dyer@tau.DEC (This did not happen to/Pablo Picasso) (09/10/85)
See The Rainbow!________________________________________________________________
I'm very sorry to see the intolerance I've seen in this group regarding
the issue of bisexuality. It seems to me that all of the problems I've seen
cited regarding bisexuals would go away if we were all tolerant of each other's
sexual orientation.
Idealistic? Perhaps. But I see the day when all sexual orientations
are accepted. To quibble amongst ourselves about whose is "better" or "more
authentic" is to move that day further into the future.
What's best for you is not necessarily best for anybody else. It's
hard not to feel threatened by that fact when what's best for you makes you an
oppressed minority. But diversity is not the threat; intolerance is. Diversity
is a beautiful rainbow.
<_Jym_>
:::::::::::::::: Jym Dyer
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::::. :: .:::: Statements made in this article are my own; they might not
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> I'm very sorry to see the intolerance I've seen in this group regarding >the issue of bisexuality. It seems to me that all of the problems I've seen >cited regarding bisexuals would go away if we were all tolerant of each other's >sexual orientation. Huh? Did I lose a bunch of news articles? I've seen very little here of what passes for 'intolerance' when cranks appear. And where were the discussions of which was "better" or "more authentic"? Frankly, I find this appeal to a murky, inauthentic idealism misrepresents a large part of the discussion, and offers to replace it with the stony silence which had saddled this newsgroup for a long time. Hell, what are we doing posting to this group at all? Call me a cockeyed idealist, if you must, but I think it would be wonderful if gay people and straits lived together in perfect harmony. Who needs a newsgroup? Let's all go home and think good thoughts. Phfffft! I think this bisexual exchange was one of the most fascinating I've seen on the net in a long time. It "brought out", as it were, many ROMs and ROBs, and presented an almost kaleidoscopic diversity of sexual options and opinion, some perhaps rather opinionated, but none mean- spirited or closed-minded. It was a wonderful opportunity for people to shatter some preconceived notions of what it means to be a sexual being, and I think it was an education for all of us, straight, gay bisexual, or otherwise. -- /Steve Dyer {harvard,seismo}!bbnccv!bbncc5!sdyer sdyer@bbncc5.ARPA
dyer@vaxuum.DEC (This did not happen to/Pablo Picasso) (09/21/85)
Re: See The Rainbow!______________________________________________
Good Heavens! Little did I suspect when I wrote my plea
for tolerance and unity that I would elicit a flame from Steve
Dyer (who has always had better things to say than "pffft")! I
guess I didn't get my point across. I'm trying again.
Recently there has been a series of articles in this
newsgroup about the subject of bisexuality. As Steve pointed out,
the discussion did indeed illustrate that we are a diverse group.
Unfortunately - and this was the point of my previous article - it
also illustrated a common form of intolerance towards bisexuals.
The intolerance has continued since my previous article.
I've read that bisexuals are "fence-sitters," "wimpy homosexuals,"
and that they should restrict themselves to gay culture.
This issue hits home with me. My closest friends are
almost all bisexuals. (I myself register as a "1" on the Kinsey
Scale.) Perhaps our experiences can illustrate what I'm talking
about.
First of all, there is no "bisexual culture" _per_se_.
Bisexuals are pressured to be either gay or straight. Visit your
gay friends, and you're bound to hear how awful the straights are.
Visit your straight friends, and you're bound to hear how awful
the gays are.
Gay culture, this newsgroup included, seems to be just as
intolerant about others' sexual orientations as straight culture
is. (I say "seems to" because I know of no study done to measure
the relative levels of intolerance. My statement is based on my
own experiences, my friends' experiences, and the fact that the
intolerance in both cultures is something that bisexuals consist-
ently mention to psychologists who ask about such things.)
I'm amazed to hear things like "you shouldn't be bi, you
should be gay" from gay people who have had to put up with hearing
"you shouldn't be gay, you should be straight;" you'd think they'd
know better! If somebody is attracted to Members Of Either Sex
(MOES?), that's their sexual orientation. Nobody should tell them
what their sexual orientation should be. Would *you* want some-
body to tell you what yours should be? Of course not!
(By the way, most complaints I've seen about bisexuals -
here and elsewhere - are not really about bisexuals, but about
people who either are not or are not believed to be bisexuals!)
My point is that we must all hang together or most surely
we shall hang separately. One cannot promote gay rights while
perpetuating bigotry, because bigotry is at the root of anti-gay
attitudes and institutions.
<_Jym_>
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