc!srm@decwrl.ARPA

ron@brl-tgr.ARPA (Ron Natalie <ron>) (04/02/85)

> Two nominations:
>	"Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer" (Christmas song)
>	"Everybody Run, the Homecoming Queen Has a Gun"

Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer is now the biggest selling christmas
song of all time.  It recently edged out White Christmas.

-Ron

karsh@geowhiz.UUCP (Bruce Karsh) (04/03/85)

> There is one song that is so horrible that I almost like it. I don't
> remeber the name of it, nor the name of the performer. The first
> line was -
> "Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz".
> Does anyone remember the rest of it?

  Is this posting a joke?

  Doesn't everybody know that Janis Joplin did this one?
-- 
Bruce Karsh                           |
U. Wisc. Dept. Geology and Geophysics |
1215 W Dayton, Madison, WI 53706      | This space for rent.
(608) 262-1697                        |
{ihnp4,seismo}!uwvax!geowhiz!karsh    |

bcr@ccivax.UUCP (Barry Ruff) (04/03/85)

> I believe the title of the song is "Mercedes-Benz" by Janis Joplin off
> the "Pearl" album.

	Gee, would anyone like to see the lyrics a sixth time??? :-)

gda@unc.UUCP (Greg Abram) (04/03/85)

Someone asked for the rest of this...  I really disagree with its 
listing among the all-time worst.  I'm kind of fond of it.  After
all, its a song of great social and political import.  Goes like this.

....

Oh, Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz,
My friends all drive Porsches, I must make amends;
Worked hard all my lifetime, no help from my friends,
Oh, Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz

Oh, Lord, won't you buy me a color TV
Dialing for Dollars is trying to find me.
I'll wait for delivery each day until 3
Oh, Lord, won't you buy me a color TV

Oh, Lord, won't you buy me a night on the town
I'm counting on you, Lord, please don't let me down.
Prove that you love me and buy the next round.
Oh, Lord, won't you buy me a night on the town

(Repeat first)

js2j@mhuxt.UUCP (sonntag) (04/03/85)

> 
> There is one song that is so horrible that I almost like it. I don't
> remeber the name of it, nor the name of the performer. The first
> line was -
> "Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz".
> Does anyone remember the rest of it?
> 
> elizabeth purtell
> (Lady Godiva)

    I think that was done by Janice Joplin.  Some more lyrics:

  "O Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz?
   My friends all drive Porches.  I must make amends.
   Worked hard all my lifetime, no help from my friends.
   So Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz?

   O Lord, won't you buy me a color TV?
   ....."

   That's all I remember.  The singer, (I think it's Janice) does it in
a really strange kind of gravelley, scratchy voice. 
   I've just remembered another similar old song.  Maybe someone can identify
the performer:

    "I don't care if it rains or freezes,
     as long as I've got my plastic Jesus,
     riding on the dashboard of my car.

     I can go ninety miles an hour,
     as long as I got that magic power..."  and once again, I forget the
rest.
-- 
Jeff Sonntag
ihnp4!mhuxt!js2j
    "No, not bird, nor plane, nor even frog.  
     Just little old me, <crash> UNDERDOG!"- not Idi Ahmin        

hutch@shark.UUCP (Stephen Hutchison) (04/04/85)

[Incredulous with shlock]

In article <1200@reed.UUCP> purtell@reed.UUCP (Lady Godiva) writes:
>
>There is one song that is so horrible that I almost like it. I don't
>remeber the name of it, nor the name of the performer. The first
>line was -
>"Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz".
>Does anyone remember the rest of it?
>
>elizabeth purtell
>
>(Lady Godiva)

Well, since nobody else seems to have replied, I guess I have to tell you.
The song was performed by Janis Joplin, her of the raunchy voice.  I don't
know if it is her handiwork entire, but it DOES seem to need the whiney
overtone she gave it to be really effective.

It's a rather scathing indictment of the "gimme generation", the number
of materialistic fools who were common at the time (and sadly, more common
now, especially at Reed (no offense, I am not pointing fingers at anyone
in particular)).

The first line is
"Oh Lord, won'cha buy me, A Mercedez Benz, Mah friends
all have Porsches, Ah Must make A-Mends!"

And it continues...  But I don't remember all the words

hutch

ndiamond@watdaisy.UUCP (Norman Diamond) (04/04/85)

> > "Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz".
> 
>   Doesn't everybody know that Janis Joplin did this one?

We all do NOW.  We all did, after the first dozen or so messages on it.
Yes, I made a mistake (because I remembered the kind of voice that was
used in singing the song).  Two mail messages and 20 postings have
corrected and corrected and ... and corrected me.  Unusually enough,
none of them has been a mis-correction!  Old net topics never die, and
they never fade away.

-- 

   Norman Diamond

UUCP:  {decvax|utzoo|ihnp4|allegra}!watmath!watdaisy!ndiamond
CSNET: ndiamond%watdaisy@waterloo.csnet
ARPA:  ndiamond%watdaisy%waterloo.csnet@csnet-relay.arpa

"Opinions are those of the keyboard, and do not reflect on me or higher-ups."

man@bocar.UUCP (M Nevar) (04/06/85)

Worst song ever ?

How about Revolution #9 ?
Played forwards, of course.  Backwards it's Top 40 all the way.

Another choice:

You know my name (look up the number)

Once considered to be an A-side (:-)

			Mark Nevar

rm@ptsfb.UUCP (Roger Magoulas) (04/08/85)

In article <729@mhuxt.UUCP> js2j@mhuxt.UUCP (sonntag) writes:
>   I've just remembered another similar old song.  Maybe someone can identify
>the performer:
>
>    "I don't care if it rains or freezes,
>     as long as I've got my plastic Jesus,
>     riding on the dashboard of my car.
>
>     I can go ninety miles an hour,
>     as long as I got that magic power..."  and once again, I forget the
>rest.


That song was played by Don Imus on WNBC in New York when he did
his Rev. Billy Sol Hargess (sp) routine.

					F. Scott Whalebone

tim@hpfclp.UUCP (tim) (04/15/85)

I don't know about 'worst' but one that ranks (:-)) right up there with
'Grandma got run over by a reindeer' is

	Please, Daddy don't get drunk this Christmas.

Sung by John Denver (I think on the Rocky Mountain Christmas album).


Tim Mikkelsen
hplabs!hpfcla!tim