fisher@smiley.DEC (Gerry --- Terminally Inane) (09/05/85)
RE: A straight woman's perspective. >...Also, >to be honest, I would hesitate to post to this news group because I would >not want anybody getting the wrong idea about me, even if I am married. Of >course if anybody did, that would mean they also read this news group, right? >...You live a life and emotions I do not understand, >only because you are in a situation unlike any I have ever known. Not quite! Think back to that ridiculous, nagging fear that someone would read your name on the net, that someone might believe you are lesbian. Imagine that fear, like a dull pain in your stomach, every day of your life that someone may hate you enough to do you harm simply because you love differently than they do (or do you?). Think of how indignant you might become having to look over your shoulder constantly. You may not be intimately familiar with gay culture, but after the trepidation you felt about posting your message, I'm convinced that you are well aware of *one* of the great motivating factors behind many aspects of the behavior of gays and lesbians: fear of societal retribution. I don't want to give you the impression that I'm getting ulcers thinking about how people are going to "get me." But, I am very, very open. I realize that I could get hurt, emotionally, financially, socially, and physically, because I choose to live an openly gay lifestyle. I'm not suffering that much, but the pressure gets to you every once in a while. At times like that, I see the necessity for a "gay ghetto," or at the very least, a gay bar. At times like that, it's a comfort to be with people to whom you do not have to justify your very existence. The tricky part is to avoid the compulsive behavior that can be a knee-jerk reaction to such pressure. -------------------------------------------------------------------------- By the way, anyone who wants to post anonymously to the net, I would be glad to help. Feel free to contact me. Gerry Fisher ...decvax!decwrl!dec-rhea!dec-smiley!fisher *************************************************************************** Nashua, NH: Where the men are men, and the sheep are nervous.