rjd@linus.UUCP (Robert DeBenedictis) (08/28/84)
Geez. This Ken Arndt guy annoys me. Would you say that he's goading? I don't mind him though. (Never you mind.) But all that stuff about the lower intestinal tract, and bowels, and . . . Uh, all that stuff. Excuse me, but, what has that really got to do with being gay? Being gay doesn't mean you have a desire to engage in certain acts. Being gay means you like cuddling with other guys. That you really enjoy their company. Aren't there straights that engage in the acts Arndt described? I could swear I've read about stuff like that in Penthouse's FORUM. (I didn't get it, my mother did. She gave a copy to me and two college buddies to read on a long ferry ride. She only got it because she wanted to see the Miss America stuff.) Are they [the straights described in FORUM who engage in anal sex] just as bad, in Arndt's view? Being gay is not about sex; it is about love and affection. Or am I naive? Mr. Arndt stirs my emotions. It makes me defensive. I certainly hope I'm not a health risk. I take precautions. Mr. Arndt, why don't you advocate that gays take care to insure that they minimize their chance of getting AIDS? I don't see where you get off knocking the Gay Men's Health Crisis people. If you're so concerned why don't you man one of their hotlines? Not your problem, huh. Easier to criticize. Everyone takes health risks. The air quality is low today. Can I have a sip of your Pepsi? Buckle up. How do those new headphones sound? Gee, that looks good. 55 saves lives. Look both ways. Should we change the sheets? Are you gonna finish that? Don't sit so close to the TV. Boy, did you get tanned. Biological. Physical. Chemical. God Bless You! There are gay guys that choose to engage in activities which are currently very risky. Like anal sex with strangers. These gay guys don't do things like that because they are gay. They do it because they are either stupid, uninformed, or irresponsible. Or maybe lost. These things are unrelated to being gay. Being gay just has to do with whom you choose as your companion. Also, Mr Arndt, attitudes like yours only make things worse. How? Well, it goes like this. Little Johnny is either going to be straight, or be gay. There is no proven method for determining or setting this course. There is just nothing that has been shown to be effective in persuading Johnny about whom he should choose for his companion. BUT, you can have an effect on how Johnny expresses his desires. Attitudes like yours, Mr. Arndt, make Johnny feel like a real worthless piece of shit. If I were Johnny, and I met you, I wouldn't feel so hot about myself. So Johnny tries to go about expressing his desires in ways that won't cause the people he loves to suddenly hate him. I'm not saying Mr. Arndt that YOU would disown your son if you found out that he were gay. It's just that, with the attitudes you express, he would have good reason to believe that he might lose a little of your affection for him. You see, the persecution of gays is what causes gays to do the things that the persecutors see as unfavorable. If Johnny knew deep down in his heart that you wouldn't have him any other way then maybe he'd be proud to bring home the boy he met at the ice cream parlor. To see if you approved of this boy. To see how you felt about this boy maybe becoming a part of the Arndt's extended family. But no, Johnny would never bring his ice cream parlor boy home to you Mr. Arndt. In fact, if you were Johnny's dad, Johnny would never be able to really love another gay person because he would be filled with too much self-hatred. Making people hate themselves, and feel bad about themselves isn't good for anyone. Mr. Arndt, you don't make me feel good about myself. You don't make me feel good about being gay. Why do you enjoy being so mean, huh? I'm sorry, I just don't ever see the greatest good being serviced by hate. You seem to have a lot of hate Mr. Arndt. You may not think so, but ask around. Your heart certainly is not filled with love when you talk about gays. Ah, but that's not your problem & it's easier to criticize. If you want to go on making people feel real bad about themselves, then just keep doing what you've been doing Mr. Arndt. It won't drive ME into the bushes searching for a little self-affirmation of my worth. I know what you're up to. But I sympathize with Johnny who feels so ultimately unloved that he would rather risk death than face constant isolation of the soul. Mr. Arndt, it's not that I don't like hearing about AIDS. In fact I do; after all, I want to know what I can do to avoid getting it. But I don't like hearing about it from you. I don't think anyone thinks your looking out for them when you send out your warnings about AIDS. They're not even warnings, they're taunts. I'm done now. In the future I'll just 'n' over your articles unless I see the word 'love' in the subject line. You can use that as a cue to all us net.motss'ers so we'll know when you've changed your tune. Goodbye, Mr. Arndt. It's been o.k. chatting with you. I apologize to you for the public nature of this letter, but my hope is that other people will benefit by reading it. That's usually why I post articles. Another Letter For The Arndt File from Robert DeBenedictis